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Young House Love » Random » Feeeeeelings

| By Sherry Petersik | September 9, 2014 | 5,348 Comments

Feeeeeelings

This post was 3,000 words long. They all felt overly complicated and heavy and weird. I clicked delete. Then I just typed what we’re really feeling, complete with things we’ve never said out loud and even a few things we’ve never fully admitted to ourselves before.

The truth is that we love you guys. Like for real. Even for the tough love. We know you say it because you care (or hopefully you did at some point), and we want you to know we care right back. We want to do a good job. We want to do this with joy and excitement. We want to inspire you. We know this is an incredible way to have made a living and we are full of gratitude for the experience to have shared the last seven years of our lives with you guys online.

We would NEVER be here without you, and not a day goes by that we don’t know that. It’s why we asked for your feedback last week and read every last comment. We appreciate the honesty and the passion you guys have on the topic of making this blog great. And we agree with a lot of what was being said. We have been feeling off for a while – like we have lost our rhythm and we’re somehow missing the mark for ourselves and for you guys. We too miss the good old days when we did this for the love and were full of such obvious joy and spontaneity. This felt like a place we all hung out and it just doesn’t have that vibe anymore.

Over the years many amazing opportunities popped up for us. Things we never dreamed of doing in a million years, and things we’re incredibly grateful to have had the chance to experience. A book deal, curating paint picks with Benjamin Moore, a line sold at Target, a showhouse, etc. But in hindsight those things also made this feel a lot more like a business than a personal blog to many of you, and to us as well. We have actually ramped those down behind the scenes in an attempt to get back to our roots (we no longer do the BM color collection, the second book is mostly written, our products at Target have completed their run, and we finished the showhouse) but we never really made a big announcement about that – so it’s completely understandable that some of you might think we’ve moved on to those greener pastures and left the blog in the dust, so to speak. The reality is that our site propels the success of any outside project like a product or book, so we could never turn our backs on the blog and expect those items to continue to sell as well.

Not only have we felt this shift from “John and Sherry” to “Young House Love: The Brand”, but the blogosphere as a whole has become increasingly sponsored/corporate lately. We can see from the outside prospective as a reader, or even a fellow blogger, that it’s hard to read a blog post without suspecting some ulterior motive or money-making system behind it. Last week a few of you mentioned that we might need to keep giveaways around because they pay us well, which surprised us since they’re never something we accept payment for (we like to pass free things along to you as a thank you for reading).

Along with the whole business/brand thing that’s going on, and the side gigs that felt like they muddied the water for some of you, there are certainly other things we wish we had handled differently in hindsight. Just to name a few, there’s: being too defensive, over-explaining, letting things get in our heads and change our lighthearted approach, and the internal struggle between being transparent and oversharing personal details like a vacant new house without an alarm system (looking back we wish we’d handled our third house announcement differently). We know many of you felt insulted that we didn’t share more freely about that house, and we truly apologize.

Anyway, back to that whole “we’re sexy stumbling and you know it” thing. It’s endlessly frustrating to do a job that you love poorly, especially when it’s a blog baby that you’ve birthed yourself and nurtured for seven years. And especially when it’s such an amazing job that we once felt so inspired and joyful to wake up and do each day. What’s wrong with us? We know this is a dream job. We acknowledge it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. We know most people who have built something like this would be more inspired than ever. It’s not that we lost the gratitude, I think it’s that we feel like we’ve fallen out of our groove. We feel like we’re letting you guys down repeatedly. It got to the point that every time we pressed “publish” we braced ourselves.

So in an attempt to stop stumbling around and feeling like we just can’t get it back, we’re taking a break. We don’t know exactly how long we’ll be stepping away, but our guess would be at least a month. We will certainly be exploring other options for supporting our family (something we mentioned we were considering back in April). We had that fiery blog-spark back when we had day jobs and did this as a hobby, so we think it could be a good change. We’ll also be taking a break on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, but the blog will stay public so you guys can access the archives whenever you’d like.

Our internal struggle and the state of this blog is entirely of our making, and we completely own that. Please don’t get mad at anyone for being honest with their feedback last week or accuse them of sending us packing. We have been struggling with that “something is off” feeling for a while now, and after way too much denial and “we’ll turn it around” pep talks, we finally asked for your feedback because we truly wanted to hear what you were thinking. It was cathartic and helpful for us. It has allowed us to very clearly see that if we have any respect for this blog and our love of it, and for you guys and what you’d like to see, we need to take a break if we ever want any hope of getting back to that fun/real/spontaneous place it used to be when this was something we did for the love instead of the high stakes game of supporting a family.

In summary: we love you, we thank you, and we hope you understand.

Love Rock

Filed Under: Random

Our Laundry Room Makeover
The Time Of Our Lives

Comments

  1. spiteorflight says

    October 8, 2014 at 2:54 pm

    The anticipation of whether or not you guys will be back tomorrow is killlliiiinnnnnggggg me. Longest 30 days, ever. Fingers crossed for a super bloggy YHL surprise tomorrow.

    Reply
  2. Jessie says

    October 8, 2014 at 3:03 pm

    Can you get a Like button like FB I want to like so many comments on here!! see ya tomorrow?? if not can we at least get a picture.. pretty pls.. with a Sherry on top.. (see how i did that Sherry = Cherry) LOL!! yes i’m corny!!

    Reply
  3. NancyH71 says

    October 8, 2014 at 4:02 pm

    Miss you and your blog. It’s been a long month. Please come back soon.

    Reply
  4. Jessica says

    October 8, 2014 at 4:08 pm

    Oh my gosh, I just stumbled upon your blog TODAY, after finding the “how to make a 15 minute shade”. I think it’s so awesome and bold of you to take a breather. Hope you enjoy your break. Who knows what else may come along. P.S. Thanks for the shade tutorial :)

    Reply
  5. Allison says

    October 8, 2014 at 4:09 pm

    Hoping you will be back tomorrow! I’ve missed your blog this past month!

    Reply
  6. Kylene says

    October 8, 2014 at 4:35 pm

    How has a month gone by so quickly? Are you guys wondering the same thing? I’ve been a reader for years and I’ve happily checked in here many times over the last 30 days. I just want you to know how much you are loved and appreciated by your fans. I hope you were able to rest and relax, and that the answers you need have come to you quickly – if not, that’s ok too. Take all the time you need to do what is right for your family. We’ll be here when (if) you come back to this space. <3 I do have to say that in the last 6-9 months many of the blogs I used to read regularly have changed, slowed down, or stopped writing completely. Blogging is transforming somehow and I don't think any of us know where it will end up, just wanted you to know that you are definitely not the only ones. ;) Hope to see your smiling faces (and projects) online again soon! Thanks for all you've shared with us!

    Reply
  7. Kate J. says

    October 8, 2014 at 4:35 pm

    I just had the urge to leave a comment and say I missed you guys and I realize that I am in good company! There are so many posts saying the same thing. I hope the time away is just doing to trick- take as much as you need. I will be eagerly waiting for you when you decide to return

    Reply
  8. Shauna says

    October 8, 2014 at 4:36 pm

    I keep checking in to see if you guys have announced your BIG come back yet…. My morning routine just isn’t the same without you!! Anyway, you guys are missed (if you haven’t already noticed!), but I hope you are enjoying some much need, and WELL DESERVED, down time. Hope we see you back sometime soon!

    Reply
  9. Jessica Díaz says

    October 8, 2014 at 5:04 pm

    It’s amazing see how many people miss YHL, and in the same time is kind of sad.
    I really miss your blog, nowadays i feel like when u finish of reading a really good book where you get in love of one of the characters, but the tinny difference that you are real people who we love, and we care. I know sounds stupid but sometimes read about the happiness of another person can get you day a little more happy too.

    I love you guys and cheers from México :)

    Reply
  10. wendi says

    October 8, 2014 at 5:46 pm

    Come back…even if it is 2 single paragraph.. You made our lives less crazy..less keeping up with the Jones’s and more we’re all friends. Miss y’all..even Lil Burger

    Reply
  11. Angelica says

    October 8, 2014 at 5:47 pm

    I’m having major anxiety about whether or not there will be a new post tomorrow. PLEASE HELP ME. Lol sorry, I miss you guys!

    Reply
  12. Shannon says

    October 8, 2014 at 6:49 pm

    Nice know I’m not the only one hoping and praying for any sort of update tomorrow. I know it was a month ‘or more’ but I miss my YHL updates. Thinking of you guys! xxoo

    Reply
    • Tanja says

      October 8, 2014 at 11:43 pm

      I know I’m hoping they’ll be a post tomorrow but it does say “a month or more”…

  13. Laura says

    October 8, 2014 at 8:17 pm

    Well I thought I’d check on my reader again to see if you had a post. Obviously I’m not the only one looking for one. You are missed. Funny how you can feel like friends with people you’ve never met. Hope your family is well.

    Reply
  14. Roxanne says

    October 8, 2014 at 8:34 pm

    Ok , month done . Ready Set Post ?

    Reply
  15. Tracy says

    October 8, 2014 at 8:57 pm

    Man it’s weird to legit miss strangers :) But I do and it’s been the longest month for us loyal readers. I hope your month+ off is recharging your creative efforts & that you’re happy! You guys are awesome – blogging or not… you are so missed.

    Reply
  16. Rachel says

    October 8, 2014 at 8:59 pm

    OMG. Tomorrow marks a month. I will begin refreshing YHL at 6am. We really miss you, Petersiks.

    Reply
  17. Diana says

    October 8, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    I’ve read a few books recently that you recommended (mostly through your “we’re digging” column) and they’ve all been wonderful. I think these all came from you:
    -Parenting with Love & Logic
    -Hands Free Mama
    -Organized Simplicity
    -Simplicity Parenting
    So, if you could at least keep up the book recommendations I’d really appreciate it. =)

    (And seriously, I really want you to do what is best for your family but also really hoping that includes blogging to some extent. I’m really curious to see what to do with your dining room and the whole kitchen remodel and everything else! That sounds stalkery but really, it’s inspirational.)

    Reply
  18. Vanessa says

    October 8, 2014 at 9:53 pm

    Officially running out of ways to feel “connected”..I google you guys 3x a week just to find out if someone out there knows something I don’t. Long time reader but I have never re-read so many posts, or discovered so much about your blog as I have this last month…my latest find was the Forums section (loving it).
    It’s been too much a part of my daily routine to just give up on visiting…we miss Clara and Burger and (obviously) YOU BOTH!
    Crossing my fingers for an update tomorrow
    vanessa

    Reply
  19. Carolyn Hunt says

    October 8, 2014 at 9:57 pm

    I’ve been checking in regularly, but am relieved to see you are still “resting” and doing what is best FOR YOUR FAMILY no matter what the rest of us want you to do. Just wanted to say hi, miss your posts, but I affirm your need to say “Whoa” and re-assess.

    Reply
  20. Julie says

    October 8, 2014 at 10:14 pm

    Please remember that adjusting to life as a family of 4 is no small task… We’ve gone through this transition this year, too. Give yourself grace as you creates a new ‘normal’ family routine. Sending support whatever the outcome of the blog might be!

    Reply
  21. Sherri says

    October 8, 2014 at 10:25 pm

    Waiting and hoping that tomorrow you will be back to your blogland fans. I know you have had time to do some soul-searching in this window of time. I am also certain that there are tons of opportunities out there-some probably much more lucrative and stimulating than what you currently do. But one can hope(even pray!) that you are ready, willing , and able to return to that one-of-a-kind blog entitled YHL- the BEST in the universe. Love to you both and the precious kiddos!!

    Reply
  22. Elizabeth says

    October 8, 2014 at 10:32 pm

    Hey guys. It’s been almost a month (I’d say who’s counting but we all totally are), but I actually checked back in today to see the archives – I’m finally tackling the grout in my bathroom floor this weekend. I’m nervous, but I figured if Sherry can handle an entire foyer, my Manhattan-sized bathroom shouldn’t be too terrible. And that’s when I realized something.

    You did that. You took home improvement – real, scary home improvement, in a room where there’s water and stuff, and made it accessible. You told me stories, and showed me patience, and made it so I’m not afraid to Google things, or Youtube thing, or YHL things until I feel ready to make my apartment more a home.

    I hope you come back. But I just started a new job, coming from an old one that wasn’t terrible, but that felt exhausting and stressful all the time. And I have to say, in this new one, I’m constantly overwhelmed and super excited and learning so much. So while I hope you come back, I want it to be because there’s something so wonderful you have to share it with us (Clara’s Halloween costume? Something awesome John built? Sherry – go paint something and share it with the internet! It makes us so happy when you do). Find your spark again. And I hope you know, regardless of where this all takes you, how much you’ve built here.

    I started reading because I loved your voice, your welcoming attitude, and your projects. And I found you’d managed, in a snarky and anonymous internet, to create a community of people who are genuinely excited for one another. I want to thank you for that. And apologize for not doing it sooner.

    We miss you. But I’m also weirdly, stranger-on-the-internet proud of you. For staying true to yourselves, for creating this awesome space for us, and for everything you’ve accomplished. I’m really grateful to you, and hope you feel good about what you’ve built. It’s one helluva house full of love.

    Reply
    • Michelle (aka mybelle101) says

      October 9, 2014 at 12:54 am

      Perfectly, perfectly said!! I’ve been checking back often over the past month to see if there are any new posts, but also to check out past projects and look for your recommendations on things. You both really do make everything feel so accessible and made me want to do things on my own that I would have saved for my hubby to fix/build/change. Thank you!

      Like Elizabeth says, I’m hoping you find your spark again, and that you come back. The internet/blogosphere just isn’t the same without you!! (And, I just keep picturing Dory from Finding Nemo every time I visit…”Cooooome baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacckk” (Too much orca?) MISS YOU GUYS!!

  23. Lisa S says

    October 8, 2014 at 10:43 pm

    Hi! I hope you come back! Like many others, I have been checking lately. No pressure though. I don’t read blogs. I just read yours because it is so well done. For the same reasons we all love this blog, I think that’s why you guys are exhausted of it! I would be so happy with a once a week post. It could be small. It could be big! I just installed a new kitchen side sprayer at my house. Before, I would have waited and paid someone for fear I couldn’t do it myself. Thanks to your blog, I have started tackling things around the house and I feel empowered. I don’t think I’ll build a whole laundry room, but you never know…I really just want to refinish or annie chalk paint an old end table at my house. Your projects and books are really inspiring.

    Cheers! I hope you went somewhere tropical.

    Reply
  24. Melissa says

    October 8, 2014 at 11:35 pm

    Just wanted to say missing your posts…

    Reply
  25. Lynne says

    October 9, 2014 at 12:09 am

    Hi,
    I’m not sure why I started reading your blog about a year ago. I’m not young. My children were babies in the 80’s. I rarely DIY my house. But I do Love your blog. It’s because your authenticity comes through so strongly in your writing. That is your gift.
    But only you can decide if continuing this blog is right for you. Even though I, along with everyone else, would love to see it continue.
    But you cannot make decisions to please others. You must do what is right for you. It is not your responsibility to meet the needs of all these posters.
    Decide what is most important to you, what your purpose is, and if continuing the blog will serve that purpose.
    And I , along with everyone else, will be logging on tomorrow; hoping that continuing to share your gift with us meets your purpose.
    Thank you for the gift of your writing, and for so generously sharing your family and life with us.

    Reply
  26. Alisha says

    October 9, 2014 at 12:58 am

    I miss you guys! I understand and appreciate your leave of absence, but I’m having withdrawals.

    Reply
  27. jennlbeard says

    October 9, 2014 at 1:46 am

    Can’t wait for some Petersik updates soon! I miss my favorite bloggers!

    Reply
  28. Kayla says

    October 9, 2014 at 2:19 am

    I was just thinking again about how much I miss you guys and how badly I want to hear from you, and then I realized… more than anything, more than updates about the house or projects, I just want to know how you and your family are doing. How this has impacted you, what you are thinking about how to move forward, if you’ve been refreshed while away, and what you want for your lives. I sincerely hope the thousands of comments and voices of love have drowned out the negativity and if you WANT to come back to blogging, that you do. We will be incredibly sad if you don’t, but we will live… life will go on. Do what is right for you. We will love you no matter what.

    Reply
  29. Angel Gold says

    October 9, 2014 at 2:56 am

    It’s been a long month guys! I hope you’ve been having fun and relaxing whilst not posting. We all miss you.

    Reply
  30. Natalie Land says

    October 9, 2014 at 5:25 am

    It is already tomorrow (9th) in Australia and there is still no new posts. If there is nothing about the new laundry door tomorrow I might cry. It’s been a long month and no other blogs stack up I’m afraid. (except mine of course hahahaha)

    Reply
  31. Alaina says

    October 9, 2014 at 5:28 am

    I hope you’re all well, and I look forward to an update on what’s next, whatever that may be.
    Cheers from NZ

    Reply
  32. Laurie says

    October 9, 2014 at 7:43 am

    When KTB posted that you two were chatting on the phone, I got giddy excited that you might be coming back on here (because, you know, in my head, we’re like the three musketeers — creepy, I know.) I’m in a new house and constantly digging through your archives. Maybe the problem is that you’ve “been there, done that, wrote a bomb tutorial about it” for every mid-level DIY project you can possibly do to a house. What’s left are these complicated things, like electrical and insulation, that just aren’t as accessible and exciting for your average DIY-er. If that’s the case, I’d totally just take an entire blog of Clara Conversations. Just sayin’. YHL you are loved and missed.

    Reply
  33. brittney says

    October 9, 2014 at 8:51 am

    Been following you all since I moved to Richmond back in 2009…now in a different state, I still follow and miss you all dearly! Loved watching the houses and family grow and change…Hope the best for whatever plan is set out for you!

    Reply
  34. Erica says

    October 9, 2014 at 8:59 am

    Miss you guys! I hope you are feeling rejuvenated…and I really hope you decide to come back to blogging. The Blog world and my world is not the same without you!

    Reply
  35. Hayley H. says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:14 am

    I miss yall. Come back soon.

    Reply
  36. Tracy de Lemos says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:22 am

    Really miss you guys. I think it is important that you decided to take a step back and figure out what is best for you and your family. But I sure do hope you decide to come back soon :). My 10ams just aren’t the same without you guys! Regardless of how long you stay away, we will always be big Petersik fans in our household and will support you however we can! Thank you for teaching us so much and making our days a little bit brighter!

    Reply
  37. Fenny says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:36 am

    Come back soon. That’s all.

    Reply
  38. Lee Ann McKee (@leeannmckee) says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:38 am

    Love you guys. Have a well- deserved break! I’ve not been online for a while ( I’m based overseas with limited Internet ) so my jaw dropped when I read the post about your sabbatical. But, as sad as I am that you won’t be posting for a while, I Totally understand your reasons and think it was probably a long time coming. You guys are like the 5 star,feast for the eyes, amazing quality writing, ideas, photos, posts etc. You are clearly super passionate, authentic and giving to your audience and that was always clear in all your content. Ive never ever felt your blog ever got less quality as your working portfolio diversified. A natural progression I believe – books, etc. You deserve it all and it makes your community (us readers) proud to have been part of your journey. Dream job or not, every job needs some downtime. You guys have a family and probably had very little privacy for a long time. Enjoy your time as a family. Take those moments for you guys. Your community and real fans/audience will be waiting here when u feel ready to re-explore your next creative adventure. I’ve been reading u guys for last 3 years) and was always lovely to check in with you all… Take care! Big love from Bali xx

    Reply
  39. DebinNYC says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:39 am

    I so hope to see an October 9th post (TODAY :) )
    Please update us … we miss you guys!!!

    Reply
  40. Erin says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:44 am

    Just thinking about the 5 of you today- wishing the best!!

    Reply
  41. Megan says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:50 am

    Come back!!!!! i seriously miss you guys!

    Reply
  42. Judith says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:51 am

    Okay, it has been a month!!! I miss you guys!

    Reply
  43. Amada says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:56 am

    Ditto. You are missed.

    Reply
  44. singlemomthriving says

    October 9, 2014 at 9:56 am

    It’s been a month today and I’m here, looking for you, like Spence Tracy in An Affair to Remember. <3

    Reply
  45. Katie says

    October 9, 2014 at 10:02 am

    It’s been a long month…….come back :(

    Reply
  46. erika says

    October 9, 2014 at 10:02 am

    We really miss you guys!! I hope you at least will let us know if/when you will be back…. the suspense is driving us all crazy! I took off 12 weeks from work after each of my 3 kids so I think your break is awesome and well deserved.

    Reply
  47. younganddomestic says

    October 9, 2014 at 10:05 am

    Hope you and your family are well! Miss you guys!

    Reply
  48. Patty S says

    October 9, 2014 at 10:06 am

    Will you post to tell us what your decision is when you make it? If you choose to follow another path, I (and about 5,000 other people) need closure. :(

    We love/miss you Petersiks!

    Reply
  49. Tara S says

    October 9, 2014 at 10:22 am

    Just wanted to say I hope you are enjoying your break. Honestly, a month goes by so fast. I remember feeling how fast my maternity leave went by and that was over 4 months. Love the new family picture. Teddy looks so grown up. The VA born shirt is adorable!! I am not holding my breathe that you will be back today but figured I would let you know I’m still here. And I will still be here no matter how long of a break you take. My “baby” is almost 2 and half. When I can take off a random day of work and just have me and him time, it’s priceless. I also wanted to say that it’s amazing watching my two kids create this amazing sibling bond together. I can fold laundry in peace while the two of them play legos together. You have so much to look forward too. Every stage is different and fun. Ok, I’m rambling now. Miss you guys.

    Reply
  50. Monica says

    October 9, 2014 at 3:02 pm

    Your readers feel a connection, myself included, to you guys because you were authentic from day 1. The blog was always written by the two of you, even as you allowed more and more strangers into your lives. I feel like your parting away from the blog is in-step with your authentic-ness. Do what you need to do, your fans will be on stand-by. You’ve inspired many newbie DIYers across the U.S., that won’t change! Enjoy your family and your new horizons!!

    Cheers, Monica

    Reply
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