Yup, it’s a rare Sunday post- just because we have an exciting bathroom update to share. I know we mentioned that we’ve had great luck with under-$100 American Standard toilets, but we’re eating those words. Why? Because we just discovered the most amazing toilet that we have ever heard of. It’s like the Jake Gyllenhaal of toilets. As in, there is nothing better. Feast your eyes on this sexpot:
I mean, who wouldn’t want a toilet with:
- a heated seat and heated foot blower
- ambient lighting (right in the bowl!)
- a motion activated lid and seat (it opens and closes for you)
- advanced bidet function
- built in speakers and a remote docking station for playing tunes
- an integrated air dryer (yes, it blows you dry down there)
- a touch screen remote (to control the entire thing like a giant robot)
Now, I know what you’re thinking. That toilet must cost millions, if not tens of thousands of dollars. But get this, it’s under 5K!
And we decided to spring for it! I mean, what’s the point of DIYing day in and day out without a little heated seat and air drying action to get you through the rough spots? This toilet is a guaranteed everyday morale boost. Because after a long day of painting or sledgehammering, how good does it sound to retreat to a heated toilet that has ambient bowl lighting and plays our favorite tunes while we use the remote to activate the air dry function?
I mean, just look how gorgeous it looks in this all glass room overlooking a city. I’ve always wanted an all glass bathroom.
Wait for it…
I know, I know, you were probably onto us. What tipped you off? Was it the ambient bowl light? The price tag? The Sunday post (darn you April Fool’s day for being on Sunday!). You guys know us too well.
Psst- Anyone else think it’s funny that a $4,600 toilet doesn’t qualify for free shipping?
Psssst- When it comes to April Fool’s jokes, they’re kind of a tradition around these parts. Here’s last year’s, the year before that, and the year before that.
It was the look of this fabulous toilet. Seen the picture I knew right away something was not right :)
I knew it the second a Sunday post showed up!
I also ran a April Fools Day post today:
http://thenonconsumeradvocate.com/2012/04/my-tv-show/
Although . . . I do have to say the toilet does sounds rather fantastic. I’m going to Japan in a couple of weeks and am secretly excited to try out the fancy-schmancy toilets.
Katy
Hahahaha, such a good one! I loved the part about stuff being in your contract. Haha.
xo,
s
Ha! I was just thinking, “Man, I really love my seat warmer…” I live in Japan, and now that I have a fancy-schmancy toilet, I’m ruined for life. The auto-flush is also quite amazing.
Katy, have a nice trip!
-Angela
Ha ha! It might be worth $5k if it could potty train a toddler too ;)
Happy April!
“like” We will have a two-year-old in ten days. Definitely thinking about this!!! (potty training, not $5K toilets)
It would be a huge bummer to drop the remote in the toilet. (Not to mention, who wants to touch the potty remote?!)
Aaaah, you guys do not disappoint.
touching the potty remote wouldn’t be a big deal, as the bidet and drying features leave you hands-free! That’s why you need the itunes- because you just sit there, and it does your business for you!
You should check out http://www.thinkgeek.com today. They have the BEST April Fool’s products. Some of their jokes do get turned into actual products too.
Bwahahahaha- hilarious! Hungry hungry hippos for the iPad had me dying.
xo,
s
Love It!! I actually saw this in a bathroom on bang for your buck one time and the homeowner went on and on about how it was the best money he ever spent!! Way to keep the April fool’s tradition rolling on!
I bet it was the heated foot blower that made the homeowner feel this way because it’s definitely what sold me! Hahaha – who comes up with this stuff?!
At first I was:
“hum…err…(shrugs)ok, if they want it…”
And then:
“Air dryer” came up.
(I proceed to picture the scene)
And that’s when I lost it haha.
Thank god!
Haha, even before I got to the end I was like…this is a great April Fools post!
LOL Funny! Who wouldn’t want a $5000 toilet. Happy April =)
The lighting tipped me off and then the bidet sealed it. :)
Ha!!! I saw this toilet on HGTV a few weeks back. How funny. You got me. You got me.
Maybe the fact that it doesn’t qualify for free shipping is their way of celebrating April fool’s. That’s nuts! Let’s hope joke is on us there….errrr whoever DOES spend 5k on a toilet.
It was the term, “sexpot,” Sherry! That totally gave it away for me. It seemed a little over-the-top for a toilet compliment…though you never know…!
Happy weekend!
Erin
Yes! It was that word that made me go “Hmmmm” and then it was all downhill from there!
I had a similar potty at my hotel in Japan and I’m not going to lie — it was pretty awesome.
Haha, so fancy!
xo,
s
I was TOTALLY overwhelmed by the Japanese toilets, both the ones like this that make you feel like it’s Star Trek, and the ones where you have to squat over the hole in the ground!
nice work! I can’t imagine you guys ever spending that much on a throne! ;) but the list of features and that touchscreen were solid gold. Did John work up the home depot ad and the toilet design, because those are some skills right there! Have a great 1 April!
Haha, it’s actually a real screen shot! This toilet exists! I can’t wait to someday meet one (maybe in a fancy hotel someday?).
xo,
s
Is this the furture!? I am soo underprepared!
Hahahahahaha. Me too.
xo,
s
you need to try harder to fool us :) We know you too well.
Hahaha. I love it. Last year for Christmas I convinced my husband that I bought him an electric lawn mower (which is extra awful because our yard is so big that you’d have to stop and charge it half-way through). Let’s just say that he was really excited to see a kayak in the garage instead. I might just have to steal this idea for next year. Love you guys!
Haha, that’s too funny.
xo,
s
Oh no!!! I do think you deserve a throne like that, seriously. You got me thinking!! I just painted the vanity in our bathroom upstairs and thought a fancy schmanzy toilet would look great!
No word of a lie my mother in law has a toilet similar to that! The Toto Brand, and its automatic bidet function violated me the one and only time I ever used it. Scary stuff hahaha and not worth what it likely cost!
Oh man- automatic bidet?! They need to warn you! Haha.
xo,
s
I’ve been waiting all day to see if you guys went ahead and did an April Fool’s post even though it’s Sunday! So glad you did!
I knew it was an April Fool’s post as soon as I saw the first picture stating the toilet was by Kohler. ;)
I know the toilet is expensive – but in Asia, everyone uses electronic toilets. And actually … they’re AWESOME. If you were really interested, they actually sell these at asian stores. Under $1k ;-)
No way! Someone needs to buy them up and bring them over and sell them at that price here!
xo,
s
I used a Toto when I was in Japan and it was awesome! At the hotel, in the public area, the toilet actually played music to cover up the ‘tinkle’ sound….LOL. We checked it out when we got home, you can buy the toilet seat with the built in bidet for around $800.
Haha, I love the “modesty music” thing.
xo,
s
Actually, they sell these at asian stores, in the US (like California or check your local H-mart!). My mother in law in Cali has one =P. But when we tried the one at my uncle’s house when we visited him in S. Korea last year, I swore we would get one someday. :-D
Hahaha. I knew as soon as I saw the picture. I was like, “What?! That isn’t their taste!”
The hubs and I had talked about doing a “we’re pregnant!” joke today, but both of us forgot. In retrospect, probably for the best. :-)
I have pulled that same joke on the parents and in-laws for the past 4 years. This year was the first my predictable April Fools joke failed – because we actually are pregnant. Lol.
Ive been waiting for this post to show up. I new as soon as I saw the post come up what it was.
You got me, but then again that is an ugly toilet in my opinion!
Man!!! You totally got me! I was thinking, “Wow what in the world happened to John and Sherry? I don’t think I can read this blog anymore if they are springing for a $4,600 TOILET!!!!” I sighed and laughed in relief when I saw it was a joke! Sorry for the unfaithful thoughts! I love y’all! :)
Haha, thanks Christina! We’re just happy we got someone!
xo,
s
Ha! Have you seen this week’s episode of New Girl? (if you even watch that show) Jess was getting attacked by a Japanese toilet and I may have wet myself a little as I died of laughter.
I put blue food coloring in my husband’s tooth brush bristles last night. Which again had me laughing a little too hard as he looked in the mirror.
Happy Fools Day!
Hahah, we have a few saved up episodes to catch up on the ol’ DVR. Can’t wait.
xo,
s
That is immediately what I thought of when I read this!! Six happy faces! AAAHHH!!!
hahaha…I was just going to say – “Jess, I’ve never gone past 3 smiley faces!”
New Girl has my hubs and I dying laughing every week! So good.
YESSSSS!!!!
I actually knew it this time, as soon as I saw the Sunday post.. you got me last year and I haven’t trusted you since. :D
I COMPLETELY fell for this! Too funny! You were so convincing in your reasons for buying it that I was wondering how I could talk my husband into one!
You actually had me fooled for a brief, brief second… until I remembered what day it is today — I just thought you’d lost your collective minds!! (PS — Why would anyone want a light inside the bowl?!? Eeeeewwwww!!!!!!!!)
April Fool’s! The ambient lighting inside the bowl was what tipped me off first. haha :)
i was giggling all the way through reading this, and the bathroom made of all glass put me over the edge to full out laugh/snorts.
happy april 1st!
Ha, good one guys! ;) Happy Fools Day. I’ve stayed at a swanky hotel where the toilet actually had a heated seat and a lighting under the seat. Strange but weirdly fun.
Haha, sounds so fancy!
xo,
s
For me, it was ‘sexpot’. Not even you guys would stoop that low in the pun world.
Ok Sherry, for a minute I thought WHAT…….even went back to top to see WHO posted this. LOL That is a very scary toilet. What bothers me is the fact that someone would spend that much money, OR time on a toilet. Why would you waste time listening to music on the toilet. LOL LOL too funny.
I think I’ll skip the fancy loo, but I’d take Jake Gyllenhaal any day!
Got burned last year, so I was expecting it this year.
Haha, nice Mary! I love how folks that we got last year have learned not to trust us. Haha.
xo,
s
I want to talk to someone who really has that toilet in thier house and ask them if it was worth it. Sounds crazy to me!
You called the toilet a sexpot. Awesome.
I bought it hook, line, and sinker! Until you put the overlooking the city picture. Then I remembered what day it was. Good one guys!!
HA HA HA!! when i saw the price I was like “huh!” and then thought is it April Fool’s Day?!
Funny!!
It’s such an ugly toilet. I knew you guys wouldn’t put something that atrocious in your home! ;)
You totally had me — I’m so gullible! I was thinking that is so crazy to spend that on a toilet when they’ve worked their *tails* off to save money, redo their kitchen, hand stamp Clara’s closet, etc. I was nothing less than stunned! :)
I thought you were going to say you found one on CL for a good deal and went for it. When you wrote that you were going to pay retail I knew it was a joke. Too funny! But I wonder if you can use one of those fancy functions for diaper cleaning? :)
Haha, it’s true! I bet the “wand” would come in handy for diaper spraying!
xo,
s
You had me until you called it the Jake Gyllenhaal of toilets and since I had just watched Love and Other Drugs with Jake Gyllenhaal, I couldn’t imagine what the heck the Jake Gyllenhaal of toilets meant, and then it hit me. It’s April Fool’s Day!
Okay, you had me fooled! I was really bummed because I thought you were taking your blog in a new direction (right down the toilet). I couldn’t believe you thought this was right for your home. Then I got to the end and was SO relieved!! Well played….well played!!
bahaha the second I saw the photo I was like “yep, April fools” Haha. Nice!
I read the title and totally thought you guys were just as excited as I was for the Game of Thrones premiere (before I read the post).
Funny you should mention this toilet. My father-in-law actually has one! But, I must admit, I’m too scared to use it. I think it’s all the gadgets. I fear it might rebel and do something random at any point while I’m sitting there!
Haha, I’d be intimidated of breaking it and having to pay for a new one! Hah. That’s my luck!
xo,
s
It was the price tag..and the fact it’s a Saturday April 1st post that tipped me off. :D I thought even if you guys happened to have won the Mega Millions lottery, you still wouldn’t buy that ugly toilet. haha!
I didn’t get anyone today, mainly because I completely forgot it was April 1st. That said, my common sense pranked me today. We were sawing lumber and the driver of the tractor picking up the log stopped so I walked between two logs to choke it up and he didn’t see me (he was watching my husband) and he moved…and it rolled the log and pinched my leg between two logs just below the knee.
It was like my common sense played a huge april fools joke on me because I KNOW to NEVER walk between two logs under any circumstance. Between my lapse and the driver not seeing me it was pretty funny. I just sat there staring at my leg and looking at him and it was slowly dawning on me I couldn’t move my leg. Then my husband saw what happened and yelled for the guy to back up. The driver felt so so so so bad.
I didn’t break anything but son of a bee sting, there’s definitely some bruising going on.
Now I will REALLY never walked between two logs.
Though, I did keep joking with my husband I could now say I’ve been personally involved in a logging accident. He just rolled his eyes at me.
Oh man, so scary and so glad you’re ok. You crack me up with the logging accident talk. John would roll his eyes at me too!
xo,
s