One of my favorite things about blogging is keeping it real. Even around the new year when the whole “be the perfect person/wife/family” voices can kick in, I try to fight the good fight and remember that authentic = awesome. And perfect = most likely impossible. So if our house is a mess I’ll make a video to prove it (without even putting my bra away first). If we don’t know how the heck to tackle a project, we’ll admit it (like this). If we fail miserably at an undertaking, we’ll blog alllll about it (like this and this, just to name a few).
We actually love being a DIY diary that’s literally about the good, the bad, and the ugly – because a blog that’s only about the good kind of feels like it’s only telling half of the story. We’re just regular folks attempting to do regular DIY things with a real-person budget while learning as we go. We don’t have any formal training. Five years ago we painted all of our trim the wrong finish, didn’t own a power drill, and our house looked like this:
When we started this blog we were literally DIY beginners, just trying to figure out how to hang curtains and get a good deal on appliances. And although we’ve slowly gained some hands-on experience over the last 4+ years of this blogging thing, I thought I’d start the year (January 17th is still sort of the beginning of the year, right?) by saying a bunch of things out loud to the internet at large that might surprise you. Or maybe not if you really know me.
#1. I don’t have the perfect marriage. It’s amazing how many people ask if John and I ever fight. Is it possible to be married to someone for nearly five years and not fight? Dude, we fight like the best of them! Not loudly in front of Clara, but we definitely can get into it. We’re individuals. Individuals who love each other, but we definitely each have conviction and strong willed tendencies (hello, I’m Italian and from New Jersey). And those convictions and strong willed tendencies can definitely lead to heated discussions, adamant disagreements, and full blown arguments (about anything from a parenting decision to a home improvement snafu). We’re a pretty normal couple I think. We love each other like crazy, but sometimes in the stress of renovating or raising a toddler the moment gets the best of us and we snap. But when we do, we try to remind ourselves that we’re in this together. We both have the same goals (a healthy and well adjusted daughter, and beautiful and safe home, to make each other happy, etc). We’re a team. A sometimes dysfunctional or crabby team, but a team none the less.
#2. I don’t have the perfect child. Sure, there are amazing things about Clara, like how good of a night sleeper she is and how much she loves singing and dancing (and eating funny things like hummus and pickles). But as anyone else who has a 20 month old kid can attest – they’re not all sunshine and roses. Clara cries, teethes, gets mad, throws food, rips magazines, has tantrums, and does all those other things that toddlers do. So yeah, I deal with the same “oh man, she’s sick” or “ack, she’s screaming” or “ohemgee she just threw up an entire pumpkin muffin all over the car seat” issues that every other mom deals with. And let’s not talk about my labor (scariest day of my life) or the 14 months of breastfeeding (I loved it, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that it took work, energy, and dedication – especially when I was painting and DIYing between those feedings). It’s a good thing she’s totally worth it. I love that bean to pieces. She’s not perfect, but she’s perfect for us.
#3. I make design mistakes (and life mistakes) – all the time! Our rooms and our lives are in a constant state of flux (our first house took us 4.5 years to finish, and we’ve only been here a little over a year) – so sometimes we’re still feeling around in the dark and we make the wrong call. And later we see the light and say “umm, what were we thinking?!” and course correct. I think the key to recovering from mistakes in general (decor-related or otherwise) is not to be married to that mistake. And to attempt to right your wrong. Say you buy the wrong sized rug but don’t realize it for a while (like we did in our living room). Once time passed and we figured out what could be improved, we decided to reuse the old one in another room (or craigslist it) and save our pennies to upgrade it. That approach helped us (and the room) move forward. If we ever become frozen in fear of a mistake that we’ve made (or the fear that we’ll make one) that’s when a room stagnates. We’d never get past decorating mistakes (or life mistakes) if we didn’t learn/adapt/evolve along the way. Our goal is for our house (and ourselves) to always be changing and growing. No freezing in place allowed. Because you usually can’t get around a life obstacle or a DIY debacle if you’re just stuck there standing still.
#4. I’m awkward and probably less cute, stylish, or “put together” than you think. I have paint in my hair and under my nails 24/7 (well, this week it’s grout). My shirts are all stretched out from breastfeeding (yup, still haven’t replaced those). I am covered in dog fur and/or accidentally sporting some smear of jelly/cream cheese/humus five days out of seven. Seriously. Someone chime in here who has met us. We get comments like “I’d freak out and embarrass myself if I ever met you” but I’ve got you covered. I won’t even notice you freaking out over my intense weirdness. Once I spun around at Target and screamed “Chiiiiiistmas stuff is already out!!!” while holding two wooden trees up to my face like Cindy Lou Who to John. But it wasn’t John. It was this woman I’d never seen before standing there staring at me with a baby in her cart. So I tried to smile and quietly make my way to another aisle and she said “Oh my gosh I love your blog” …. and I nearly died of embarrassment. Not only had I been “that crazy person” in front of a stranger, it was someone who “knows” me. So I stuttered and tried to talk about her cute baby and then John and Clara came to my rescue and I stumbled away while mentally kicking myself in the face. Yup, I’m that awkward.
#5. Sometimes I get nervous and insecure about our future. Not gonna lie, being a “small business” (and even more random than that, being a “professional blogger”) is hardly a job with health insurance and a 401K (more on that here and here). We just try to have faith that we’ll end up somewhere ok since we never thought we’d be here five years ago… and here we are. Sure it helps that we saved up a just-in-case cushion (to keep us afloat for 6-9 months) before John left his day job when Clara was born, but I’d be lying if I didn’t shout “yes – we get nervous and uncertain and insecure about what lies ahead sometimes!”
#6. I roll my eyes at myself. I get it. I really do. I am fully aware that I’m obnoxiously enthusiastic. My blog puns often make me gag a little. I’m the less cool version of that adorkable Zooey Deschanel. You know, without the good hair and the great voice and the comedic timing. I’m her half sister Gooey or something. So although my sunny demeanor might make you want to stick a spork in my eye, know that I’m fully aware that I’m annoying – and sometimes I try to rein it in – but I usually just let my freak flag fly. Why? I figure that blogging is all about being yourself and owning it and sharing your life in an authentic way. So I’m not reserved and cool and collected and refined. I’m hyper and giddy and nutty and weird. And 4+ years later that formula just works for us. So gosh darn it, I might call presents “prezzies” or make a crack joke. That’s just how $herdog rolls.
#7. My house is usually a disaster. At any given time, our frame wall might look like this…
… but our sunroom probably looks like this…
There’s always at least one giant pile of something-to-be-sorted somewhere. And don’t even get me started on the playroom. That room is out of control.
So I guess the point of all that soul baring is to assure you that I most definitely do not have it all figured out. I’m just a chick from New Jersey who started a blog who sometimes forgets to take her contacts out at night (I know, I’m so bad). I’m that gal who discovers that I have strawberry cream cheese inexplicably smeared all over the left side of my ear in line at Target. True story. I don’t know it all, and I don’t have it all, and I’m so thankful to be right where I am. Perfection is kinda overrated anyway, right? I’m many things, but most of all: I’m a work in progress. Kinda like our house.
Leigh says
I loved this post. It’s so easy to forget that blogs show very little of a persons life. You are funny and personable and we wouldn’t have it any other way!
P.S. Aren’t we all more awkward in person? I have a 6 month old and have gone to work (more than once I am ashamed to say) with baby puke in my hair. Oh and don’t get me started on my boobs leaking through my bra at Target….embarassing to say the least and to make it worse, I was holding my son and he was climbing down my chest to them ready to eat! People were kept looking at me and at him and smiling. Oh my gosh I could have died right there. Needless to say my baby and I went to the car and my husband finished shopping. :)
YoungHouseLove says
If I had a dollar for every time I nursed in the Target parking lot… haha. Let’s just say I can relate.
xo,
s
Jessi says
I love how real you guys are. And that you don’t mind pulling back the curtain every once in a while to show us how really real you are. It makes me feel like I’m not the only one who spontaneously dances in Tar-jay while her husband rolls his eyes, claps her hands and squeals like a maniac when she gets an electric pancake griddle (there may or may not have been a dance routine involved, too) and secretly kinda likes her MeanMizzJezzi nickname (I’m looking at you, Sherdog! And, no, I’m not really mean ;).
Seriously, thanks for making the world feel like a smaller and more familiar place. I really feel like you guys get it.
Koliti says
WOW Sherry! I just read your Pregnancy/Labor/Delivery story – a VERY powerful story! Your writing had me chuckling during some pregnancy parts, then at the dramatic heart-wrenching parts I was gasping and saying “Oh, NO!” out loud. I worked as an RN in a high-risk Labor & Delivery unit for 9+ years – and it is amazing just how fast the team can deliver a baby by emergency C-Section! And the Neonatal Intensive Care Team never ceased to amaze me with their quick expert care for babies in need. I’m so glad you were pregnant with Clara, a girl (girls are much tougher than boys – as if we didn’t know). What a roller-coaster emotional experience to live through! Thank you for such a well-told story from the mom’s perspective. Thank you for sharing your story.
Oh, I didn’t know that people were thinking you were PERFECT! Where have I been?
Good to know that you are just happy, goofy, grateful, silly, weird, messy, thankful, creative, quirky……
What I have noticed is that your love for each other shines through each pic and post! Thanks for being a happy read and for being YOU!!!
David says
This is far and away my favorite post to date. It is always encouraging to know that we arent the only people whose house and lives are in a constant state of remodel. Keep making each other happy.
Michael - Innkeeper says
this is probably the best blog post i’ve read all day. real and honest is always best!
thanks for sharing $herdog. Let your freak flag fly!
Kristin says
Ditto to all the affirmations above!In case it’s not clear, one of the reasons we all love you is that you’re a little dorky. (In a good way! Really.) But there’s NO WAY you’re “less cute” than we think you are.
Just so you know, if I am ever lucky enough to run into you guys around RVA, I’ll be just as excited as you were to see the Christmas stuff at Tarhay. (Or maybe as excited as you were to meet Nate.) And I will probably embarrass myself even more than you did. :)
kaylan says
please know that you are quite fabulous even with the ‘imperfections’! thanks for this post. your realness is one of the reasons i come back to your blog everyday.
Sarah- Nadine says
Thanks for keeping it real. Makes me feel so much better that my house is not organize all the time and that I only have time for DIY projects in small doses even though we seem to have multiple ones going at any given time.
I love reading your blog daily so keep it coming.
Oh and my hallway paneling turned out pretty good. Next step will be sanding, primnig and painting the doors.
Amanda says
This post makes me so happy – I’m glad you’re “normal” people. I keep trying to live up to my perfect picture of your lives, and that just doesn’t work when your (aka my) husband insists on checking for studs multiple times (they’re not moving) before actually putting a mark on the wall (not even a hole yet). I’m so glad you’re not perfect, but I’ll keep pretending you are, because it helps light a fire under my home-improving bottom!
MaryBe says
Say what you want, we still think you’re awesome. And Clara is still adorable when she’s crying <3
Susan says
Just a few more reasons why we love you and your goofy self! Thanks for keeping it real!
Amanda says
PS – I also love the pictures of the piles. I keep trying to kick my piles under things, and it keeps not working.
Elizabeth says
Sherry you are not Gooey!!! You are wunderbar and we all love you. I just talked about how much I love you on my blog on Friday. http://strawberriesinparis.com/2012/01/13/lemon-sausage-chard-lasgana-for-fridays-with-friends/
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, thanks for the love!
xo,
s
Allison @ House of Hepworths says
I love that you keep it real. I try really hard to be 100% real and authentic on my blog as well. I think people really are drawn to that. At least, people tell me frequently that they like my blog because I’m “real” (and they like my projects too, I hope!) lol
Anyway, I thought you were super duper cool when I met you in person. I was SO NERVOUS about meeting you guys that I couldn’t eat all morning and got my stomach all in knots. I appreciate how nice you were to me and my family, even though I know I was a huge dork. I’m not usually like that, but my nerves just really got to me knowing I was meeting a “celebrity couple”. So, like you, I act really dorky and totally embarrass myself on a daily basis.
I have nothing but positive things to say about your blog and even more about you and John as a couple. You guys are definitely the real deal.
xoxo
Allison @ House of Hepworths
YoungHouseLove says
Aw Allison! It kills me that you were nervous! We had so much fun chatting with you and taking you guys to the toy store!
xo,
s
Emily says
You are hilarious! If only I lived on the East coast.. I just know we would be friends. :) And I’d totally call you $herdog. :)
Amy @ Elephant Eats says
I love this post :) Sometimes it’s so hard not to read blogs and imagine that the bloggers’ lives are perfect…but obviously people aren’t going to blog about their fights, messy rooms, etc. Your blog def keeps it real more than most and your down-to-earth personalities are what keeps the blog all the more interesting, relateable and funny!
Ashley says
This is one of my top 5 fav posts you’ve done, Sherry.
YoungHouseLove says
Aw thanks guys! You’re all making my day.
xo,
s
Caroline says
I already liked you but this post made me love you. Thank you for being so honest and open about yourself. It’s easy to look at your beautiful home and family and think “wow, she’s got the perfect life” but it’s nice to know you’re a real person (not that we thought you were a robot before). Your post and this blog are a million times better than the ones where people try to pretend they’re perfect or constantly try too hard to get a laugh. Your humor (and John’s, too) is goofy and genuine and that’s what makes people love reading YHL.
Sarah says
Love this post. And thanks for showing that it’s OK for couples to fight!
Also, where do you buy your jeans? I like them!
YoungHouseLove says
Old Navy! And sometimes the Gap when I’m feeling fancy. Haha. But you know I wait for a clearance sticker…
xo,
s
heather says
I also get all of mine there. They fit wicked nice (for me) and are affordable too so I don’t feel like AHG! if I ruin a pair.
Julieanne says
Hi S & J! I had to chime in here as I loved your post but one thing in particular made me laugh, here in Australia (where I am from) ‘prezzies’ is actually a really common word for presents! We use it all the time as we shorten (or turn into slang) so much of our vocab ;-)
Sending you love from Sydney, Australia xx
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, if only it would catch on over here!
xo,
s
Jenny F. says
Hands down my favorite YHL post to date – and I’m right there with ya on the annoyingly high level of enthusiasm. But my fiance says that’s his favorite quality of mine – that the smallest, simplest things give me a perma-smile – so it can’t be that bad, can it? :)
anna see says
This was awesome! Perfection is over-rated! You are fabulous!
Paula says
Best post ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Keep up the amazing work! People love you because of that, I think. You’re so real!
[email protected] says
OK, I will admit it: Some days I just can’t take your perkiness. Those days I read for the great information you consistently deliver. While I always think you’re being who you really are, there’s something in this post that feels more authentic. It’s not that I think one has to be flawed/down-in-the-dumps/hanging-out-the-dirty-laundry to be authentic. There’s something in your tone here that’s just a little different. In a good way. It’s really cool. Appreciate your honesty and bravery (every day, not just today).
Lauren says
Love this post. Love.
It makes me feel so much better about myself. Because I literally don’t have a day where I don’t like find peanut butter on my shoulder or accidentally send my office an email containing just the word “poop.” (Yes that definitely happened – after like two weeks on the job.)
So thank you for keeping it real, seriously. I am pretty sure I will never stop reading.
Oh and in case you’re interested. Yep, A for Awkward indeed.
http://filingjointly.blogspot.com/2012/01/seriously-who-wrote-that-on-my-sock.html
YoungHouseLove says
Hahah, the word butt never fails to make me laugh. Especially when inexplicably written on a sock.
xo,
s
VVednesday says
Thanks so much for posting this! I check your blog every day and always leave thinking you guys are this perfect little family in a perfect little bubble. I think I enjoy you guys even more now after the reality check!
Amy says
Great post!
Amy F says
you are adorable, even with your cream cheese ear schmear! keep doing what you’re doing-thanks for keepin it real.
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, I do love a good schmear.
xo,
s
KathyG says
It’s a balance. One day perfect, one day not so much. I think your blog is good at that. Some blogs are so downer, complaining about the former owners, complaining about stoopid husbands, complaining that they don’t have time…
Glad you guys found the balance that it YHL.
Krys72599 says
I don’t really think anyone thought you were “perfect,” per se, just really, really lucky! Cute couple, adorable baby, funny puppy, and gorgeous home… That said, what I like the best is that you’re real – you show the dirty laundry (not referring to your bra, Sherry!): the brown paneling you lived with before you painted, the layout that didn’t work, the too-small rug, the ideas for a kitchen layout that went the way of the wind when you went in a completely different direction, how no matter how it seems like your stuff gets done magically, you’re still counting pennies, saving nickles, and spending dollars when you have to… and cutting corners and making decisions that didn’t work and had to be corrected… You’re real, and we love you for it!!!
Alexandra says
I LOVED LOVED LOVED this post. The reality is that unlike face-to-face contact, you get the opprotunity to edit yourself, your home, and your relationships to appear however you please. It honestly would be weird if you shared the latest fight with John, not to mention that it probably wouldn’t help your relationship any; a clean room always looks nicer than a messy one; and pictures of crying babies are seldom as precious as the ones with their big smiles. So thanks for cutting back on the ugly, and using your time wisely to share what does work (even if it didn’t really work)and write about what benefits your readers.
Eileen says
thanks for this post ~ just makes me love the blog even more! so important for us all to remember that underneath a seemingly perfect exterior, we all have our flaws. yesterday a friend posted this on facebook and it really struck a chord with me:
http://www.danoah.com/2010/09/disease-called-perfection.html
it highlights how dangerous it is to fall into the trap of always needing to appear perfect. the more of us who embrace all our flaws, the better we can fight that “disease of perfection”
P.S. I live not too far from RVA and head there often for shopping excursions ~ if I ever bump into you I will probably be star struck but will remember to say hi anyway – we can be awkward together :)
marie says
girl, you are hope/ encouragement for all of us awkward/ overly-excited/ messy/ career-unsure/ artsy types!
and i’d be happy to run into someone who can channel cindy lou who at target any day. i’d happily play the grinch to keep the game going. or max.
love y’all bunches ~m.
Laura says
Best post ever. My friends and I often admit to being pretty depressed by how amazing your home/life looks compared to our late twenties bachelorettehood. It’s awesome to hear that you have real-people moments!!
Lea B says
Haha I totally relate to the Target thing. I don’t know how many times I’ve embarrassed myself at a store by putting arm fulls of items into a total stranger’s shopping cart thinking it was my husband pushing it. Or when I see something I really like I pretty much tackle it and then carry it around the store with me…I’m pretty sure I resemble Gollum with the caressing and whispering “my precious” oh so tenderly to inanimate objects.
Love your blog:]
Anna Scherling says
It’s so easy to fall victim to blog envy, combining the admirable qualities of every person in my Google reader and creating this perfect blogger who is amazing at everything and doesn’t exist. So thank you for being genuine, open, and honest. I love it.
Carli says
And we love ya! Just the way you are ;) Thanks to you (and John) for making me smile every day!
Debbie @ Pink Texas Chick says
Have you any idea how much better I feel about myself?! :)
Jessika says
Hey there. I appreciate this post greatly. I think a lot of people on a blog or twitter or facebook or (insert other social networking tool) put out this “always perfect” persona. There’s a neat saying (it’s on mugs and t-shirts) that says “may your life be as wonderful as you make it seem on Facebook.” SO TRUE for so many people. I told one of my single friends that if any married couple (or couple dating longer than 3 months) tells her that they “never fight” that they are outright lying. How are you supposed to build and get stronger if you don’t know where the weaknesses are to fix? Thanks for keeping it real.
Krystle @ Color Transformed Family says
Thanks for sharing and reminding us you are real and not a fictional scripted character on tv. I love it when people are open about their flaws.
Sofie says
Seriously, I knew there was a reason I liked you. I think this is it. :)
Alison says
What brought this on? Somebody criticizing you? Sounds like you are trying to defend yourself. Nobody is perfect.
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, you’re the third person to ask that, but nope! I just love keeping it real and thought it would be funny to write a list of a few of the things my BFFs know about me. We’ve been sharing other random posts about ourselves since we started blogging (like this one and this one). I guess I’m just a hopeless over-sharer!
xo,
s
Alison says
Well, if you did it to get your posts numbers up, It worked.
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, we don’t really think about that stuff. Posts that we think will be huge hits can be duds and posts like this that I toss up on an afternoon on a Tuesday (which is typically not where we stick posts that we think will be thrillers, haha) can randomly surprise us! So we have stopped trying to predict what will be “favorites” and just write whatever pops into our heads!
xo,
s
Robin says
I can’t speak for others but I can speak for myself. I LOVE your blog because you are so real “trill” (in urbandictionary) slang…
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=trill
For the record #4 had me dying in my cubicle here at work. Oh emmm gee. lol.
Becca says
BEST POST EVER!!!
Abby says
Yay for imperfection!! It makes us all who we really are. One more thing–I’m glad you realized your too small rug selection was not right for your den/living room. Take one more hard look at those slipcovers on your dining room chairs!! I love everything else y’all have done, but I think changing those up would make that room so much better!!! It is the first room you walk into from the front door–just a suggestion from an also imperfect but trained and licensed Architect and Interior Designer.
eileen marie says
Actually, Sherry, that was a list of all the reasons we love you.
Hillary says
#4 sent me into a fit of giggles. Thank you for that!
Mel Heth says
This is so funny, I was just thinking today about writing a “we’re not perfect post” on my blog.
I think everything you said up there just makes you (and John and Clara) even more loveable. :)
Annie says
Love you $herdog! And all of your crazyness!
Emma says
Whenever you feel to urge to self-censor – don’t! You’re a hoot $herdog. Think of all of us poor saps stuck in offices staring at computer screens – we need a little comedic relief (Exhibit A – I just spent 4 hours on an expense report). Thanks in advance!