Over the years of jabbering on about house stuff I occasionally get questions about my family. How many siblings I have, how I grew up, etc. I always say it was a somewhat un-traditional childhood… in the best possible way. I was raised by my mom and dad, who split up when I was very young (a few years after my younger brother Daniel was born) so we just had two houses and bounced happily between them.
I remember when a kid at school once teased me for having divorced parents and I put the “I have two houses and you only have one and I get double the holiday presents” spin on it. Looking back, it was a moment of pure genius. Haha. No more teasing.
I also grew up with my half brother Adam, who was born after my dad married my step mom Nina a while later (he was 11 years younger than me). You might remember him from his cameo in the most embarrassing moment ever caught on film when I was 17.
But I always say I’m the oldest of five – and the only girl. So where do the other two fit in? Well, my Aunt Kay Kay (as we lovingly call my mom’s sister) and her two sons named David and Darius actually moved in with us when my brother and I were very young (my brother was 3 and I was 6). My mom is one of seven children, and while many of my aunts and uncles lived closer, Aunt Kay Kay and her kids used to live in Maryland, so we didn’t get to see our cousins very often, who were 2 and 4 at the time when they moved in… which was just one of about a million reasons we were SO excited for them to move in with us.
My aunt had been diagnosed with a craptastic disease called Multiple Sclerosis, so raising all four of us under one roof with my mom was a way that my mom could lend a hand to my aunt and also a way that my aunt could help us. My mom’s an attorney, and back in those days she was working her buns off to make partner at her firm, so she often got home late. So it was great to come home to my aunt after school, and on most nights she cooked us dinner and helped us with our homework. It was kind of a crazy house with four kids so close in age (four kids born within five years), but growing up with them honestly made me who I am today. Here’s my Aunt Kay Kay with me and my cousin David in the pool when we were little. Isn’t she beautiful?
My aunt was always laughing. She was “the nice one” while I, being the oldest of all the boys, proudly wore my title as “the bossy one.” My brother was “the smart one,” my cousin Darius was “the funny one,” my cousin David was “the crazy one,” and my mom was “the strict one.” So you can guess that when it came down to asking an adult if we could do something… well, we’d usually ask my aunt before my mom.
It was an odd little madhouse, but it was our madhouse and we loved it. So when people ask me how many siblings I have, I usually just say that I’m the oldest of five, and the only girl. But for those who have time for more details, I explain that my total includes one brother, one half brother, and two cousins who grew up under one roof with us like they were our brothers. We had all sorts of adventures over the years – from building forts in the woods to epic sock fights (don’t ask) and karate tournaments in New York City (that’s Darius on the left, me next to him, Daniel second from the right, and David on the right). We kicked some booty that day.
My aunt battled with her multiple sclerosis like a champ. Always smiling and making jokes. Always working hard to stay mobile. First she walked with a cane, then a walker, then a wheelchair, and for the last ten years or so she has been bedridden. Didn’t stop her from smiling (most notably when we stuck Burger or Clara in her bed – that always made her giggle). Strongest, bravest and sweetest woman I know.
Yesterday she passed away. It was a very very sad day. So although this might sound like a bummer of a post, I wrote it because I always wanted to remember how amazing and life-changing it was to grow up with such an awesome lady in my life. And I want Clara to be able to read about her Great Aunt Kay Kay someday. She could light up a room then, and thinking about her now brings a smile to my face. Just picturing us all gathered around the breakfast table fills me with nostalgia.
We’ll be back this afternoon with some regular DIY-related fare. In the meantime, feel free to tell/call/text/email/skype the ones you love. Family is such a blessing. And I’m so thankful for the one I got.
Roxanne M says
I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with your family. I know that you have a guardian angel now, watching over you always. Take care of yourself.
Pendy says
What a lovely tribute to your aunt AND your childhood.
Lindsey @ A Pear to Remember says
Sherry, what a lovely tribute to your aunt. Thank you for sharing about your family, it’s a credit to the amazing family you have now made for yourself. Wishing you and your mom and your entire family comfort and love.
Pendy says
What a lovely tribute to your aunt AND your childhood.
Lindsey @ A Pear to Remember says
Sherry, what a lovely tribute to your aunt. Thank you for sharing about your family, it’s a credit to the amazing family you have now made for yourself. Wishing you and your mom and your entire family comfort and love.
laura says
So, sorry about your loss. Your post made me tear up. But it also made me realize something. I have been separated from my husband for 7 months today. No divorce yet, but it is going to happen. I still don’t want it and it kills me to think of my son coming from a broken home and always being bounced around, back and forth. But your post made me realize that his life will still be good and it’s probably not as bad as I think it’s going to be. My thoughts and prayers go out to you. God bless. :)
Daffodil says
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, Sherry. Thank you for sharing your memories of your aunt — what poetic and touching reminder that loving someone so much is truly a beautiful gift.
bridget b. says
Sorry to hear about your aunt! She sounds like an amazing lady.
Nicole says
Aww Sherry I’m so sorry for your loss. What great memories to cherish of her! In the third picture down – I thought for sure it was a photo of your mom! And wow – you as a child and Clara look identical!!
Much love!
Nicole
Pendy says
What a lovely tribute to your aunt AND your childhood.
Tovah says
This was a beautiful post and I am so sorry for your loss. Hold your wonderful memories close as you grieve, and don’t be afraid to lean on your loved ones. I’ll be praying for you and your family.
Roxanne M says
I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with your family. I know that you have a guardian angel now, watching over you always. Take care of yourself.
Jen says
What a touching, yet sad post. My heart goes out to you in this time of loss but I am inspired by the positivity of your post.
I also grew up between two households, one with my Mother, my brother and myself and the other with my Dad, Step-Mom, three step-sisters, half-brother and half-sister. I prefer just to say brothers and sisters, though. Your love is just the same, whether or not you have the same parents. I also believe that growing up in an unconventional household results in everyone seeming like family and I see this in the way you approach your blog.
Thanks for being so open and inspirational.
Mel says
I am so sorry for your loss, and that of your siblings/cousins. This is a wonderful post and a loving memory of her, and though I didn’t know her, I can only imagine that she would have loved it, and I’m sure she was and will continue to be proud of you, and glad she had a hand in who you are today.
You all are in my thoughts and prayers.
Rebecca @ the lil house that could says
Sherry I’m so sorry. This gave me goosebumps and made me teary eyed! Sounds like she was an amazing woman.
Ashley says
I am so sorry for your loss Sherry. Thank you for sharing your story with us all. It was very touching and quite a reality check. I too come from a divorced home and love the fact that my family isn’t traditional. Family is the people around you that love and support you. It doesn’t necessarily have to only be your mom, dad, and siblings. It can be so much more and I think your story summed it up really nicely.
Thank you!
laura says
So, sorry about your loss. Your post made me tear up. But it also made me realize something. I have been separated from my husband for 7 months today. No divorce yet, but it is going to happen. I still don’t want it and it kills me to think of my son coming from a broken home and always being bounced around, back and forth. But your post made me realize that his life will still be good and it’s probably not as bad as I think it’s going to be. My thoughts and prayers go out to you. God bless. :)
Andrea says
I am so sorry Sherry. But I think this post was beautiful and it will be great to have Clara read later. You are very lucky to have grown up with such a beautiful family.My thoughts are with you and your family.
Ashley says
I am so sorry for your loss Sherry. Thank you for sharing your story with us all. It was very touching and quite a reality check. I too come from a divorced home and love the fact that my family isn’t traditional. Family is the people around you that love and support you. It doesn’t necessarily have to only be your mom, dad, and siblings. It can be so much more and I think your story summed it up really nicely.
Thank you!
Mel says
I am so sorry for your loss, and that of your siblings/cousins. This is a wonderful post and a loving memory of her, and though I didn’t know her, I can only imagine that she would have loved it, and I’m sure she was and will continue to be proud of you, and glad she had a hand in who you are today.
You all are in my thoughts and prayers.
No Biggie says
Sherry, John and Clara — I am so sorry for your loss, but glad you got to spend wonderful time with Kay Kay while you had her. Best wishes …
caroline says
So sad. My aunt has got MS and is in a wheelchair most of the time now. I can’t bear to imagine what our family will go through when she leaves us. Why does it always happen to the most special people in our lives?
Sending big hugs your way
Linda J says
I am so sorry for your loss Sherry. My prayers are with your entire family. You wrote such a lovely tribute to her.
Your Aunt sounds like an extraordinary person in your life.
Thanks for sharing this with your Blog family. Blessings
and love to you!!!
betty in munich says
I am so sorry for your loss. But what a beautiful tribute you wrote to your Aunt and to family. Off to call my 91 year old Mom….
Jen R. says
So very sorry for your loss, but so very happy for the life she led. Thinking of you and your family.
Jen R. says
So very sorry for your loss, but so very happy for the life she led. Thinking of you and your family.
jodi says
So very sorry for your loss. MS truly is a craptacular disease. Sending lots of love to you & your family.
Sarah says
Condolences for you and your family.
Heather B. says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. Sending thoughts and prayers to your family.
Jenny says
Best wishes to you and your (large, exuberant, untraditional) family, Sherry. You are so amazingly lucky to have had your aunt so close in your life, and she to have you. Thank you for sharing her memory in such a positive way — surely an inheritance of the positive outlook on life that she must have had.
Mel says
I am so sorry for your loss, and that of your siblings/cousins. This is a wonderful post and a loving memory of her, and though I didn’t know her, I can only imagine that she would have loved it, and I’m sure she was and will continue to be proud of you, and glad she had a hand in who you are today.
You all are in my thoughts and prayers.
Leigh-Anne says
My prayers are with you and your family. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful testimony of an obviously amazing aunt.
caroline says
So sad. My aunt has got MS and is in a wheelchair most of the time now. I can’t bear to imagine what our family will go through when she leaves us. Why does it always happen to the most special people in our lives?
Sending big hugs your way
Gabriella @ Our Life In Action says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. Last May I lost my father. I never realized what hurt and pain truly was until that day. Every day I think of him, every day I talk to him, and every day I cherish every second I have with all of my family.
You and your family are in my prayers.
Courtney says
So sorry for your loss.
Kimberly says
Sherry, thank you for sharing your story. It’s always nice to not feel alone in the “I grew up differently from my friends” club! And I’m so very sorry for your and your family’s loss. I know it’s hard to lose someone you love, no matter the circumstances.
Lauren says
Sherry, So sorry to hear about Aunt Kay Kay. She sounds like a wonderful woman! Just think, now she’s looking down on you and she’s totally pain free. (She’s probably doing backflips). Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this time.
Jennifer says
I’m so very sorry to hear about your loss. She sounds like a very lovely woman.
Joanna says
What a fitting tribute to your Aunt – I’m sure Clara will treasure the memories in years to come.
My thoughts are with you all.
Meredith says
1) Whoa, do your mom and her sister look alike!
2) I’m so sorry for your loss.
3) My aunt died in May after struggling with her health for years; it’s very hard. Please take care of yourself and your family at this tough time. What a lovely childhood it looks like you had and what a blessing to have such an unconventional family. Sending you lots of love at this tough time.
Lauren says
Sherry, So sorry to hear about Aunt Kay Kay. She sounds like a wonderful woman! Just think, now she’s looking down on you and she’s totally pain free. (She’s probably doing backflips). Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this time.
Sara says
So much love to you all during this time. And thank you for sharing your story and shining such a beautiful light on the ones you love.
Sarah says
Beautiful memories Sherry. Deepest sympathies and love to you and your family during this time. Your Aunt was gorgeous, looks just like your Mom :)
Katie says
So sorry to read of your loss. My thoughts will be with you and your family today!
Gabriella @ Our Life In Action says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. Last May I lost my father. I never realized what hurt and pain truly was until that day. Every day I think of him, every day I talk to him, and every day I cherish every second I have with all of my family.
You and your family are in my prayers.
Karen says
I’m so sorry, Sherry. From these pictures it’s so easy to see where you got your beautiful smile and your own ability (I assume…;) ) to light up a room with it. You two look so much alike.
It looks like a fantastic way to grow up. Thanks for letting us see a little bit of it.
holly | bijou lovely says
So sorry for your loss Sherry! Such a beautiful post about your family, I’m sure Clara will love reading it someday! :)
ColleenwithMurals&More says
So very sorry, Sherry. When I saw the title of this post, I had a feeling where it was going and I almost clicked away. I’m glad I didn’t. My husband had one sister, one brother and two of his cousins were raised with them as brothers. Your post reminded me of that. Your post also reminded me to remember the fun, the love, the laughter.
My husband died unexpectedly May 14. Whether it’s a longterm illness, an elderly relative, or your best friend, it’s so very, very hard. Thank you for this post and triggering some memories I hadn’t thought about for a while. ?
YoungHouseLove says
I’m so so sorry for your loss Colleen.
xo,
s
Jenny says
Sherry, so sorry for your loss. My dad has had MS for about 20 years. He has been relatively lucky with his MS. But this is a reminder of just how terrible this disease is.
Gabriella @ Our Life In Action says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. Last May I lost my father. I never realized what hurt and pain truly was until that day. Every day I think of him, every day I talk to him, and every day I cherish every second I have with all of my family.
You and your family are in my prayers.