Five Random Bits

Since it’s Thursday afternoon and we’ve been known to veer off into random territory (like this, this, this, and this), I thought I’d toss another one on the barbie, er, blog. Below are things you probably never knew about me and John. Is it proof of our over-sharing tendencies? Yes. Evidence that we’re more than a little weird? Absolutely. But we just had so much fun with a Ten-Things-You-Didn’t-Know-About-Us post waaay back in 2009…

… that we thought it was high time we broke out this post three years later. So without further ado, some random bits:

1. I’ve always wanted to name a band. Not be in one or marry a rockstar. Just name one. All the time I say something weird and exclaim “that would make a great band name!” My favorite band name brain child: “What Ever Happened To Breckin Meyer?” (said out loud after seeing an old Road Trip trailer). Other favorites: “Exhibit A” and “Venn Diagram.” I know, I know. I’m certifiable. But it’s my idea of a good time. Also, I came up with “Pass The Mustard” last night and I’m kinda into it…

2. We assign babies to correlating animals. In a very very loving way. For example Clara’s a turtle. And a little bird. We see both of those animals in her all the time.We have about a million pictures that we glance at and say “Tuuurtle!” or “It’s The Bird!” She also has cousins who are a chipmunk, a bear, a monkey, and a puppy. Seriously, they all have assigned animals – at least in our heads. Here’s Clara’s “angry bird” face.

3. I know she’s not everyone’s cup of tea (and I might be a little scared if she was), but I’m totally under (as in, in no way over) Bethenny Frankel. I’ve seen every episode of Housewives Of New York, Bethenny Getting Married, Bethenny Ever After and even read her book called A Place Of Yes (I thought hearing about things like almost getting on the regular Apprentice and ending up on the Martha Stewart one were fascinating because there’s lots of behind the scenes stuff). And this next part might be polarizing to admit, but once a few years ago after a particularly good old episode of Housewives of New York I turned to John and said “now I totally understand why people get tattoos of celebrities.” Yikes, right? I just adore her hilarious honesty about herself – and I know some people are over her now, but I’m still on the train. She’s just so quick to confirm that she went crazy or had a lapse of judgment instead of denying it. I think it’s refreshing and I try to use that as my inspiration when I’m feeling defensive. That’s right, Bethenny Frankel is my inspiration. Hey, whatever works, right?

4. Nearly almost every day of Clara’s first six months on this planet she peed on her dad while he changed her diaper. We heard that was only a boy thing, but as soon as the first diaper came off, she just let it flow. And she usually made the face below. Is that not a Dr Evil/Mini-Me face or what? Hilarious. Note: John did not find it as hilarious as I did.

5. John’s favorite comeback (well, maybe second to “That’s What She Said”) is “Your Face.” No matter what someone says. For example, this dialog has actually transpired in our house – Sherry: “Oh man, did you leave that bag out in the car?” John: “Your face.” And for some reason I laugh every time. It’s his catch phrase. And I guess if pressed mine is “I do what I want!” spoken in a faux bratty tone. Even as a response to John asking if I’ll hand him the remote (which I then do and follow up with a pouty “here, but only because I wanted to”). Dorks for life.

Now it’s your turn. Tell me five random things, or at least one, about you. Do you put ketchup on your steak? Sing show-tunes in the shower? Count stairs whenever you’re on them (I totally do that in my head most of the time). Come on guys, let’s have some Thursday afternoon bonding, shall we?

Comments

  1. Kim Christian says

    LOL … “your face” is my husbands go to, staple, comeback. Our typical conversations go about like this, “Me: Do you think I should paint that chair white? My Husband: no, you should paint your face white!” He’s a mess, it makes no sense, but every time he says it I laught like a two year old.

    xoxo

    • says

      Thats exactly what its like in my house too! Julie, we followed that same progression, but it became a last word issue So now it usually goes like this:

      husband: In your face.
      me: In yours.

      Hahaha! I’m glad we’re (sorta) normal!

    • Sarah M. says

      My husband is a little more fixated on the derrière (yes, I just Googled that so I knew how to spell it!) Typical dialog: “Where did you put the car keys?” “Your butt” What do you want to have for dinner?” “Your butt?” “How was your day?” “Your butt”
      Makes 0 sense!

  2. Steph B. says

    What? You count stairs too?? Totally thought I was the only person who did that. Mine are in increments of four – “1, 2, 3, 4…” and then I start over – “1, 2, 3, 4…” until I read the top or bottom of the stairs. (Note: I mostly do this when walking up stairs, not down.) Someone once told me that was a sign of OCD, but I dunno. At least I’m not the only stair-counting OCD lady out there then!

    • Leanne says

      Ha! I love this place! I count stairs too, but only going up. There are lots of loooong escalators in the DC metro that I usually walk up and I usually don’t even realize I’m counting until I hit about 25 or 30.

    • Andi says

      Ack! Me too! In fact, I’ll take multiple steps on one or two stairs so I can end on the landing on four. :)

    • says

      Hahaha! MEE TOO! I count each flight and start over at the next flight…but usually in 4’s and then 5’s (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,5) then on the last flight (which is usually the longest) I go all the way through without starting over.. typically going down but sometimes going up too… I think it has to do with the rhythm that I’m moving… so if I’m tired i typically don’t count going up because I’m moving sluggishly :) I don’t really count much else, though. According to the DSM there has to be more actions of obsessions and compulsions to diagnose OCD… no worries for most of us :)I could give you more details, but you probably don’t want to be bored with those! Because, yes Kristen, We are all a little Sheldon :)

    • Melissa says

      I count stairs-but only going down :) and I count them all in a row :).

      My husband uses the “Your mom” statement–even during a normal conversation his answer is ‘Your mom’ or he’ll walk in to the room & say ‘What’s your mom doing?’ haha

    • DianeG says

      I totally count stairs. I can’t tell you how much it pleases me that there are two sets of 7 steps to get up to our 2nd floor. It didn’t have to be 7, but the fact that it’s even is nice.

      My husband has abbreviated his comeback statement to “Face!”. He uses it the same way someone would say, “Gotcha” or “I told you so.”

  3. Liz O says

    We have a dog named Jobu (pronounced joeboo) and we constantly say his name. Sometimes we answer the phone and just say “Jobu” instead of Hi. We even say “Sweet Jobus” at night instead of sweet dreams. i’m not sure why or how it happened, but it did and it stuck. If Jobu could talk he would tell us we are insane.

    • Steph says

      I’m seriously dying at this, I actually can’t stop lauging. And now I want to name a dog Jobu.
      My best friend and I do this with the brand of toilet, Beamus. I don’t even know why or how this started, but it is oddly comforting to see other people do this, except, you know, with a dog name.

    • Liz O says

      Thanks Everyone! If I start hearing people saying “Jobu” randomly I don’t know what I would! It would be hysterical. #jobu

    • Leah says

      my sister does this with her cat. it’s always funny. Replacing song lyrics with the cat’s name, etc.

    • Liz Orzechowski says

      Leah we do that too! We are always popping Jobu into everything! My husband answered the phone and said it and i laughed and thought of this post!

    • Alisha says

      HAHAHA! Are we airing our idiosyncrasies here? Oh yeah! Let’s get our freak on!!

      1) We totally say our animal’s names (and nicknames) over and over again, too, aaand in different voices! We also talk FOR them and TO them (AND the house plants and the yard plants and the squirrels and rabbits out in the yard) not to mention imitate their actual vocalizations–lots of doggie whimpers, kitty mews & squirrel chitters going on over here! We apparently agree each of our four fur babies has their own “voice” and we can tell whom the other person is “imitating” by the tone they use. Our female kitty is the most persnickety of the bunch so she suffers from perpetual brat voice, our male dog is the youngest (and dumbest) and speaks accordingly.

      2) We also have a LOT of nicknames for each other and take on “roles” or “personalities” (not weird at all, right?!) of our different nicknames based on our moods (Chicken is my bratty/whiny “I do what I want!” face, but Fritzy is most likely to drop a spoonful of ice cream on the couch and get away with it. My husband literally transforms into “Teddy Bear Britches” in his fuzzy pajamas.) and we even give our nicknames nicknames…my husband will call me some combination of “Boo Boo” “Blueberry” “Blue Bird” “Bub Bub” “Boo” “ReRah” “Love Love” or “Lovey” in a PUBLIC PLACE without thinking twice. Love him.

      3)I’m nice to plants and animals and inanimate objects and can get pretty protective of them…Like, seriously riled. As in I once wept for the squirrels when the boys up the street stole their acorns when I was a kid. I somehow got so upset I managed to convince the boys to COLLECT MORE ACORNS to pile at the base of the Squirrel’s tree to apologize. Insane I know. But still to this day I apologize to a plant for bumping into it.

      4) My husband and I are best friends and allow each other to be our own weirdo selves. We work together and spend most of our free time alone together at the house being ridiculous. We sing off-key made-up ballads around the house and do silly dances and make goofy faces just to make the other laugh. Honestly, we just act like kids a lot and don’t judge each other for it. His farts still make me giggle.

      5) I face our can labels and alphabetized the colors of our closet for a change of pace…which is crazy because my husband will never put anything back in the same place!

      So there. My deep dark secrets. Certifiable I know, but I guess I just found the right one to love me!

    • says

      Ha! Hilarious. My husband’s favourite activity is replacing words in songs with our dog’s name (Smidgen). It works best when the song is completely unrelated to dogs and the word being replaced has an entirely different number of syllables to Smidgen.

      Dog owners are weird.

    • says

      Alisha- we totally do your #1… but never in front of other people. Each of our cats has a voice and a personality. We now do it for our 6 month old…though I’m guessing we’ll have to cut it when he catches on and starts talking in cat voices….

  4. Marinn says

    Aww. My husband and I say “your mom” kind of like that. For example.

    ME: This traffic is unbearable.
    HIM: Your mom’s unbearable.

  5. Maureen says

    1.I know I have said this before, but I totally count my steps. Not even just on stairs. EVERYWHERE.

    2.Similar to your “I do what I want”, I like to tell my husband that “I am a grown up and that I can do whatever I want”. hee hee. He likes when I am being whiny/bratty (how many girls can say their husband actually likes that?)

    3.I have an EXTREMELY weird habit of pointing out songs that I feel would be good stripper songs.

    4. My husband and I smell our Basenji’s feet. Yes, I know, weird and maybe gross to some. But they smell like Fritos and we love it.

    5. I have always had a crush on Alan Alda.

    Aren’t you glad you asked? :)

    • Elle says

      I totally thought I was the only person to have a crush on Alan Alda– Wow! I am so relieved not to be alone on that one!!

    • Patricia says

      I used to know a couple who had a dog and they named her something like frita because they said her feet smelled like fritos!!

    • says

      I lurve Alan Alda!!! My hubby got me his autograph for my birthday a few years back (the same birthday we got engaged!) I love M*A*S*H, but now we can BOTH appreciate him on “30 Rock.”

      Although I’ve had an OBSESSION over Peter Tork from the Monkees since I was 13. Like, I used to send him handmade birthday cards every year and make a cake to celebrate with my fellow Monkees fan best friend. Even had a HORRENDOUS bowl cut like his (and this was in the ’90s). Ahhh…it’s good to get that out in the open.

    • Lita says

      We call that Frito smell on our dog’s feet “Feet-o’s” And I totally drop my dog’s name into the theme song for “30 Rock.” It’s just me repeating “Zeke” in time to the song. In my defense, he seems to like it. :)

    • Liz M says

      My puppy’s feet smell like fritos too! My sister noticed this years ago with her lab and I thought it was a fluke. Since then, every dog’s feet that I’ve smelled have smelled like fritos. Wow, that makes me sound like a foot smelling weirdo…I don’t do it to ALL dogs, just the one’s I know. ;)

    • Heather S says

      That is too funny Maureen!! In regards to #3, my husband and I have a yellow lab, and I always call him “Frito Feet” because of the way they smell! My husband thinks I’m nuts, apparently he doesn’t like to smell the dog’s feet…

    • Lindsey says

      Is anyone else concerned not with the fact that our dogs’ feet smell like Fritos, but that Fritos smell like our dogs’ feet?!?!

    • Tara says

      LOL. I totally had to look up the Frito thing. Apparently it’s a known “condition” called Frito Feet. The first site I came across the lady said initially she likened the smell to popcorn and I freaked out because I’ve been telling my husband for the last 4 years that occasionally our dog smells like popcorn. Now I know why! He’s got frito feet. Haha. Anyways, I guess it’s just yeast microbes and it’s totally normal – unless the smell is super strong or overwhelming. Then it could be an infection.

    • Karlee Davidson says

      YES!
      Our cat (Poe) totally smells like Fritos! We usually refer to her as “Frito-Poe” on a daily basis! So strange!

    • Rachel says

      OMG I always say that my dog smells like potato chips, but hers lives in her ears, so I sneak a smell in there basically as often as possible :-) haha, this stuff is hilarious!

    • Chris says

      I don’t even have a pet and I am dying laughing at these frito comments!! I will never eat fritos again without thinking of this!

    • Ali says

      Haha I am always telling my fiancé that our dog smells like white cheddar popcorn!! He does not agree.

    • Elizabeth says

      My husband and I smell our dogs’ feet as well! We also love how our dogs smell a 1-2 weeks after a bath–you know the shampoo smell has worn off but they don’t smell like stinky dog yet. Finally, my husband and I do the “your face” thing as well except we say “your face” and then repeat what the first person said. Like I would say “Honey, can you take out the trash?” He would respond” Your face takes out the trash!” It gets a little out of hand. We also make up songs about our dogs and each other constantly. Some have become long time family favorites.

    • Rose says

      Oh My Gosh,
      i totally think my dogs’ feet smell like stale crackers! I love it! my husband thinks its weird ;)

    • Erin C says

      My favorite Basenji smell is after they’ve been curled up ina ball sleeping…they have amazing “sleepy smell”…can’t think of what it reminds me of but I love it!

    • says

      I know I’m late to the party here, but these comments are killing me! Especially the Frito feet! I don’t even have a dog and I just want to find one and smell it’s feet to see what everyone is talking about. I wonder if my cat will let me smell his paws without scratching the crap out of my nose. hahaha

    • Colleen says

      OMG! I was just talking with a friend about this and we both agreed our dogs smelled like Fritos or tortilla chips. It is nice to see we aren’t alone.

  6. says

    I heart you guys. ;) I do the same “I do what I want!” but only in a Cartman tone. “WHATEVA WHATEVA, I DO WHAT I WANT!”

  7. says

    Random Thing About Us: I used to be the go-to person for relationship advice with my friends- now, since meeting nate, I flat out tell people to not ask me any. My relationship is the 1 in 10 million and should not be held as a standard. People think I’m crazy lol

  8. April says

    I used to assign animals to people all the time. It was a big thing for me in high school. Usually when I was bored and we had to sit in the gym during finals. I would just randomly think, hey that person is totally a horse. I kept this knowledge mostly to myself. LOL

    • Jill says

      My friend’s fiance is and has always been a prairie dog. My other friend’s ex-boyfriend was a muppet.

  9. says

    I name everything… my car, my plants, anything that I interact with on a daily basis. I went so far as to make “name tags” (little signs on toothpicks) to stick in each plant pot. I am convinced that it makes them feel loved and therefore they grow better. I guess this is my version of a green thumb. And my plants, especially Buttonwillow, agrees.

    (Wow… re-reading that, I think I may have a problem).

    • luann says

      thats completely normal… well for me at least. every object has a name and actual people and pets have names and multitudes of nicknames. for example my dog’s name is jeager, which we NEVER call him. he goes by weenie, bubbles, puddles, boo, weenie bear, pooh bear.. etc. and all of the house plants have names. its probably odd that i do this but its even odder that my hubby now does it too. “did you water planty and planty jr?”

    • Ammie says

      Oh good – we’re not the only ones who do this! Owen the oven, Bertha the Fridge (she’s big!), Stevie the TV, Peter the Heater…it’s ridiculous! We were even trapping a rat in our garage and somehow he got named Winston – btw, Winston is dead now…

    • Monika says

      Naming things (Stevie the TV) makes me think of Joey on Friends! We totally do that at my house too :o)

    • says

      Bahahahaha! Ammie, that’s hilarious! I love your names. We have always named our cars and houseplants. The last one was Marley, after Bob because it was a tropical plant.

    • Elise says

      I name everything too!! Our cars, GPS, toaster – I love it! It makes me happy and that’s reason enough to keep up the craziness. The only sad part is when you lose one of them. Last year my car, Alice, was totaled…murdered. A texting teen murdered my Alice. I will always miss her.

      Along naming – I make sure my current and upcoming kid names are scream-able. As in “how does it roll off my tongue as I am yelling for them?” Let’s be honest – it’s an important attribute.

  10. says

    Ok, #5 literally had me dead in my chair because ALL three of your catchphrases are ones I use on the daily. I’ve recently added “Just love me” when people don’t seem to want to do what I demand.

    • says

      I recently adopted Maebe Funke’s “Marry Me.”

      And yeah, I’ve totally been legally married for five years. It’s only awkward about 60% of the time, which is 100% perfect.

    • Kelly says

      I love all the catch phrases too! The one we use is
      BF: “see what im getting at?”
      Me: “I see what you’re throwing down”
      Makes us laugh everytime…

    • Meredith T says

      My husband and I use “Givin’ him the business.” We heard it on ESPN once. The announcer said something like “that tackle gave that qb the business.” It makes me laugh every time, and it works for all occasions.

    • Steph H. says

      Haha! I totally say that to. Especially to my bf when he’s grumpy and doset want to cuddle. We also have taken to calling each other dude all the time. It usually comes out as ‘duuude! Why you doin that?!’…our friends think we’re strange!

  11. says

    I think Honey Boo Boo says “I do what I want.” Or said it. But you should so say it in that voice as I did when I read it.

    I love the random posts!!

  12. Wendy O. says

    I secretly race people. Not in a creepy way. But if I’m walking down the sidewalk, and there’s a person walking down the sidewalk across the street from me, I’ll do whatever I can to beat them to the corner. I don’t know why I do this, but I totally get the “I WON!” excitement and silly grin when I pull it off.