Over the years of jabbering on about house stuff I occasionally get questions about my family. How many siblings I have, how I grew up, etc. I always say it was a somewhat un-traditional childhood… in the best possible way. I was raised by my mom and dad, who split up when I was very young (a few years after my younger brother Daniel was born) so we just had two houses and bounced happily between them.
I remember when a kid at school once teased me for having divorced parents and I put the “I have two houses and you only have one and I get double the holiday presents” spin on it. Looking back, it was a moment of pure genius. Haha. No more teasing.
I also grew up with my half brother Adam, who was born after my dad married my step mom Nina a while later (he was 11 years younger than me). You might remember him from his cameo in the most embarrassing moment ever caught on film when I was 17.
But I always say I’m the oldest of five – and the only girl. So where do the other two fit in? Well, my Aunt Kay Kay (as we lovingly call my mom’s sister) and her two sons named David and Darius actually moved in with us when my brother and I were very young (my brother was 3 and I was 6). My mom is one of seven children, and while many of my aunts and uncles lived closer, Aunt Kay Kay and her kids used to live in Maryland, so we didn’t get to see our cousins very often, who were 2 and 4 at the time when they moved in… which was just one of about a million reasons we were SO excited for them to move in with us.
My aunt had been diagnosed with a craptastic disease called Multiple Sclerosis, so raising all four of us under one roof with my mom was a way that my mom could lend a hand to my aunt and also a way that my aunt could help us. My mom’s an attorney, and back in those days she was working her buns off to make partner at her firm, so she often got home late. So it was great to come home to my aunt after school, and on most nights she cooked us dinner and helped us with our homework. It was kind of a crazy house with four kids so close in age (four kids born within five years), but growing up with them honestly made me who I am today. Here’s my Aunt Kay Kay with me and my cousin David in the pool when we were little. Isn’t she beautiful?
My aunt was always laughing. She was “the nice one” while I, being the oldest of all the boys, proudly wore my title as “the bossy one.” My brother was “the smart one,” my cousin Darius was “the funny one,” my cousin David was “the crazy one,” and my mom was “the strict one.” So you can guess that when it came down to asking an adult if we could do something… well, we’d usually ask my aunt before my mom.
It was an odd little madhouse, but it was our madhouse and we loved it. So when people ask me how many siblings I have, I usually just say that I’m the oldest of five, and the only girl. But for those who have time for more details, I explain that my total includes one brother, one half brother, and two cousins who grew up under one roof with us like they were our brothers. We had all sorts of adventures over the years – from building forts in the woods to epic sock fights (don’t ask) and karate tournaments in New York City (that’s Darius on the left, me next to him, Daniel second from the right, and David on the right). We kicked some booty that day.
My aunt battled with her multiple sclerosis like a champ. Always smiling and making jokes. Always working hard to stay mobile. First she walked with a cane, then a walker, then a wheelchair, and for the last ten years or so she has been bedridden. Didn’t stop her from smiling (most notably when we stuck Burger or Clara in her bed – that always made her giggle). Strongest, bravest and sweetest woman I know.
Yesterday she passed away. It was a very very sad day. So although this might sound like a bummer of a post, I wrote it because I always wanted to remember how amazing and life-changing it was to grow up with such an awesome lady in my life. And I want Clara to be able to read about her Great Aunt Kay Kay someday. She could light up a room then, and thinking about her now brings a smile to my face. Just picturing us all gathered around the breakfast table fills me with nostalgia.
We’ll be back this afternoon with some regular DIY-related fare. In the meantime, feel free to tell/call/text/email/skype the ones you love. Family is such a blessing. And I’m so thankful for the one I got.
Amanda N says
I am so sorry for you loss! She sounds like an amazing lady we would all be very lucky to know. Thanks for sharing her story (and yours) with us. Also, as a divorced mom with 2 kids and another one on the way with my new husband, I always explain to my boys that everyone’s family is a different shape and size, and that doesn’t make it better or worse, just different. Love is what is most important. You have such a beautiful family Sherry! My thoughts and prayers are with your family.
Abbie says
So sorry, Sherry. This was a beautiful tribute to your beautiful Aunt.
Christine says
I am so sorry for your loss, but so pleased that you have such wonderful memories of her and your life growing up. That is a blessing.
Holly says
I’m so sorry for your loss, Sherry. At least you have some wonderful memories to look back on! She sounds like she was a amazing woman.
Lindsay McGowan says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. What a touching post about your family, and I know that it will mean so much to Clara someday. I will be thinking of your family during this time.
Melissa says
Sherry-that was a beautiful post about your Aunt. God bless her and your family.
christina says
Thank you so much for sharing, you and John do such a wonderful job letting us into your lives in good times and in bad. What awesome memories. So very sorry for your loss Sherry, sounds like she was an amazing woman.
Hope Arroyo says
What a beautiful tribute to your aunt, Clara is blessed to come from such a wonderful legacy of strong and beautiful women! Our prayers are with you and your family today!!
Sheri says
Sherry, I’m so sorry for your loss. You aunt sounds like an amazing woman. She obviously rubbed off on you.
Sarah says
I’m so sorry for your loss Sherry!! My Grandmother passed away 2 weeks ago and even though you prepare yourself for it, it doesn’t make it any easier. I hope you have some comfort today just thinking about all the wonderful memories you have of her! What an awesome lady she must have been!
YoungHouseLove says
So sorry for your loss Sarah. Thinking about you and your fam.
xo,
s
Allyn says
You just made me get all choked up at work! I’m so so sorry for your loss. I lost my grandmother three weeks ago, and it was EXTREMELY sudden. Like, my husband and I frantically drove back to my hometown and made it to her bed about 30 minutes before she died sudden.
As I told my 7 year old niece, while we’re sad for us, we’re happy for my grandmother, because we would hate to have seen her hurt (she had JUST that morning discovered that she had cancer through most of her body, so it could have been very long and painful). I know that’s part of what you’re feeling too.
I’m so not through the grieving process yet, but the only thing I can say is just to take it as it comes. Tears are not a bad thing.
Sending you a virtual hug!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw thanks Allyn. So sorry for your loss!
xo,
s
YoungHouseLove says
Aw thanks Allyn. So sorry for your loss!
xo,
s
Misty @ The Family Math says
I’m so sorry to hear about your aunt, Sherry. This is a wonderful post and tribute to her and your loved ones.
Melanie says
I am so sorry for your loss Sherry! She seemed like an amazing woman. I’ll be thinking of you guys today! Thank you for sharing such an amazing story.
Sarah @ { rad: renovations are dirty } says
Your post is so beautiful and a perfect memorial for your dear Aunt. I’m so sorry for your loss.
teresa says
Beautiful post Sherry. So sorry for your loss. She sure sounds like an amazing woman. Keep those strong, happy memories alive!
Val says
So sorry for your loss. What a wonderful tribute to your aunt. Your parents and aunt did a wonderful job raising such a smart, loving, independent young woman.
Karen says
Lump in throat. Thinking of you all xxx
Emily says
I love the way you define your family. I’m sorry for the loss of your aunt. She sounds like a remarkable lady!
Tanya from Dans le Townhouse says
I’m so sorry for your loss. But how lovely to have had her in your life. She sounds like an amazing woman. What a lovely way to remember her.
Danielle says
Beautiful post, Sherry. Thanks for the reminder about family and sorry for your loss. Hug your fam tight; it always makes me feel better.
Amanda C says
So sorry for your loss Sherry. Thinking of you and your entire family.
Monika says
So sorry for your loss.
Emily says
Thank you for writing this. I feel like I kind of know her now. I wish I had. I’m so very sorry about your Aunt Kay Kay.
Prayers for you and your family.
Vintanthromodern says
Thanks for sharing, Sherry. I’m glad that you felt you could let us, your extended internet family, support you in your loss. So much of what people blog about is finely crafted perfection – so I’m glad you felt courageous enough to show us that bloggers are real people! Your aunt was like a second mother to you and she fought a long battle – what a fantastic way to honor her!
The Mrs @ Success Along the Weigh says
Thinking of you and your family in this difficult time. She sounded like an awesome lady and a wonderful role model!
Alison says
I’m so sorry for your loss Sherry and family. Your Aunt sounds like she was an absolute joy to have known and loved. What a privilege to have grown up with such a special lady. My thoughts and prayers go out to you.
Stefani says
Sherry,
This is such a beautiful post. Tears still running down my face as I write this!
I sometimes (often?) worry about my untraditional family that I’m starting out with – my husband has a son from a previous marriage, so I have a 6 year old step son, and our baby girl is due in September, so she’ll have an older half brother who we currently have every other weekend plus 4 weeks during the summers.
And I worry that it’s not normal or typical and it makes me sad that we don’t just simply have our very own kids like you have only Clara because step parenting and divorce can make everything so much more complicated and stressful!! But reading your post gave me so much hope that happy families and childhoods come in all forms! Thank you!
Krys72599 says
Stefani, I’m a stepmom and you know what? My two stepkids ARE my “very own kids.” They are 34 and 32 and have been in my life since they were 12 and 10. It is much more normal and typical than it used to be and your daughter will be lucky to have two great parents and an awesome big brother, I’m sure! Just love them both and you’ll have one happy family!
Stefani @ Try To Enjoy says
Thanks Krys – glad to hear that :-)
Deb D. says
Thanks for sharing and thinking of you and your family at this time while you celebrate the memory of your aunt.
amyks says
Sad for your loss, but that was such a lovely post…you are lucky to have had 2 strong women in your life.
Lu says
Oh Sherry, I’m so sorry about such a profound loss. Please take all the time in the world to be with your family to celebrate her life and mourn. God definitely blessed you with an amazing family.
Michele says
What a lovely post. My condolences on your loss. Your aunt (and family) sound amazing.
Cora says
Sherry, my condolences to you and your whole family. What a wonderful childhood you had! The most amazing thing to do when you want to feel close to your aunt, just look at that sweet baby Clara because all of the love and adventure that your aunt brought into your life you will bring it to her. With this, your aunt will continue to live. xoxo
Randa says
Sherry, what a beautiful and touching tribute… so good to be reminded to cherish the ones we love, and not to let busyness get in the way.
May you have the time with your family that you need in the next few weeks!
Devon @ Green House, Good Life says
Oh Sherry. There just aren’t any words.
Abby says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts.
Nicole says
This is such a beautiful post Sherry-thank you for sharing! I also just lost my uncle quite suddenly and I can relate to an overwhelming feeling of just being blessed by having amazing people in your life!
My prayers are with you and your family x
Laura M. says
so sorry for your loss. Sounds like it was a fun household for sure! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time.
Sheri says
I am so sorry for your loss Sherry.
Looking at the pictures I am sure that every time you look in the mirror you remember her. You really resemble her. Two very beautiful women. Inside and out.
Rebecca in NC says
I am so sorry for your loss, Sherry. This is so touching! Your aunt sounds like she was an amazing person.
Brittany D says
Sherry, I am very sorry for your loss. Your family dynamic is beautiful and I love that you consider your cousins to be brothers! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Give your mom a big hug when you see her. She sounds like a remarkable woman, as well.
erika m says
May God and your sweet memories comfort you and your family, and especially you and your mom. Sisters/Aunts are some of the greatest blessings!
Ingeborg says
What a beautiful family you grew up in, Sherry!
This is actually why I decided to study medicine… to try to avoid the grief that disease brings to people and their loved ones.
Lots of love and all the best wishes.
YoungHouseLove says
That’s so awesome. My brother did the same thing! Just got his doctorate of chemistry and is working on clinical trials and cures at a pharmaceutical company in NJ! So proud that “the smart one” grew up to be a dr!
xo,
s
Elena says
So sorry for your loss. Your Aunt Kay Kay sounds like an amazing and inspiring woman. My thoughts are with you.
Sherri says
So sorry for you loss to you and your family. Writing is cathartic so I hope writing this beautiful post helped you. I certainly enjoyed reading about your lovely and heartwarming Aunt and family.
Andrea Ferree says
You are making me cry! A good friend of mine (she was the maid of honor in my wedding) just got diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. I’m so sorry to hear about your aunt. Love and prayers your way!
YoungHouseLove says
I’m so sorry about your friend’s diagnosis. Medicine is so much better these days I bet she will live a long happy life! It really has moved in leaps and bounds- just sad that my aunt got the disease decades ago when knowledge of how it worked and what could help was so much less developed.
xo,
s
Anna- lifefoodfamilylove.com says
Sherry I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your family with us. My thoughts are with you and your family.
MissCaron says
I’m so sorry for your loss. What a blessing to have had her in your life!
Emma says
Your aunt sounds like a fabulous woman – and it’s lovely for you to share such a personal side of you. Remembering how much she impacted your life is such a beautiful way of keeping her, but I know it is difficult still. My thoughts are with you and your family. How fortunate you all are to have had someone so amazing in your lives. Take care.
K. Z. says
I’m so sorry, Sherry. MS is brutal. Your aunt sounds like she was an amazing person who left an amazing legacy in the hearts of each of her “children” by birth or by love.
Alicia says
I’m so sorry for your loss, Sherry. This is a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing!