During our book tour stop in Palo Alto, someone brought us the funniest gift. It wasn’t a ceramic animal. It wasn’t cupcakes. It wasn’t stickers for Clara. It was a thin set of stapled paper that looked like this:
Inside was this note:
“Dear Sherry & John (And Clara & Burger), I have been a loyal blog reader since Fall 2010. I am currently a teacher and I thought it could be fun for you to see what kids think makes a house comfortable, fun, and exciting to live in. Therefore, I had them freewrite about their future house or their dream home. Enjoy! – Jacqueline”
The dozen or so entries are sweet, imaginative and – well – hilarious. It’s funny to see how some kids were very specific about the layout and size, while others liked to note the wall colors and the decorations. Here’s just a random sampling of our favorite lines:
And a few more favorites:
- There’s laser turrets and mini guns… also rocket launchers on every floor.
- My future, but mythical house, would look ordinary on the outside but mysterious inside.
- There would be a room made of candy. And there would be a room where griffins and mermaids would be.
- It sits on a 90 acre area with a 12 acre lake for fishing with friends. It also has a 40 acre golfing course. My house is 999,999 square feet.
- My house would be a cottage. The outside walls would be white, like a glowing sort of white. The window sills lined with “two-lips” and pansies.
- My door is made of wood just like the stables. The handle looks like it’s made of gold, though it isn’t.
- There are thirteen rooms, five restrooms, two living rooms, two hot tubs, two swimming pools and there are three water beds in each room and it’s so awesome. The end. Thank you for listening.
So a big thanks to teacher Jacqueline for the fun idea (and gift) and a big thanks to her students Tori, Jaxon, Lauren, Brayden, Axel, Olivia, Stevie, Shane, Colette, Sammy, and the one unnamed entry.
Happy Valentine’s Day Clara! Hope your friends liked your gifts.
This was adorable. When I was younger I always used to ask little kids in the family what they thought my husband’s name would be and what he would look like. They used to come up with the craziest things. I’m on the lookout for a guy with a cape! Let me know if you see one.
this is high-larious!
“and do not think I am crazy because this is for an emergency” … HAHAHAHAHA! the best part is that I was thinking he was a little crazy until that reminder at the end.
Oh how I love teachers! And the students are just so adorable with such great imaginations. Thanks for this post and Happy Valentine’s Day (or as my niece would say, “Happy Valentimes Day”) xoxo
Hahahah – what grade are these kids in????????
We wish we knew! It wasn’t on the packet, but we’d guess maybe fourth grade?
xo
s
This is hilarious! It’s especially funny to me because we’re shopping for our first house!
How old are these kids?!
The packet didn’t say, but we’d guess maybe fourth grade?
xo
s
hahahah! that is hilarious – thanks for sharing!
These are so great. I feel badly for the kid who’s worried about a nuclear attack. Someone needs to take him to the park or something! I also love the kid with the 90 acre lot, 12 acre lake, etc. He’s a numbers man!
I love all of them! It’s hard to pick a favorite, but a house with 9 floors and a dining room on each one? Oh yeah. Food. Child has his or her priorities straight. Ooh thanks for the laughs!
This is AMAZING! Wow, best gift ever! Also, I would love to visit the house with the puppy-giveaway! :) :)
Pink Disco Party Animal! #newbandnamecalledit #parksandrec
Hehe this was awesome!
hahahaha!
So funny! “Do not think I am crazy because this is for emergencies” Oh boy.
This made my whole day. Especially…”And do not think I am crazy because this is for an emergency.” Thanks for the laugh :)
This is one of the greatest posts ever! Love the graphics you made for each of them as well, so appropriate :)
LOVE THIS! So cute. I want to live in the disco ball house :)
I love this! So hilarious!
Love. Love. LOVE. LUUUURRRV. Kids are the best.
Happy love day.
White couches and puppies… best of luck to that kid!
Ha! I was thinking the exact same thing
When I was little I wanted my someday house to be painted in rainbow stripes. I still think it would be pretty epic… but perhaps I’ll save that idea for my someday-kids’ play house. (I also love reading what kids think love is!!)
LAUGHING OUT LOUD. Hilarious :)
This is SO cute. What a great idea!
Aww that’s too cute and so funny! The things kids say.
someone always forgets their name!
If there’s a big skeleton fireplace on the 1st floor, I can’t wait to find out what’s on the 2nd…probably everyone whose taking cover from the big solar flare EMERGENCY :)
(I sure hope the kid in the house that resembles the White House knows what to do :)
xox
OMG, hilarious! I love the specificity of the spam one. I wonder what $40k can get you in freeze dried food.
I’m not having a great day, but this made me laugh and laugh. So. Cute.
You know the “Emergency ONLY” kid is going to grow up to be Sheldon Cooper.
Haha! I was thinking the same thing!
“I´m not crazy, my mom had me tested”
That´s such a cute present!
I love this and I’m so glad you shared it. Kids are so creative! Have you done this activity with Clara?
Ooh I totally should!
xo
s
Loved this! What an adorable gift. Kids definitely say the cutest/funniest things!
Sounds like that one kid has been watching Doomsday Preppers on the History channel… which is strangely fascinating, I have to admit.
That was hilarious ! Can you share more please please !!!
I’m reading these descriptions, and all I can think is what a nightmare these dream homes would be to clean. These kids are awesome. My favorite is the doorknob that appears to be gold but isn’t. :) Why hold back now? You could go for Oprah money.
John and Sherry, have you seen the documentary “Queen of Versailles,” about the biggest home in America? You have to see it. This is hilarious. Thank you for sharing.
I’ve heard of it, but not seen it. Gotta add it to Netflix!
-John
Kids seriously write the most hilarious things! My best friend is a first grade teacher, and she always saves a stack of her favorite writing responses for me to read when I visit. Some of the greats include:
1. “If I could be any animal, I would a squirrel with rabies. I would sneak into people’s houses, bite them, then take their house.”
2. “What I Did This Weekend: Mommy and Daddy had me play outside in the snow while they played in the hot tub.”
3. “The definition of a ‘draft’ is an animal with a long neck, but I don’t want to write about that. Here’s what happened on The Walking Dead last night…”
And these are FIRST GRADERS! I’m amazed by the creativity and humor of young minds.
Oh wow, a first grader watching The Walking Dead. That’s one tough kid!
-John
I used your template to make a 2013 calendar for myself, and the quote I used for February is the perfect addition to this post! It’s one of my students last year, writing about his future:
In my dining room I will have golden picture frames. I will get a dirt bike and Abe Lincoln’s Hat.
:)
LOL. Love that he’s on the Lincoln train.
-John
Kids are so funny. Ask them about almost anything and they will give you the most heartfelt answers.
This is precisely why I love being a teacher!
It takes a bit of creativity, a lot of love and patience, bundles of respectful structure and communication, and a gaggle of great kids. Voila- magic and learning in each moment!
Ha, these are adorable.
Hahaha! That is so cute and funny!
We’re celebrating a year of being in our house today and I laughed going through our lists of what we wanted compared to what we bought and love! :)
What an awesome gift!!!!
And I am loving your graphics :)
This is so awesome. I love that you can tell what their parents value, their siblings talk about, and how creative they are. Adorable.
Awesome! Love this! So fun!
This is amazing. I have a few friends who are teachers, and my favorite is when they post kid quotes on their Facebook. Kids are so great! Also, now I know whose house to crash in case of emergency.
bahaha this is awesome. Puppies on a white couch- priceless. But to be fair I think the nuclear bomb shelter house would be my husband’s dream house too :)
Oh my gosh, this reminds me of the house I dreamed of for years as a kid! It was a house with many floors and lots of rooms, and each room had a unique smell, from the hyacinth room to the lily room to the cinnamon room to the woods-after-a-rain room. Obviously each room would be decorated to complement its scent. I think I tried to draw it once, but it was very difficult to communicate with crayons. Kids have the best ideas.
love the white house one.
Pink disco ball for the win! (By the way, what is a skeleton fireplace?) These are so great. What a creative gift! Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for the illustration with 9 dining room table sets. I think that’s the essence of why I love this blog.
Thanks Katie!
-John
Bahaha! These are fantastic.
When my youngest sister was in kindergarten, her class made a cookbook together….with their own recipes. My favorite was the recipe for chicken ribs. I had a pot of gold that was kid quotes from my preschool teaching days. Kids are just the best.
These are adorable! Wonder what Clara would say for hers… Pretty sure my little guy would ask for a house made of cars, trucks, and crackers where he’s allowed to color/paint with yogurt on the walls :)
I WANT A WHITE COUCH FULL OF PUPPIES.
As long as I don’t have to clean the white couch.