One of my favorite things about blogging is keeping it real. Even around the new year when the whole “be the perfect person/wife/family” voices can kick in, I try to fight the good fight and remember that authentic = awesome. And perfect = most likely impossible. So if our house is a mess I’ll make a video to prove it (without even putting my bra away first). If we don’t know how the heck to tackle a project, we’ll admit it (like this). If we fail miserably at an undertaking, we’ll blog alllll about it (like this and this, just to name a few).
We actually love being a DIY diary that’s literally about the good, the bad, and the ugly – because a blog that’s only about the good kind of feels like it’s only telling half of the story. We’re just regular folks attempting to do regular DIY things with a real-person budget while learning as we go. We don’t have any formal training. Five years ago we painted all of our trim the wrong finish, didn’t own a power drill, and our house looked like this:
When we started this blog we were literally DIY beginners, just trying to figure out how to hang curtains and get a good deal on appliances. And although we’ve slowly gained some hands-on experience over the last 4+ years of this blogging thing, I thought I’d start the year (January 17th is still sort of the beginning of the year, right?) by saying a bunch of things out loud to the internet at large that might surprise you. Or maybe not if you really know me.
#1. I don’t have the perfect marriage. It’s amazing how many people ask if John and I ever fight. Is it possible to be married to someone for nearly five years and not fight? Dude, we fight like the best of them! Not loudly in front of Clara, but we definitely can get into it. We’re individuals. Individuals who love each other, but we definitely each have conviction and strong willed tendencies (hello, I’m Italian and from New Jersey). And those convictions and strong willed tendencies can definitely lead to heated discussions, adamant disagreements, and full blown arguments (about anything from a parenting decision to a home improvement snafu). We’re a pretty normal couple I think. We love each other like crazy, but sometimes in the stress of renovating or raising a toddler the moment gets the best of us and we snap. But when we do, we try to remind ourselves that we’re in this together. We both have the same goals (a healthy and well adjusted daughter, and beautiful and safe home, to make each other happy, etc). We’re a team. A sometimes dysfunctional or crabby team, but a team none the less.
#2. I don’t have the perfect child. Sure, there are amazing things about Clara, like how good of a night sleeper she is and how much she loves singing and dancing (and eating funny things like hummus and pickles). But as anyone else who has a 20 month old kid can attest – they’re not all sunshine and roses. Clara cries, teethes, gets mad, throws food, rips magazines, has tantrums, and does all those other things that toddlers do. So yeah, I deal with the same “oh man, she’s sick” or “ack, she’s screaming” or “ohemgee she just threw up an entire pumpkin muffin all over the car seat” issues that every other mom deals with. And let’s not talk about my labor (scariest day of my life) or the 14 months of breastfeeding (I loved it, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that it took work, energy, and dedication – especially when I was painting and DIYing between those feedings). It’s a good thing she’s totally worth it. I love that bean to pieces. She’s not perfect, but she’s perfect for us.
#3. I make design mistakes (and life mistakes) – all the time! Our rooms and our lives are in a constant state of flux (our first house took us 4.5 years to finish, and we’ve only been here a little over a year) – so sometimes we’re still feeling around in the dark and we make the wrong call. And later we see the light and say “umm, what were we thinking?!” and course correct. I think the key to recovering from mistakes in general (decor-related or otherwise) is not to be married to that mistake. And to attempt to right your wrong. Say you buy the wrong sized rug but don’t realize it for a while (like we did in our living room). Once time passed and we figured out what could be improved, we decided to reuse the old one in another room (or craigslist it) and save our pennies to upgrade it. That approach helped us (and the room) move forward. If we ever become frozen in fear of a mistake that we’ve made (or the fear that we’ll make one) that’s when a room stagnates. We’d never get past decorating mistakes (or life mistakes) if we didn’t learn/adapt/evolve along the way. Our goal is for our house (and ourselves) to always be changing and growing. No freezing in place allowed. Because you usually can’t get around a life obstacle or a DIY debacle if you’re just stuck there standing still.
#4. I’m awkward and probably less cute, stylish, or “put together” than you think. I have paint in my hair and under my nails 24/7 (well, this week it’s grout). My shirts are all stretched out from breastfeeding (yup, still haven’t replaced those). I am covered in dog fur and/or accidentally sporting some smear of jelly/cream cheese/humus five days out of seven. Seriously. Someone chime in here who has met us. We get comments like “I’d freak out and embarrass myself if I ever met you” but I’ve got you covered. I won’t even notice you freaking out over my intense weirdness. Once I spun around at Target and screamed “Chiiiiiistmas stuff is already out!!!” while holding two wooden trees up to my face like Cindy Lou Who to John. But it wasn’t John. It was this woman I’d never seen before standing there staring at me with a baby in her cart. So I tried to smile and quietly make my way to another aisle and she said “Oh my gosh I love your blog” …. and I nearly died of embarrassment. Not only had I been “that crazy person” in front of a stranger, it was someone who “knows” me. So I stuttered and tried to talk about her cute baby and then John and Clara came to my rescue and I stumbled away while mentally kicking myself in the face. Yup, I’m that awkward.
#5. Sometimes I get nervous and insecure about our future. Not gonna lie, being a “small business” (and even more random than that, being a “professional blogger”) is hardly a job with health insurance and a 401K (more on that here and here). We just try to have faith that we’ll end up somewhere ok since we never thought we’d be here five years ago… and here we are. Sure it helps that we saved up a just-in-case cushion (to keep us afloat for 6-9 months) before John left his day job when Clara was born, but I’d be lying if I didn’t shout “yes – we get nervous and uncertain and insecure about what lies ahead sometimes!”
#6. I roll my eyes at myself. I get it. I really do. I am fully aware that I’m obnoxiously enthusiastic. My blog puns often make me gag a little. I’m the less cool version of that adorkable Zooey Deschanel. You know, without the good hair and the great voice and the comedic timing. I’m her half sister Gooey or something. So although my sunny demeanor might make you want to stick a spork in my eye, know that I’m fully aware that I’m annoying – and sometimes I try to rein it in – but I usually just let my freak flag fly. Why? I figure that blogging is all about being yourself and owning it and sharing your life in an authentic way. So I’m not reserved and cool and collected and refined. I’m hyper and giddy and nutty and weird. And 4+ years later that formula just works for us. So gosh darn it, I might call presents “prezzies” or make a crack joke. That’s just how $herdog rolls.
#7. My house is usually a disaster. At any given time, our frame wall might look like this…
… but our sunroom probably looks like this…
There’s always at least one giant pile of something-to-be-sorted somewhere. And don’t even get me started on the playroom. That room is out of control.
So I guess the point of all that soul baring is to assure you that I most definitely do not have it all figured out. I’m just a chick from New Jersey who started a blog who sometimes forgets to take her contacts out at night (I know, I’m so bad). I’m that gal who discovers that I have strawberry cream cheese inexplicably smeared all over the left side of my ear in line at Target. True story. I don’t know it all, and I don’t have it all, and I’m so thankful to be right where I am. Perfection is kinda overrated anyway, right? I’m many things, but most of all: I’m a work in progress. Kinda like our house.
Jordan says
And this is exactly why this is my favorite blog to read!
Keepin’ it real!
By all means, $herdog, let that freak flag of yours fly! Mine will be waving in the wind somewhere nearby!
Jen says
Your post was awesome! I lol’d especially at #4 because we saw you guys at Einstein bagels one morning and I wanted to go up and say hi so bad but I was so nervous and so scared that I didn’t My husband made so much fun of me about that and said that you all were probably used to people spotting you and saying hi. Who knows, maybe next time I won’t geek out and be bashful haha.
YoungHouseLove says
Aw you should have said hi! I definitely would have had cream cheese somewhere on my face though! Ha.
xo,
s
emily @ the happy home says
oh, $herdog. i really want to bake you a cupcake and have some tea. you’re awesome.
Randa says
Since you asked, I’ll chime in on #4… you guys are totally fun and real and yes, human (which makes you more fun & real in that relatable sort of way). I’m glad I got a chance to meet you in November. Sherry, you struck me as fun & kind but also confident and comfortable in your own skin (raising your hand to ask the first question during Grace Bonney’s Q&A, and standing up to actually ask it when she called on you… not things that a self-conscious person would naturally do!). I guess that could be strictly personality, but to me it also says that your childhood was primarily positive and your parents imbued you with confidence growing up, which it also seems like you’re doing with Clara.
The Target story is hilarious! Awesome.
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, that’s sweet of you to say! I was so nervous for Grace and I worried no one would ask a question so I shot my hand up just to start the flood gates of questions. You know how everyone asks after one person gets it going? I just didn’t want her to stand up there to silence. She’s such a nice girl. Seriously, everyone who has never met Grace Bonney would be blown away by her kindness and realness.
xo,
s
Randa says
That’s so cool… and it makes sense, I’ll do things out of my own comfort zone if I think it would help someone else. And yes, the floodgate phenomenon is generally true, and it worked that day! :)
Grace does seem like a very genuine person.
Ha haa… just re-read my first comment and realize that it sounds like a psychoanalysis, which was not my intent (nor am I qualified for such!) :) It was meant more to be an observation that positive parenting that encourages exploration and effort seems like such a good thing, for short & long-term. :)
YoungHouseLove says
I thought it was so interesting! I don’t even remember standing up so that must have been some sort of reflex. Haha. I surprised myself!
xo,
s
Elisabeth says
Freak flag…. immediately thought of the Ford Focus commercial with doug, the orange puppet.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFeRo1Kg7GE&feature=relmfu
And then I hoped upon all hopes that this is the way that you and John fight
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCq0MD6A22Q&feature=relmfu
Keep creating this fantastic blog. I’m not going to lie; I check your blog every morning when I wake up and I get a little sad if there isn’t a new post up. Let your freak flag fly!
YoungHouseLove says
Hahaha- hilarious. I was cry laughing. That’s some amazing casting (for the guy AND the puppet).
xo,
s
julie g. says
1) I really needed this post today and 2) I love you just the way you are!!! And “NEW GIRL” rocks – I love that my husband says, Zooey is the TV version of me.
sofie says
I love you $herdog! Thanks for keeping it real.
Jenna says
Thanks for keeping it real! You can find design blogs, but it’s hard to find blogs that make design so accessible. It’s much appreciated and enjoyed!!
Josie @ Couponing Made Simple says
awesome post, sherry! i can’t thank you enough for sharing your trim-painting error. i’ve been staring down my trim for MONTHS and feeling downright depressed about it. knowing someone else has made the same mistake and lived to tell about it is encouraging. not that it makes me anymore excited about repainting it, but i DO feel less bummed out. :)
Catherine says
Love this. Love you. Keep doin what you do, $herdog.
Stacy says
And there you go, making us like you even more :).
Katied says
i love this! obviously the whole reason why we read your blog obsessively is because you are hilarious and crazy and weird. but also, sometimes i do get jealous of how perfect your life seems, so thanks for this post.
mribaro says
I’m giving you a high five for being a member of the moms-with-smears-on-clothes club! :D
A stranger might think you have a stain on your trousers right above your knee, but a fellow mom recognizes that it’s your precious 20 month old one’s hug and a kiss (right after lunch time) :)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- I have those all the time. Practically my uniform.
xo,
s
mandie @ moxiemandie says
What a precious & encouraging post. As a chick who’ll be turning 30 this year, I’m going through many of these thoughts & feelings myself. It’s sorta hard learning to be you without holding yourself to an impossible standard.
Yay for Sherry.
YoungHouseLove says
Aw thanks guys! You’re all so sweet. $herdog be all blushy and awkward over here.
xo,
s
QS says
You’re not living unless you embarrass yourself – or your family! This is why a lot of us read your blog everyday – to know that we are not the only ones who squeal when they get an awesome deal on a light fixture, tile, etc.. Keep keeping it real!
Nora says
Oh man, I totally do super embarrassing things all the time. I might be a founding member of the If It’s Awkward, I’ve Done It club. I would probably have a permanent sweaty mustache if people recognized me all the time.
Emily says
Where did this come from? It kind of makes me sad that you felt the need to write it.
Just keep doing what you do. It’s keep me reading for over two years!
YoungHouseLove says
Don’t be sad! I just wrote it because I thought it would be fun to share messy house pics and “reveal” that John and I fight and Clara’s not perfect. Haha. The best thing about blogging is sharing that stuff- all of it!
xo,
s
Stacy says
Thank you for sharing! It’s nice to know that the people we read about are actually “real” and have “real” experiences. It makes me feel a little bit better about the cat hair and the baby goo that I end up carrying around all over when I leave the house. Also, thanks for sharing the number train that Clara loves so much a few weeks back. My 16 month old daughter finds it hysterical.
Regina says
I so needed to hear this. My husband and I bought our first home a little over 2 years ago, and I’m constantly feeling like we’re not decorating correctly or quick enough. It doesn’t help that we have unique and obscure taste and can’t easily find things of interest off a shelf at a big box store. But the point is that our home should reflect our personalities and not someone else’s. I too need to accept our house being in a constant state of flux and view it as us growing. I need to not worry about that one bedroom filled to the brim (thankfully I can close the door) with boxes that haven’t been touched since we moved in and reflect on the beautiful library we put together over winter break. I keep telling myself, “one room at a time.” Plus, this is the first time we’ve been on our own and there’s pride in purchasing your own home at 25.
Sorry for my rambling. This is the first time I’ve actually commented on a post other than your giveaways, but I’ve been stalking your site since it used to be called that other name that you had to change. ;) Anyway, thank you for doing your thang and keepin’ it real! ~Regina
statia says
Thank you so much for this. I want to put your painted hair, messy shirted self in my pocket. (and not in that weird icky way). You guys are such an inspiration by being real people.
Deb In NJ says
Sherry, Sherry, Sherry…
Someone needs to come back to NJ for a while. Really?
Still love ya though.
Jen says
Confession: I started reading your blog when my sweet SIL became pregnant, she was really interested in the cloth diapers. I remember the day I said “show me what you’re talking about” and she pulled up this (ahem YHL) blog. Yes, that’s right- and you thought everyone was here just for DIY cabinets? While my mind is still blown by cloth diapers (I’m only a dog mom to date) I’m so glad Angela intruduced me to YHL. And today, I think I just fell a little bit more in love with you VA folks! You guys are so adorable, so real. Thank you for sharing your lives with people like me who you will probably never meet IRL!
Kristal says
I love posts like these. It’s so easy to put bloggers in the celebrity category b/c often times they blog about things that you wish you did/had etc. (not to mention you don’t really know them on a personal level). It’s nice to see that you guys have the same hopes, dreams, worries, and quirkiness that the rest of us do.
Sharon says
Well thank goodness you are both “normal” because I was going to have to find 2 new DIY bloggers to follow faithfully if you were anything less. Really you guys are GREAT!!
My husband & I met as teenagers and I think we stayed together , at first, because everyone had bets on how long we’d last. We just wanted to win that bet and we were both stubborn, outspoken individuals. In June we’ll hit 30 years and we both won.
Keep up the great, yet imperfect, work. You are both a huge hit. Thank You.
Sarah says
Sherry!! This is an awesome post. The most beautiful part about being human is that nobody is perfect. We are all unique individuals. Much like design, not everyone is going to like it, but the people who don’t like it don’t matter anyway. Just as long as YOU know you’re amazing…we ALL are in our own wonderful way!
Holly says
I think it is so easy to think you’re perfect because most people are sort of in awe of your posts. Everything always turns out so fabulous and you seem to work together so well! It is nice to know you guys are human too though :). I think you’re hilarious and adorable.
sangeetha says
Thanks for the honest post!
Erin says
I love that you embrace your awkward. Most of the time I feel like people don’t get my humor, so I’m usually laughing at my own jokes. Embarrassing, but hopefully that’s part of my charm. Maybe not.
Keep doing what you’re doing, it’s obviously working and we all love coming back to see what awesome stuff you guys are up to!
Laurie says
Italian girls from Jersey represent! :) We rock!
Angela @ Happy Fit Mama says
Thanks for keeping it real, $herdog. It’s nice to know you are just like the rest of us!
Carol N. says
Thanks for this update! We recently had a whole house remodel and had to pack up (and now unpack) everything in our 3000 sq ft house. Ouch! I still have some boxes to unpack even after 3 weeks of being back in the house and I was being down on myself today but I need to realize that it won’t always be perfect and that we don’t live in a magazine. At least I am making progress every day so I need to remember that.
Danielle says
This is probably my favourite blog post ever! Thanks for always being so real :) So many blogs make me feel like my house will never look good because my basement is just as packed as your playroom and projects always seem half finished! It’s great to see how beautiful your home is despite the small things that remain unfinished!
P.S. Your sunny disposition is always uplifting—keep it up guys!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw thanks guys. You’re sweet.
xo,
s
alex says
My favorite post so far…except the one when Clara arrived. I think everyone feels the need to convey their life is awesome to others…i.e Facebook, blogging etc…but when you can step back and write honestly about yourself and then post it for, literally, the world to see…thats a brave and admirable feat. you guys started out as a DIY blog…and that still holds true…but, you guys are a great life blog as well, maybe not in an advice way…people admire your wholesome-ness and genuine love for what you two do and I can honestly say (as will about 1million other people) that you guys are everyone’s daily friend…and we think of you as friends. And as friends…we love you just the way you are…crazy, awkward, optimistic as a golden retriever and all.
Thank you for inspiring us all even in the smallest way.
Catherine says
I still have tears in my eyes over the Target story. LOVE that. And my house looks a bit like yours when you first moved in. There is hope for me!!
Amie says
You are as awesome as you are because you let us into your imperfect world, and celebrate it with you. This wouldn’t be Young House Love if it didn’t involve $herdog’s puns, John pop-tshirts, and Clara and Burger running through the photos.
Amy @ All In A Day says
I love everything about this post!! You literally made me “LOL” {with a possible snort….please tell me I’m not the only who snorts when I laugh!!}. I hear weird is “in” these days! ;-) xoxo
Katya says
“Who’s that girl, who’s my girl, it’s $her(dog)!!!”
Love ya all so much, because you are real (probably crashed your server the day you posted Clara’s Christmas gift video, listening to Clara’s wash, wash, wash ;)over and over again – such a cutie! Stay as you are please! We like hyper, giddy, etc.!!! XO
Megan says
Love this post. I like the quirkiness.
Your prezzies comment reminds me of Tom Haverford on Parks & Rec. That is a compliment – I think he is hilarious!
YoungHouseLove says
Haha – that is the best string of sentences ever uttered. I was crying when I watched it for the first time.
xo,
s
Kim says
Preach it! Also, great pic of Clara – gotta love toddlers :)
Elaine K says
A great post, but my favorite part is when you said “Clara’s not perfect, but perfect for us”. All of us parents need to remember that at times. Especially as they get older, it’s hard not to compare your child to the kid who gets straight A’s and is the best player on the team.
Sarah says
Thanks for the refreshing post! I don’t like spending money on clothes either, I work it as long as possible. I still have a denim maternity skirt I’ll wear, and my youngest is 3.5. (Actually it was too small to wear when I was pregnant so I need to get my money’s worth out of it!)
Lindsay says
Sherry and John – I’ve been reading your blog for a year and I absolutely love it. You guys are like one of my favorite books where I just love the characters and then the author decides to turn it into a series – YAY!!! I sooo appreciate this post. This is the first post that I’ve ever felt the need to comment on. Thanks for keeping it real!
Nancy says
The Nester says it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful. I don’t think she is talking about just decorating. Once a guy friend of mine told me that perfection was boring, but imperfection was really sexy. He gave me all kinds of interesting examples (can you tell he was getting his masters degree in poetry?) and sure enough, I started to notice the things that are really beautiful are imperfect. Messed up hair, a crooked smile, something out of the ordinary on your mantel, an old bench with layers of paint exposed by the wearing and smoothing of many years of use. But since I tune in here daily and sometimes find myself measuring myself to your yardstick, I appreciate a little peak into the real life of YHL and another reminder that it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.
Jennie says
There is a Japanese phrase, “wabi-sabi” and it celebrates the beauty of imperfection. I love it! It makes the idea of “perfection” a lot more realistic and comfortable. I think there is a cozy friendliness to the whole idea and if you embrace wabi-sabi, you’ll find a lot more happiness in everyday things that might stress you out otherwise. So fitting!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, I love that!
xo,
s
Meredith says
Oh, not to be nit-picky and it probably fits in with the “perfectly imperfect” blog theme, but I believe you mean soul baring (no ‘e’ since you’re exposing your soul and it isn’t physically lifting anything—at least I hope not!) :)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- you’re right! Off to fix it.
xo,
s
Ashley says
I love this. I try to keep it real on my blog as well…I show all my DIY screw ups, my 21 month old and his destructive tendencies, and the piles of crap all over my house. I don’t think I’ve ever shown the world my bra though, lol.
I do have to admit, if I ran into you somewhere I’d totally have a “OMG it’s Sherry Petersik!” moment. But then you would say something awkward and we would be friends :)
rachael says
I’m hoping that John writes something from his POV soon too! This post is great, it is exactly why I like your blog so much, you guys are so funny and so fo’ real about everything! Your writing style makes everyone feel as though you are a friend speaking directly to them. And for the millionth time, I am dying in anticipation for your book!
Kali says
Best non-project-related post. Ever. While most of the time your blog makes me feel like a big fat failure because I can’t accomplish .5% of what you do on a daily basis and it reminds me I have about as much motivation as you do in your right pinky finger, it’s also very inspiring, educational and above all, entertaining. Keep on keepin’ it real.
Barb says
And just let me say that the year I have followed you…I feel like we could definitely be friends. Many days my husband comes home and asks me how Sherry and John are today. Scary…..
Just want to say….we love you both just the way you are. And yes, we think Clara is Perfect.
B.
Meg@ Keeping up with the Jenks' says
Oh $herdog, you crack me up! The target story almost made me pee my pants.
totally agree, no ones life is perfect and what we put on the Internet is only a small fraction of our days (even for a professional blogger like you. I mean, you move things around and don’t tell us.gasp.)
But, whilst reading this I couldn’t help but think that I dont want you to short change yourself. You do have a wonderful family, job, and life! And you’re humble to boot. Pretty perfect I say.
Elyse says
BEST POST EVER! Your real-ness (and John’s) is why I check in with you every day. Keep it coming!