Since it’s Thursday afternoon and we’ve been known to veer off into random territory (like this, this, this, and this), I thought I’d toss another one on the barbie, er, blog. Below are things you probably never knew about me and John. Is it proof of our over-sharing tendencies? Yes. Evidence that we’re more than a little weird? Absolutely. But we just had so much fun with a Ten-Things-You-Didn’t-Know-About-Us post waaay back in 2009…
… that we thought it was high time we broke out this post three years later. So without further ado, some random bits:
1. I’ve always wanted to name a band. Not be in one or marry a rockstar. Just name one. All the time I say something weird and exclaim “that would make a great band name!” My favorite band name brain child: “What Ever Happened To Breckin Meyer?” (said out loud after seeing an old Road Trip trailer). Other favorites: “Exhibit A” and “Venn Diagram.” I know, I know. I’m certifiable. But it’s my idea of a good time. Also, I came up with “Pass The Mustard” last night and I’m kinda into it…
2. We assign babies to correlating animals. In a very very loving way. For example Clara’s a turtle. And a little bird. We see both of those animals in her all the time.We have about a million pictures that we glance at and say “Tuuurtle!” or “It’s The Bird!” She also has cousins who are a chipmunk, a bear, a monkey, and a puppy. Seriously, they all have assigned animals – at least in our heads. Here’s Clara’s “angry bird” face.
3. I know she’s not everyone’s cup of tea (and I might be a little scared if she was), but I’m totally under (as in, in no way over) Bethenny Frankel. I’ve seen every episode of Housewives Of New York, Bethenny Getting Married, Bethenny Ever After and even read her book called A Place Of Yes (I thought hearing about things like almost getting on the regular Apprentice and ending up on the Martha Stewart one were fascinating because there’s lots of behind the scenes stuff). And this next part might be polarizing to admit, but once a few years ago after a particularly good old episode of Housewives of New York I turned to John and said “now I totally understand why people get tattoos of celebrities.” Yikes, right? I just adore her hilarious honesty about herself – and I know some people are over her now, but I’m still on the train. She’s just so quick to confirm that she went crazy or had a lapse of judgment instead of denying it. I think it’s refreshing and I try to use that as my inspiration when I’m feeling defensive. That’s right, Bethenny Frankel is my inspiration. Hey, whatever works, right?
4. Nearly almost every day of Clara’s first six months on this planet she peed on her dad while he changed her diaper. We heard that was only a boy thing, but as soon as the first diaper came off, she just let it flow. And she usually made the face below. Is that not a Dr Evil/Mini-Me face or what? Hilarious. Note: John did not find it as hilarious as I did.
5. John’s favorite comeback (well, maybe second to “That’s What She Said”) is “Your Face.” No matter what someone says. For example, this dialog has actually transpired in our house – Sherry: “Oh man, did you leave that bag out in the car?” John: “Your face.” And for some reason I laugh every time. It’s his catch phrase. And I guess if pressed mine is “I do what I want!” spoken in a faux bratty tone. Even as a response to John asking if I’ll hand him the remote (which I then do and follow up with a pouty “here, but only because I wanted to”). Dorks for life.
Now it’s your turn. Tell me five random things, or at least one, about you. Do you put ketchup on your steak? Sing show-tunes in the shower? Count stairs whenever you’re on them (I totally do that in my head most of the time). Come on guys, let’s have some Thursday afternoon bonding, shall we?
LOL … “your face” is my husbands go to, staple, comeback. Our typical conversations go about like this, “Me: Do you think I should paint that chair white? My Husband: no, you should paint your face white!” He’s a mess, it makes no sense, but every time he says it I laught like a two year old.
xoxo
The normal progression in my house is 1) Your Face 2) Your Mom …. 3) Your Mom’s Face
We totally do the same thing!!! It started with my husband’s brother saying it, but now we both use ‘your face’ as our comeback too!!
Thats exactly what its like in my house too! Julie, we followed that same progression, but it became a last word issue So now it usually goes like this:
husband: In your face.
me: In yours.
Hahaha! I’m glad we’re (sorta) normal!
My husband is a little more fixated on the derrière (yes, I just Googled that so I knew how to spell it!) Typical dialog: “Where did you put the car keys?” “Your butt” What do you want to have for dinner?” “Your butt?” “How was your day?” “Your butt”
Makes 0 sense!
What? You count stairs too?? Totally thought I was the only person who did that. Mine are in increments of four – “1, 2, 3, 4…” and then I start over – “1, 2, 3, 4…” until I read the top or bottom of the stairs. (Note: I mostly do this when walking up stairs, not down.) Someone once told me that was a sign of OCD, but I dunno. At least I’m not the only stair-counting OCD lady out there then!
we’re all a little sheldon, aren’t we?
I count stairs too, but usually going down when my hands are full so I don’t mistep and tumble down them.
Steph! I do that too! In increments of FOUR! I thought I was the only one too… my uniqueness it totally in question now.
:)
I count steps too!! That’s crazy! So glad to know that I’m not the only one.
Ha! I love this place! I count stairs too, but only going up. There are lots of loooong escalators in the DC metro that I usually walk up and I usually don’t even realize I’m counting until I hit about 25 or 30.
Ack! Me too! In fact, I’ll take multiple steps on one or two stairs so I can end on the landing on four. :)
Hahaha! MEE TOO! I count each flight and start over at the next flight…but usually in 4’s and then 5’s (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,5) then on the last flight (which is usually the longest) I go all the way through without starting over.. typically going down but sometimes going up too… I think it has to do with the rhythm that I’m moving… so if I’m tired i typically don’t count going up because I’m moving sluggishly :) I don’t really count much else, though. According to the DSM there has to be more actions of obsessions and compulsions to diagnose OCD… no worries for most of us :)I could give you more details, but you probably don’t want to be bored with those! Because, yes Kristen, We are all a little Sheldon :)
I count stairs-but only going down :) and I count them all in a row :).
My husband uses the “Your mom” statement–even during a normal conversation his answer is ‘Your mom’ or he’ll walk in to the room & say ‘What’s your mom doing?’ haha
I totally count stairs. I can’t tell you how much it pleases me that there are two sets of 7 steps to get up to our 2nd floor. It didn’t have to be 7, but the fact that it’s even is nice.
My husband has abbreviated his comeback statement to “Face!”. He uses it the same way someone would say, “Gotcha” or “I told you so.”
We have a dog named Jobu (pronounced joeboo) and we constantly say his name. Sometimes we answer the phone and just say “Jobu” instead of Hi. We even say “Sweet Jobus” at night instead of sweet dreams. i’m not sure why or how it happened, but it did and it stuck. If Jobu could talk he would tell us we are insane.
This is hysterical!
LOL!!! I think you may have started a trend…this could catch on for sure. ;-)
I’m seriously dying at this, I actually can’t stop lauging. And now I want to name a dog Jobu.
My best friend and I do this with the brand of toilet, Beamus. I don’t even know why or how this started, but it is oddly comforting to see other people do this, except, you know, with a dog name.
Thanks Everyone! If I start hearing people saying “Jobu” randomly I don’t know what I would! It would be hysterical. #jobu
haha this funny!!!
my sister does this with her cat. it’s always funny. Replacing song lyrics with the cat’s name, etc.
Leah we do that too! We are always popping Jobu into everything! My husband answered the phone and said it and i laughed and thought of this post!
HAHAHA! Are we airing our idiosyncrasies here? Oh yeah! Let’s get our freak on!!
1) We totally say our animal’s names (and nicknames) over and over again, too, aaand in different voices! We also talk FOR them and TO them (AND the house plants and the yard plants and the squirrels and rabbits out in the yard) not to mention imitate their actual vocalizations–lots of doggie whimpers, kitty mews & squirrel chitters going on over here! We apparently agree each of our four fur babies has their own “voice” and we can tell whom the other person is “imitating” by the tone they use. Our female kitty is the most persnickety of the bunch so she suffers from perpetual brat voice, our male dog is the youngest (and dumbest) and speaks accordingly.
2) We also have a LOT of nicknames for each other and take on “roles” or “personalities” (not weird at all, right?!) of our different nicknames based on our moods (Chicken is my bratty/whiny “I do what I want!” face, but Fritzy is most likely to drop a spoonful of ice cream on the couch and get away with it. My husband literally transforms into “Teddy Bear Britches” in his fuzzy pajamas.) and we even give our nicknames nicknames…my husband will call me some combination of “Boo Boo” “Blueberry” “Blue Bird” “Bub Bub” “Boo” “ReRah” “Love Love” or “Lovey” in a PUBLIC PLACE without thinking twice. Love him.
3)I’m nice to plants and animals and inanimate objects and can get pretty protective of them…Like, seriously riled. As in I once wept for the squirrels when the boys up the street stole their acorns when I was a kid. I somehow got so upset I managed to convince the boys to COLLECT MORE ACORNS to pile at the base of the Squirrel’s tree to apologize. Insane I know. But still to this day I apologize to a plant for bumping into it.
4) My husband and I are best friends and allow each other to be our own weirdo selves. We work together and spend most of our free time alone together at the house being ridiculous. We sing off-key made-up ballads around the house and do silly dances and make goofy faces just to make the other laugh. Honestly, we just act like kids a lot and don’t judge each other for it. His farts still make me giggle.
5) I face our can labels and alphabetized the colors of our closet for a change of pace…which is crazy because my husband will never put anything back in the same place!
So there. My deep dark secrets. Certifiable I know, but I guess I just found the right one to love me!
Omg Jobu Alisha that is the best thing I have ever read. I want to be best friends.
Yebo (yeah-bo), not far off from joeboo is actually a form of “hello” in South Africa!
Ha! Hilarious. My husband’s favourite activity is replacing words in songs with our dog’s name (Smidgen). It works best when the song is completely unrelated to dogs and the word being replaced has an entirely different number of syllables to Smidgen.
Dog owners are weird.
Alisha- we totally do your #1… but never in front of other people. Each of our cats has a voice and a personality. We now do it for our 6 month old…though I’m guessing we’ll have to cut it when he catches on and starts talking in cat voices….
Aww. My husband and I say “your mom” kind of like that. For example.
ME: This traffic is unbearable.
HIM: Your mom’s unbearable.
Hahah!
xo
s
My husband does this too. I’ve taken to answering him as if he is seriously talking about my mom. It gets pretty funny.
Me and my husband are the exact same way. Our moms get involved in everything, poor ladies.
That totally warrants an “what you say about my momma?” reply lol.
Omg this made me laugh so hard! my husband thinks I’ve lost it…
ha! My husband and I definitely still say this! I’m glad we’re not the only ones!
LOL!!
Yup, my husband is also on the ‘your mom’ train after all these years. It doesn’t matter how much it DOESN’T make sense, he still blurts it out.
… I think the worst part is when he does it to someone who doesn’t know him very well. Yeah, it can get interesting. LOL
Totally a “your Mom” user, too! The best is when my husband’s brothers get in on the “your mom”-ness too…in front of, you guessed it, THEIR MOM!
Bro 1: Pass the potatoes
Bro 2: Your MOM passes the potatoes
Bro 3: Ohhhh…..BURN!!!!!
Me: Your MOM burns…
…and so it goes…
1.I know I have said this before, but I totally count my steps. Not even just on stairs. EVERYWHERE.
2.Similar to your “I do what I want”, I like to tell my husband that “I am a grown up and that I can do whatever I want”. hee hee. He likes when I am being whiny/bratty (how many girls can say their husband actually likes that?)
3.I have an EXTREMELY weird habit of pointing out songs that I feel would be good stripper songs.
4. My husband and I smell our Basenji’s feet. Yes, I know, weird and maybe gross to some. But they smell like Fritos and we love it.
5. I have always had a crush on Alan Alda.
Aren’t you glad you asked? :)
I totally thought I was the only person to have a crush on Alan Alda– Wow! I am so relieved not to be alone on that one!!
I used to know a couple who had a dog and they named her something like frita because they said her feet smelled like fritos!!
Alan Alda!!! M*A*S*H* is my favorite show on the planet. ^_^
I lurve Alan Alda!!! My hubby got me his autograph for my birthday a few years back (the same birthday we got engaged!) I love M*A*S*H, but now we can BOTH appreciate him on “30 Rock.”
Although I’ve had an OBSESSION over Peter Tork from the Monkees since I was 13. Like, I used to send him handmade birthday cards every year and make a cake to celebrate with my fellow Monkees fan best friend. Even had a HORRENDOUS bowl cut like his (and this was in the ’90s). Ahhh…it’s good to get that out in the open.
See, this is like therapy! Haha!
xo
s
Hahaha, we smell our dog’s feet too!! My husband says they smell like Doritos!
We call that Frito smell on our dog’s feet “Feet-o’s” And I totally drop my dog’s name into the theme song for “30 Rock.” It’s just me repeating “Zeke” in time to the song. In my defense, he seems to like it. :)
My puppy’s feet smell like fritos too! My sister noticed this years ago with her lab and I thought it was a fluke. Since then, every dog’s feet that I’ve smelled have smelled like fritos. Wow, that makes me sound like a foot smelling weirdo…I don’t do it to ALL dogs, just the one’s I know. ;)
That is too funny Maureen!! In regards to #3, my husband and I have a yellow lab, and I always call him “Frito Feet” because of the way they smell! My husband thinks I’m nuts, apparently he doesn’t like to smell the dog’s feet…
Is anyone else concerned not with the fact that our dogs’ feet smell like Fritos, but that Fritos smell like our dogs’ feet?!?!
LOL. I totally had to look up the Frito thing. Apparently it’s a known “condition” called Frito Feet. The first site I came across the lady said initially she likened the smell to popcorn and I freaked out because I’ve been telling my husband for the last 4 years that occasionally our dog smells like popcorn. Now I know why! He’s got frito feet. Haha. Anyways, I guess it’s just yeast microbes and it’s totally normal – unless the smell is super strong or overwhelming. Then it could be an infection.
OMG, I’ve keep hearing people say their dogs’ feet smell like fritos…what is this???
YES!
Our cat (Poe) totally smells like Fritos! We usually refer to her as “Frito-Poe” on a daily basis! So strange!
OMG I always say that my dog smells like potato chips, but hers lives in her ears, so I sneak a smell in there basically as often as possible :-) haha, this stuff is hilarious!
I don’t even have a pet and I am dying laughing at these frito comments!! I will never eat fritos again without thinking of this!
Alan Alda is amazing and I will always love him.
Haha I am always telling my fiancé that our dog smells like white cheddar popcorn!! He does not agree.
My husband and I smell our dogs’ feet as well! We also love how our dogs smell a 1-2 weeks after a bath–you know the shampoo smell has worn off but they don’t smell like stinky dog yet. Finally, my husband and I do the “your face” thing as well except we say “your face” and then repeat what the first person said. Like I would say “Honey, can you take out the trash?” He would respond” Your face takes out the trash!” It gets a little out of hand. We also make up songs about our dogs and each other constantly. Some have become long time family favorites.
Oh My Gosh,
i totally think my dogs’ feet smell like stale crackers! I love it! my husband thinks its weird ;)
My favorite Basenji smell is after they’ve been curled up ina ball sleeping…they have amazing “sleepy smell”…can’t think of what it reminds me of but I love it!
I know I’m late to the party here, but these comments are killing me! Especially the Frito feet! I don’t even have a dog and I just want to find one and smell it’s feet to see what everyone is talking about. I wonder if my cat will let me smell his paws without scratching the crap out of my nose. hahaha
OMG! I was just talking with a friend about this and we both agreed our dogs smelled like Fritos or tortilla chips. It is nice to see we aren’t alone.
I heart you guys. ;) I do the same “I do what I want!” but only in a Cartman tone. “WHATEVA WHATEVA, I DO WHAT I WANT!”
ha ha! I totally read that in Cartmans voice!
Bahahahaha, I do that too!!!… so funny!
I also say ‘ I do what I want!” but it’s done in the voice of a bratty 15yr old who’s gone wild and is now on the Maury show.
Hahaha ONE of our quirky things as a couple is constantly doing Cartman’s “You will respect my authori-tie!” to each other.
love it! I’m so glad I’m not the only Cartman quoter…only slightly different.
Husband: Want to go to a movie?
Me: IT’S MY HOT BODY I DO WHAT I WANT!
:)
YES. My bf and I do the exact same thing. Way too frequently.
Ha! My mousepad is Cartman “Respect my authori-tie!” Hubs and I also do the “I do what I want.” then usually add how many gangs (pets in this case) we roll (sit) with. Lol
Random Thing About Us: I used to be the go-to person for relationship advice with my friends- now, since meeting nate, I flat out tell people to not ask me any. My relationship is the 1 in 10 million and should not be held as a standard. People think I’m crazy lol
Sherry, are you the honey badger?
Hahaha!
xo
s
I used to assign animals to people all the time. It was a big thing for me in high school. Usually when I was bored and we had to sit in the gym during finals. I would just randomly think, hey that person is totally a horse. I kept this knowledge mostly to myself. LOL
My friend’s fiance is and has always been a prairie dog. My other friend’s ex-boyfriend was a muppet.
I name everything… my car, my plants, anything that I interact with on a daily basis. I went so far as to make “name tags” (little signs on toothpicks) to stick in each plant pot. I am convinced that it makes them feel loved and therefore they grow better. I guess this is my version of a green thumb. And my plants, especially Buttonwillow, agrees.
(Wow… re-reading that, I think I may have a problem).
thats completely normal… well for me at least. every object has a name and actual people and pets have names and multitudes of nicknames. for example my dog’s name is jeager, which we NEVER call him. he goes by weenie, bubbles, puddles, boo, weenie bear, pooh bear.. etc. and all of the house plants have names. its probably odd that i do this but its even odder that my hubby now does it too. “did you water planty and planty jr?”
Oh good – we’re not the only ones who do this! Owen the oven, Bertha the Fridge (she’s big!), Stevie the TV, Peter the Heater…it’s ridiculous! We were even trapping a rat in our garage and somehow he got named Winston – btw, Winston is dead now…
Naming things (Stevie the TV) makes me think of Joey on Friends! We totally do that at my house too :o)
Bahahahaha! Ammie, that’s hilarious! I love your names. We have always named our cars and houseplants. The last one was Marley, after Bob because it was a tropical plant.
I name everything too!! Our cars, GPS, toaster – I love it! It makes me happy and that’s reason enough to keep up the craziness. The only sad part is when you lose one of them. Last year my car, Alice, was totaled…murdered. A texting teen murdered my Alice. I will always miss her.
Along naming – I make sure my current and upcoming kid names are scream-able. As in “how does it roll off my tongue as I am yelling for them?” Let’s be honest – it’s an important attribute.
Ok, #5 literally had me dead in my chair because ALL three of your catchphrases are ones I use on the daily. I’ve recently added “Just love me” when people don’t seem to want to do what I demand.
Hahahahahahahhha. Done. Acquired. Boom. Shall be trying it out within the hour.
xo
s
i’m the baby gotta love me!
Hah!
xo
s
I recently adopted Maebe Funke’s “Marry Me.”
And yeah, I’ve totally been legally married for five years. It’s only awkward about 60% of the time, which is 100% perfect.
I love all the catch phrases too! The one we use is
BF: “see what im getting at?”
Me: “I see what you’re throwing down”
Makes us laugh everytime…
Oh, I’m stealing that, too. LOL!
My husband and I use “Givin’ him the business.” We heard it on ESPN once. The announcer said something like “that tackle gave that qb the business.” It makes me laugh every time, and it works for all occasions.
Haha! I totally say that to. Especially to my bf when he’s grumpy and doset want to cuddle. We also have taken to calling each other dude all the time. It usually comes out as ‘duuude! Why you doin that?!’…our friends think we’re strange!
I think Honey Boo Boo says “I do what I want.” Or said it. But you should so say it in that voice as I did when I read it.
I love the random posts!!
I love Bethenny! She is my inspiration as well. :)
I ask myself how old I am. A lot. I don’t know why. It just comes out. And sometimes it comes out – outloud.
Weird & embarrassing. (I’m 25 by the way).
Just yesterday I told someone I was 31 and then I stopped, pretty sure I looked up, and thought “wait is that right?” Haha!(I was right)
I secretly race people. Not in a creepy way. But if I’m walking down the sidewalk, and there’s a person walking down the sidewalk across the street from me, I’ll do whatever I can to beat them to the corner. I don’t know why I do this, but I totally get the “I WON!” excitement and silly grin when I pull it off.
Hahahahahah! Love it. Thanks for all the fun today guys. Hilarious.
xo
s
This is so funny!
haha! I do this too! Especially when we are walking into a restaurant at the same time as another family. I will leave my family behind just to beat the other family to the check-in counter!
I just busted out laughing out loud reading this. That is so funny! (and now I hope I don’t start doing it…)
I love to race random people.
That’s HILARIOUS!
I ABSOLUTELY race people into restaurants! My boyfriend get so mad when I leave him in the car, but I got priorities!
Omg Wendy I totally read that as, “I secretly rape people. Not in a creepy way.” I was like, how is that not creepy!?!?! Hahaha hilarious.
@Jana – Ha! Awesome. (Well…um…er… I mean…rape isn’t awesome…you know what I mean)
Oh my soul, I do that too!! Ha! Wonder what would happen if we were both on the same side walk?!? lol
@Chyenne – I would totally win. :P
I always proclaim “STOP TELLING ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE”(in a very dramatic fashion) Whenever someone suggests something mundane.
ex: Boss:”Robin, You seem to have dropped your pencil”
me: ” STOP TELLING ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE!”
or
Permanent roommate: “Thats the turn off coming up…”
Me: STOP TELLING ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE”
I cant even say why I do it. I just…do.
LOL. Totally stealing this one.
-John
Oh this is totally going in my repertoire. This is fantastic.
I’m going to do this now! That is hilarious!
This literally made me LOL and spit coffee on my computer!!! It will become a part of my quote rotation ASAP!
I can’t stop laughing at that…I need to remember to do start saying that!!
I’m totally with you on the naming of bands! Way back in middle school I thought Screaming Trees would be a great name for a band, and after a quick google search, it appears it IS a band name. Apparently I never got that memo. I also think Psychedelic Pop-Tarts would be a great name as well.
1. I’ve never had a pedicure. My friends think I’m crazy and deprived.
2. I count stairs as well. 36 at our last apartment. 0 in our house now.
3.I hate talking on the phone. Even to my husband. My mom and best friend are the only two people I actually enjoy talking on the phone to. I’d much rather text someone.
4.I’ll only ride thrill rides or roller coasters at the Disney Parks. Any other place it freaks me out too much and I will not ride them.
Love your band names. Amazing. We might need to have a Band Name Name Off!”
xo
s
Hey, Melissa! I’ve never had a pedicure, either, and am similarly judged for it. (I don’t like folks touchin’ my tootsies!) I ALSO hate talking on the phone — except with my mom and best friend (same as you regarding hubby).
It’s nice to find folks with things in common. :-) And I don’t think these things are weird, at all. Folks are just quirky in their own ways.
LOL! I have since college insisted a great name for an all girl punk band would be “Roast Beef Pussy” but it has yet to catch on….
I was going to start a punk band when I was in my teens and call it… Scotch Tape…
Hahahahha, I like it.
xo
s
That IS crazy!! You should get a pedicure!! Or does it freak you out? I have a friend that’s never had a manicure or pedicure – but it’s mostly because she is very frugal. :)
Thanks for making me feel normal!
Recently my friend got married and every girl got mani’s and pedi’s and I was like why do u guys waste money on such a small part of ur body! They call me crazy.
I also don’t like to talk on the phone except with mom and my bestie. Weird I know, but its awkward to think about things one after another to talk about.
I thought I was weird for these two qualities, but good to know m not alone :).
My husband and I constantly come up with band names! I came up with my best one while pregnant, researching breastfeeding: NIPPLE CONFUSION. Unfortunately, I am not very creative because the all-mom band in the movie Young Adult (starring Charlize Theron) is called Nipple Confusion. They must have gotten the idea from me!!
Haha, Nipple Confusion is hilarious!
xo
s
Oh the band name thing! Dave Barry has been doing that for years – WBAGNFARB – “would be a good name for a rock band” pops up in every other piece he writes!
You’ll enjoy these:
http://www.davebarry.com/rockbandlist.html
Hahahahah! Love it so much.
xo
s
On the theme of trees…my best friend in elementary school and I definitely came up with the band name “The Slap-Happy Trees”. That provided at LEAST an hour or two of entertainment.
Hahaa, it’s awesome.
xo
s
My freshman year of college, my roommate and I were in our respective beds, lights off, having one of those late-night roommate talks, and we somehow got talking about colors. And about some color (I can’t remember which), I said, “Oh, that’s probably my second place favorite color.” And she like, YELPED, “OMIGOD! SECOND PLACE FAVORITE COLOR?! THAT’S LIKE, THE BEST IDEA FOR A BAND NAME, EVER! I am so naming my future band that.” As far as I know, name’s still available…..
Haha, I love it!
xo
s
Love it!!! We do the That’s what she said” too.
1. Whenever my hubby and I get off the phone we never say bye, we always say “till then” some
2. My family has about 5 nicknames for each person
3. We frequently weave movie lines into our conversations
4. I call my sisters who live in Canada every morning as a “wakeup call” a tradition started by my dad
5. My little JBear and I always say:
Me: When your right……
JBear: your right!
I totally do the animal thing!! I love that someone else does that. I feel that most old people and babies look like turtles.
Haley – My sister and I have decided what animal people are since we were kids. Some times there was no animal. ie we went to school with a kid who was in fact a Gollum, and my sister is a critter from the Little Critter kid books.
In response to number 4 – the same thing happens to my husband with our daughter. I die laughing, he too does not fine it as funny as I do! :-) Our girls must find the need to start training their fathers young to make sure they are always on their toes!
Wow, no one has commented yet??? Well, I won’t leave you hanging. I talk to my dog, which I know is not strange, a lot of people do that. However, our entire family has a different voice we use and answer for him too…wierd, huh?
In a similar vein, I talk my house the same way I talk to my dog. Like I’ll get home after being away for a couple of days and say ‘did you miss me? I missed you. Who’s a good house!’ If it had ears i think I’d scratch behind them. My partner/mother/everyone thinks I’m nuts. Actually, having typed that I’m starting to see their point.
We reply on behalf of the dog all the time too! Our friends think we’re insane. If one person asks the dog a question, the other one answers based on his expression.
Yeah, guess we are crazy after all. :)
Kaity! I talk to the house too!
I talk to the house, too. Usually when I’m the only one home so I don’t sound too crazy. :-)
So I LOVE Bethanny too! I can’t help it. Her story is amazing and while I have vowed to never watch a single episode of any housewives show of any kind, I watch her “getting married” and “ever after” shows every season. Love.
And something random…I always wear slippers around my house. Always. I hate being barefoot and our hard wood it too slippery in socks. Even during the summer—slippers. Right now, in fact, I’m sporting a pair of fleece lined ones I bought on sale for stu, but took possession of even though they are way too big.
Oh my gosh! I always wear slippers too! I hate being barefoot in the house (floors are too cold, might step on a crumb and totally freak out, etc). When I walk in the door, I go straight to the closet to take off my shoes and put on my slippers. And my husband’s all like ‘Why don’t you just leave your shoes on?’ He’ll never understand. (and maybe nobody else will understand either?)
I always have socks or slippers on. I hate being barefoot. I will never understand people who go barefoot!!
I’m a “slippers in the house” girl too! As soon as I get home from anywhere, my shoes come off and slippers go on. And they’re actually my husbands, and they’re a tad big, but I hate the slim petite womens slippers!
I have to confess, when I see pics of Clara, Sherry, or John not wearing any shoes around the house I cringe!
I also have a problem going bare foot in a hotel room or someones house. Gross!
Hahaha! This was a fun post. My husband and I are totally nerds too! I usually say “Your mom” and he’s the “I do what I want.” We also are obsessed with Lord of the Rings so we call each other “my precious” or talk like LOL Catz.
“Can haz Christmas presentz tonights precious?”
Was not planning to post here, just enjoy, but I HAD to respond to this! My husband’s nickname for me is Sméagol because we were living together, but planning on engagement when the movies came out and he thought it was hilarious to imply I was coveting a ring. Irony is, the wedding band he picked out for himself looks EXACTLY like the One Ring. 8.5 years of marriage later and that’s still my nickname. And our 4 year old calls me that sometimes. Which is hilarious.
His come-back is “you’re a___” as in, “could you bring up the laundry basket?” “you’re a laundry basket” I think it comes from the South Park “you’re a towel” thing. And we also use “I just saying” all the time, based on a comment our nephew made as a toddler after dropping the f-bomb.
Also, I create movie casts in my head for any book I am reading, LOVE advice columns, swish my favorite soda, diet 7up around my mouth once before I swallow it and practically have a meltdown when I get the hiccups.
YES! My husband and I talk in LOLcats language to our cats. “You can’t climb that! You has no claws!” Or, “NO! You can’t has spaghetti!”
It slips into normal conversation and now my family thinks I’m insane.
Lol to #4!
-I get the most random cravings for artichokes. As in I will go to the store just to buy an artichoke, spend 18 minutes steaming in in the microwave & then just sit down & eat an entire artichoke with nothing but a little lemon juice & olive oil. Anyone else? No? Just me? sigh
-I randomly start singing about what I am doing at the time. (“I ammmm foldddddiiinnnngggg the laundry”) & never really thought about it much until my toddler niece started doing the same
– Peanut butter & pickle sandwiches are the shizz
– I can not sit still. Ever, & I’m not even aware I’m fidgeting 90% of the time (until my husband tells me to stop it)
-Even when I’m hot I feel like I need a blanket on me… I think I just like the weight on my legs or something… I dk
If you love an artichoke, then steam it then baste it with olive oil, grill for 2 minutes per side and did it a remoulde (sp?) sauce…. I can eat a whole artichoke easily!
I LOVE pb and pickles sammies!!!! with cheese! and a glass of OJ!!! all my fav flavs all in one place!
LOVE LOVE LOVE PB & Pickles sandwiches.. everyone thinks I’m crazy. In college, I would even buy the little pickles and dip them in PB!
Your laundry comment made me think of this [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9bKSGIoHi0&w=560&h=315%5D
I do the artichoke thing, too – except I didn’t know I could just MICROWAVE THEM OMG. Here I’ve been steaming them on the stove all this time! It takes, like, 35 minutes. I eat mine with mayo and curry powder.
I will totally nuke/steam an artichoke in your honor.
Haha love that How I met your mother episode! It is totally how I am in real life.
Yes people always think I’m crazy for PB&P but I’ve managed to convince a handful of those people to try it and every SINGLE one has ended up raving about it.
Amanda- I used to do them on the stove to but it is so much faster in the microwave! Only 15-18 minutes and it should be done (but otherwise the directions are pretty much the same- cut in half, rub with lemon juice & then olive oil, salt & a small amount of water in the dish)
Ha! My sister is fidgety like that too… we call her Fidgets and she happily answers to it.
I’m with you on the blanket thing too… I just stick my feet out!
I have had way too many dreams about you guys! I wonder what my brain is trying to process in that moment when you appear in my dream and I’m at your house watching Clara. Totally cray I know!
Also, your blog is the only blog that I have read on a consistent basis for 3 years! I usually stop reading blogs or only check them once in a while but I just love hearing about the house or getting a Clara update!
Awww, thank you for that!
-John
I DO count stairs! I thought I was crazy. ;-)
When I eat potato chips, I eat the crumbs first, then the ones with holes or abnormalities, and then the full, big guys are eaten last. Yay Darwin.
I only eat folded over chips.
OMG, I love folded chips! My husband passes his folded chips to me because he knows that they are my fav!
You are so lucky…my family eats them and taunts me while they are doing it!
Sometimes if I’m thirsty and want salt, I’ll have a swig of pickle juice (from a jar of Claussen pickles). Yum!
Mmm, me too! Claussen is the best.
xo
s
Oh I love pickle Juice. Especially Claussen’s!
I LOVE Claussen pickles too! But I have this weird texture issue where I cannot stand to eat the seedy parts of pickles (same applies to cucumbers), so I fillet them like a fish and just eat the outside. Mmmm, now I want some pickles :)
Yes! I LOVE pickle juice!
pickle juice is my jam. But only dill.
This post and the comments are killing me tonight. Thank you all for entertaining me on what was looking to be a very boring Friday.
Isn’t everyone hilarious!? If ever I were trapped on a dessert island I’d want it to be with all of you guys!
xo
s
Omg! I’m not much of a drinker, but when I do, I’ll go for a dirty martini, extra dirty, which basically means they just put in a bunch of the olive juice!! Sooo good! And I drank pickle juice as a kid too. Ha!
When I was little, my younger sister would drink pickle juice (to my disgust.) So I told her pickle juice was the digestive juices from cows… I know I’m evil. Now we both LOVE Claussen pickles. I’ve apologized profusely.
Every single time my husband, who I have been with for 10+ years, gets a check at a restaurant he makes a shocked expression, then an “Oh.. my bad” look, flips the check.. then once again makes an even more Shocked expression. I don’t know why.. but I laugh every time.
Haha, so funny!
xo
s
My husband opens the little folder with the check in it, then slams it shut, declaring, “I won’t pay it!”
My dad always asks the server (in a very serious voice) “Do you take cash?” I roll my eyes, but love it as a dad-ism.
I just laughed out loud picturing someone doing this!
my husband does this too! not the flipped part, but the expression. gets me every time!
My husband likes to pretend we aren’t actually together wherever we go. Like when it’s just the two of us at a restaurant, and the server brings the check, he’ll say, “Oh can you split this please.” Or even if we’re with our kids, he’ll say, “I’m on my own check.” When we’re at the grocery store, and we both start loading the stuff onto the conveyer belt, he’ll say very loudly, “Excuse me, ma’am, could you please not put your stuff so close to mine!” It always makes people feel uncomfortable so we laugh!
Hhahahahahaha!
xo
s
Is your license plate really BURGRR? SOOO JEALOUS!
Sadly it’s not anymore! Got a new one a few years back.
xo
s
Let’s see…..besides the usual knocking on wood….my family likes to make fun of me because of a cheer I did in middle school when I was a cheerleader for our middle school basketball team. Ready for the inappropriate lyrics? “Shake it, don’t break, it took nine months to make it….” The cheer goes on. We finally do make reference to “the team.”
Sooooooo inappropriate for a middle school cheerleading squad. However, I have a wall art idea and the main phrase will be “Shake it, don’t break it.” Ha!
Ha!
xo
s
i’m totally borrowing that wall art idea! love the phrase!
you have got to fill us in on the rest of that cheer
I TOTALLY used to assign animals to my teachers in high school! Not even kidding. Actually, my now-brother-in-law used to sit next to each other in biology class and assign them together. Sometimes they were pretty obvious (we had a for sure poodle and polar bear), but some were more hilarious (like the disgruntled duck).
Here is a random confession: Yesterday I made myself a bowl of popcorn while my 2 year old was SUPPOSED to be napping. But when she came out to stall bedtime again, I shoved the whole bowl under a pillow just so I would not have to share :-) And I may have done that several times before, too!
Haha! I hide food from Clara too!
xo
s
I do that, too! I’m so glad I’m not alone. I will confess, one time I hid a bowl of ice cream under my shirt when I was pregnant and pretended to pet the baby. :P
Omg… my husband and i do this all the time. Sometime we don’t even wait until our 3 year old is in bed. Riley will be watching tv or concentrating on something else i will try to get his attention by calling his name and get totally ignored. Then i get some sort of food I don’t want him to have and miraculously he is immediately like ” oh mommy what do you have?”. I guess from now on I need some sort of decoy candy wrapper to get his attention right away.
When I was reading #1, I immediately thought “Box Whiskers Plot”. Which I think is equal to “Venn Diagram” in both dorkiness and awesomeness for a band name. So yes, I do that too.
Hahahahah! Love.
xo
s
lol I’m definitely a “that’s what she said” person too. Someone once told me I look like a baby bear… not sure what that means, but I kinda see it! If you watch the Office, Dwight looks like “Tard the cat”. Google it. That cat is hilariously similar to Dwight.. in looks and personality!
Emily-Jane, I just went to look it up on YouTube and had to laugh because a random Clara and Burger video was listed second on the side bar on the right. How random!?
So random!
xo
s
Oh my word!!!! Your face is my catchphrase!!!!!
I give my dog many, many nicknames.
His name is Hobbes, but he’s also Hobbes Goblin, Gobblin, Monster, Monstrosity, ‘Strosity, Bucket, and Monkey.
He also responds to them all. And I sort of pretend like he listens better when I call him Monster.
Our cat’s name is Mandy, but we call her chichen wichen and I don’t know why… She will answer to either.
My mother renames her cats like you do your dog. She had a cat named Daisy who became Daisy May who became Maisey.
One of my cat’s is named Hobbes and I’m totally stealing Hobbes Goblin.
My dog also has many names and somehow still knows who he is! hahah Here they are! Ruger, Ruger Bug, Bugs, Rugs, Rugsy, Rugsy Boo, Bugger Boo, Boo Boo Kittens (my husband continues to remind me he isnt a kitten haha).. poor dog!
My mom has an orange tabby who came with the name “Flower” when she adopted him. Great male cat name, right? LOL. Somehow it became Fava, then Fava Bean, and now he’s just Bean. At least it had an evolution. We just randomly started calling our terrier/chihuahua mix Puppa or Scooter one day. His name is Emmett. :P
My dog Gracie goes by Monster, too! There is even a canister of dog treats in the car labeled “Monster Treats”
We named our cat Carley, and our nicknames for her are: Carley Fries, Carls Barkely, Carley Sheen, Carley Davidson, Larry, Moe, and Carley, Carley Chaplin, Carlow Richie, and Fat Carls (because she is kind of large.) Most of the time we refer to her simply as Carls.
I’ll bite….as I should be finding something to do with my time other than sitting here…
1. Whenever I see a digital clock, I do math in my brain, always dividing the minutes by the hour.
2. I also think of words in my head that I hear and think of other words that I can make out of it.
3. I have a tendency to get started in a project and not be able to finish it for whatever reason, leaving a big mess for my husband to finish up and interrupt whatever his plans are.
4. I wait around for your post to show up some days. What can I say, I lead a dull, watch the paint dry kind of life.
5. I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up…at the age of 31 with 5 kids…
I do math on the clock too! Only I have to find some way to make the numbers be equal. Doesn’t work for lots of them. Here’s an example: if it says 12:36, I say one times to times three equals six! I am so weird.
1. I also exclaim, “I do what I want!” often.
2. I sing Queen songs in the shower every.single.day…, and typically while playing their Live Aid performance (from before I was born) on my phone.
3. I will now be making name signs to go in my houseplants a la Katie, an above commenter, starting with the ones that don’t grow as fast as others.
Oh! And my favorite one: I play hide and seek from my dogs. I call them from the end of the hallway, and they run into the bedroom, but sometimes I slip into the hall bath or another bedroom….they come looking for me and sometimes I pop out and scare them. It is HILARIOUS. My dog Bear gives what we call the “aw shucks” where he tilts his head sideways and swings one paw up in the air for a shake.
I definitely do the hide and seek with the dog. I can hear him running up and down the stairs looking for me. However, he has gotten clever and now knows where my hiding spot is! Guess I need a new hiding spot!
I play tag with my cat.
Haha, I like to tease my dog too. He totally loves my mother and loves to sit on her lap. If I say “Mummy’s home!!”, he will dash off her lap and jump around at the front door to welcome her in… the very woman he was with two seconds earlier!
As demonstrated at the book signing in DC last night, I like to name inanimate objects (Seymour the sea urchin, Steven the dinosaur lamp, etc.)
Other random things: I would love to be the lead singer of an 80’s cover band and I like Worcestershire sauce on my baked potato.
1. I can flip my eyelids inside out.
2. I am certified to operate a forklift (it was for an old job).
3. I am 29.5 (and married) and still sleep with a teddy bear named Gundie that I was given at birth by my aunt.
4. A good friend of mine plays in the WNBA for Seattle.
5. I REALLY hope my brother made it to WestElm in Chicago to patiently wait in line for ya’ll to sign your book for me:)
I’ve got one for you: I love, love, love Taylor Swift. Like giddy tween love her. I am determined to meet her one day (when she will, of course, want to be my best friend! Ha). Ok maybe I’ve got two for you…I like a few gummy bears in my chocolate frozen yogurt or ice cream. Is that gross?
It was great meeting you last night in DC! Thanks for coming and signing my book!
Oh.em.gee! I love Taylor Swift too!! My sister and I are totally obsessed with her! We have seen her in concert a half dozen times and she even touched my hand once!! We constantly talk about her like she is our real best friend.(I’m 29 and she is 27)
you have another fellow swiftie — 5 concerts in, and i frequently have dreams where her and I are BFFs and hanging out. not TOO weird right???
Probably the most random thing about Brian & I is we write each other notes each day. We are super dorks. We have this notebook that we write how we are feeling, what we are thinking, anything really into and leave it around the house for the other person to read and write back. It’s like passing notes in school – except we are adults and doing it as a way to talk to each other since we don’t see each other much. Nerds.. I know.
That’s really sweet! I was deleting emails from my old email account the other day and realized that I used to send Sherry a good morning email every day when I arrived at work (when I was at my old job). How thoughtful I was back then! :)
-John
That is quite possibly the most adorable thing ever and now I’m pissed my husband isn’t that sweet/thoughtful. I’m going to find a notebook and make him write me a note! ;)
My husband goes to work before I do and makes my coffee every morning, with a sweet “Have a good day” note on top of a clean coffee cup. Then, because I go to bed later than he does, I write him a note back so that he finds it by the coffee pot in the morning. :)
If I named a band it would be The Hudson River Diamond Pickers. Diamond Pickers were the nickname for the kids who were paid to pick horse poo off the ice that was cut on the river and then put into the ice houses waaaay back when.
Also my husband’s redneck catch phrase is “Sure smells like it.” Classy.
This is my new factoid of the day! (I meant about the kids, but appreciate that that sentence could have been followed by a ‘sure smells like it’). Thanks!
My mom has always called me by my middle name (Michelle), but I go by Lauren by everyone else. It’s super confusing because I don’t think a thing of it, but it always throws off my friends and in-laws. Once I even had a friend tell my mom “you know her name is Lauren right?” which quickly lost him all respect as a human being to my mom.
Aww, my sister’s name is Lauren Michelle, too.
My daughter’s name is Lauren Michelle, too.
My family is the SAME way- both my sister and I went by our middle names with family… got even more confusing when I had nephews as they had an uncle aaron (and my family calls me erin) so I am stephany to grown up friends, erin to family and kid friends, and ali to my nephews!! People thought I was TWINS when I was in middle school -so I actually hyphenated the two names together for middle and high school… LOL!
My boyfriend and I do the create a band name all the time, sometimes we get too into it and plan out the albumn names too!
My hubs and I sometimes get in bed at night and begin reviewing the crazy things our daughter said when she was a toddler. One fave, when Dad was preparing the fireplace for the evening, Elizabeth said, “Poke it, Buddy!” Another time (this is awful) Dad was preparing for a colonoscopy (I know, right?!?!). A serviceman came to work on some underground pipes. Elizabeth walked up to him and said, “Have you ever had somebody stick a tube up your butt?” We nearly died, literally, but have laughed our heads off over it ever since!
Oh my goodness. That is awesome.
-John
This is so funny! Kids say the most embarrassing things about parents. One of the teachers at our school just had twins (surprise, she has 4 older ones and they’re at least 6 years older), and her son was in a friend of mine’s class. We were wondering if she had the babies natural or C-Section. So we asked her son, did your mommy have surgery when she had the babies? And the little boy said, no but my daddy’s having surgery on Wednesday.
Thank you for this laugh – this is hilarious!
I am laughing so hard I am crying. This is great, Mary!
We can all agree that the comments on this post are the best ever, right? I mean, it’s killing us. We’re cry laughing.
xo
s
I still totally love Bethenny, too. I haven’t had cable and thus no Bravo in about a year, and Hulu Plus still won’t carry Bravo, so I now only catch her on her talk show when that was on and I follow her on Twitter. She cracks me up.
Sorry, I hate Bethenney Frankel – she looks like The Joker to me. Meh. But I’m with you on the band-naming thing – my favorite is “Skeptical Baby” (named for my son who would cock one eyebrow at us as we made goofy-parent faces at him).
My weird thing – I don’t do eyeballs, as in, if someone has an eye injury, or if they curl their eyelashes, or put contacts in – ewwwww!! I cringe. But in fairness, it was due to an early eye trauma as a child!
Skeptical Baby is amazing. I am totally picturing a photo of said eyebrow-cocked baby as the album cover.
I know it may seem disrespectful to my husband’s mother, but any time one of us says something is cheap, or on sale, or “that was easy”, I always say “like yo mama”. Now, don’t get me wrong…I love my MIL. She is sweet and conservative, and in no way has she EVER represented herself as someone that that would be “paid” for a-hem…if you get my drift…it’s just funny! My husband always follows it up by saying “like yo sista”!
I’m such a English/social sciences person and so NOT a math person that when I “count” in my head while curling my eyelashes, I say the aplphabet in stead of actually counting. Yep.