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Young House Love » Random » Feeeeeelings

| By Sherry Petersik | September 9, 2014 | 5,348 Comments

Feeeeeelings

This post was 3,000 words long. They all felt overly complicated and heavy and weird. I clicked delete. Then I just typed what we’re really feeling, complete with things we’ve never said out loud and even a few things we’ve never fully admitted to ourselves before.

The truth is that we love you guys. Like for real. Even for the tough love. We know you say it because you care (or hopefully you did at some point), and we want you to know we care right back. We want to do a good job. We want to do this with joy and excitement. We want to inspire you. We know this is an incredible way to have made a living and we are full of gratitude for the experience to have shared the last seven years of our lives with you guys online.

We would NEVER be here without you, and not a day goes by that we don’t know that. It’s why we asked for your feedback last week and read every last comment. We appreciate the honesty and the passion you guys have on the topic of making this blog great. And we agree with a lot of what was being said. We have been feeling off for a while – like we have lost our rhythm and we’re somehow missing the mark for ourselves and for you guys. We too miss the good old days when we did this for the love and were full of such obvious joy and spontaneity. This felt like a place we all hung out and it just doesn’t have that vibe anymore.

Over the years many amazing opportunities popped up for us. Things we never dreamed of doing in a million years, and things we’re incredibly grateful to have had the chance to experience. A book deal, curating paint picks with Benjamin Moore, a line sold at Target, a showhouse, etc. But in hindsight those things also made this feel a lot more like a business than a personal blog to many of you, and to us as well. We have actually ramped those down behind the scenes in an attempt to get back to our roots (we no longer do the BM color collection, the second book is mostly written, our products at Target have completed their run, and we finished the showhouse) but we never really made a big announcement about that – so it’s completely understandable that some of you might think we’ve moved on to those greener pastures and left the blog in the dust, so to speak. The reality is that our site propels the success of any outside project like a product or book, so we could never turn our backs on the blog and expect those items to continue to sell as well.

Not only have we felt this shift from “John and Sherry” to “Young House Love: The Brand”, but the blogosphere as a whole has become increasingly sponsored/corporate lately. We can see from the outside prospective as a reader, or even a fellow blogger, that it’s hard to read a blog post without suspecting some ulterior motive or money-making system behind it. Last week a few of you mentioned that we might need to keep giveaways around because they pay us well, which surprised us since they’re never something we accept payment for (we like to pass free things along to you as a thank you for reading).

Along with the whole business/brand thing that’s going on, and the side gigs that felt like they muddied the water for some of you, there are certainly other things we wish we had handled differently in hindsight. Just to name a few, there’s: being too defensive, over-explaining, letting things get in our heads and change our lighthearted approach, and the internal struggle between being transparent and oversharing personal details like a vacant new house without an alarm system (looking back we wish we’d handled our third house announcement differently). We know many of you felt insulted that we didn’t share more freely about that house, and we truly apologize.

Anyway, back to that whole “we’re sexy stumbling and you know it” thing. It’s endlessly frustrating to do a job that you love poorly, especially when it’s a blog baby that you’ve birthed yourself and nurtured for seven years. And especially when it’s such an amazing job that we once felt so inspired and joyful to wake up and do each day. What’s wrong with us? We know this is a dream job. We acknowledge it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. We know most people who have built something like this would be more inspired than ever. It’s not that we lost the gratitude, I think it’s that we feel like we’ve fallen out of our groove. We feel like we’re letting you guys down repeatedly. It got to the point that every time we pressed “publish” we braced ourselves.

So in an attempt to stop stumbling around and feeling like we just can’t get it back, we’re taking a break. We don’t know exactly how long we’ll be stepping away, but our guess would be at least a month. We will certainly be exploring other options for supporting our family (something we mentioned we were considering back in April). We had that fiery blog-spark back when we had day jobs and did this as a hobby, so we think it could be a good change. We’ll also be taking a break on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, but the blog will stay public so you guys can access the archives whenever you’d like.

Our internal struggle and the state of this blog is entirely of our making, and we completely own that. Please don’t get mad at anyone for being honest with their feedback last week or accuse them of sending us packing. We have been struggling with that “something is off” feeling for a while now, and after way too much denial and “we’ll turn it around” pep talks, we finally asked for your feedback because we truly wanted to hear what you were thinking. It was cathartic and helpful for us. It has allowed us to very clearly see that if we have any respect for this blog and our love of it, and for you guys and what you’d like to see, we need to take a break if we ever want any hope of getting back to that fun/real/spontaneous place it used to be when this was something we did for the love instead of the high stakes game of supporting a family.

In summary: we love you, we thank you, and we hope you understand.

Love Rock

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Filed Under: Random

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Comments

  1. Nicole Lindquist says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:02 pm

    Ugh, I miss you guys terribly, though I totally understand why you stepped away. I remember being amazed at how you juggled so much after Clara was born. You’d have to be superhuman to do that with two children who have such different needs or just never ever ever sleep. My hope is that this break will give you time to reflect on just how much you’ve accomplish and how you always gave 100%. I personally would rather see you guys do you and be real than force posts that there’s no time for. Would love to see you pop up in my feed reader again but until then, thanks for all your years of hard work and commitment to YHL. DIY doesn’t scare me anymore and your book makes a great housewarming gift. All the best!

    Reply
  2. KyCat says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:10 pm

    Miss you. I hope that everything is going well.
    :-)

    Reply
  3. Sharon Faye says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:16 pm

    Just a note to say I miss you… A lot! I stumbled on your blog a few years ago and quickly went back through your archives and started from the beginning. Loved reading about how you sold your houses, your bathroom remodel in your first home, all your painting ideas, furniture reclaims, flooring installations, frames and picture layout, just… everything… I miss it. My husband and I are making plans to renovate a bathroom and lay flooring throughout the house next spring/summer and after reading your blogs and tutorials, I just really believe that some of this we are actually capable of doing ourselves. I love your book. But I loved reading the little redesign things you have on your blog as well. Please come back?

    Reply
  4. Emily says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:16 pm

    Hello! Just wanted to let you both know that I miss you (and I’m sure a ton of other people do too)! I feel like you’ve become a friend since I’ve started reading your blog so it’s weird to not hear from a friend for so long! Just wanted to let you know that you’re loved and you have faithful followers out here. People are going to be honest about their opinions and I hope none of them have hurt your feelings because you are amazing, hilarious, fun-loving people and I hope you know that! With that being said, I totally respect you wanting to take a break and totally understand that you need time to gather your feelings and figure out what you want to do moving forward. Take your time in deciding but, just know, I will be here when/if you return!

    Reply
    • emmyA says

      October 1, 2014 at 5:54 pm

      Ditto! I hope you are feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. And I hope you are thinking about coming back to this space. I realized last week that I haven’t checked my blog reader on a regular basis since you said goodbye. We miss you!

  5. Stacy Smith says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:16 pm

    If you haven’t checked out Centsational Girl lately, she posted about why she blogs and I found it rather interesting. She said it much better than I ever could and I loved that there was no judgement in it, just a statement of fact. Miss your blog and your writing style. I’ve always wanted to write a blog and after coming across yours it made it seem doable. But you guys threw yourselves into it sometimes posting multiple posts in a single day. I just don’t have the energy for that. And once a week seems like a why bother approach to me.
    Please do what is right for you and do not let the negative Nancy’s out there weigh on your decision. If you decide to go back into advertising, both of you going back to work or even just one of you going back to work – know that what you decided is right for you and that is enough.

    Reply
  6. Rebbie says

    October 1, 2014 at 2:48 pm

    Miss you!

    Reply
  7. Meagan says

    October 1, 2014 at 3:58 pm

    Miss you guys!

    Reply
  8. Stephanie Riskey says

    October 1, 2014 at 4:00 pm

    I’ve followed you for five years and it makes me sad that people can be critical and make you really have to question what you’re doing. Know that you are truly appreciated <3

    Reply
  9. Cam says

    October 1, 2014 at 4:05 pm

    Are you baaaack yet?!?! :) :) I miss you guys way too much!!!

    Reply
  10. Avery Leopard says

    October 1, 2014 at 4:14 pm

    Okay, I miss you guys like crazy. Please come back to us soon! You have no idea what an inspiration your growing family is to me and mine, and what a highlight of my day it is to see a new post from the Petersiks. I keep checking to see if you are back and get a little sad, but I hope ya’ll are getting some much needed R&R! Your fans love you and miss you, and the whole blogging world seems to be on high alert since Sept 9th when Sherry made the announcement. Come back when you are ready…but I hope it’s soon :) Love and support always, Avery from Tuscaloosa

    Reply
  11. JB says

    October 1, 2014 at 4:55 pm

    Hi John and Sherry,

    I’ve been reading your blog for a few years and it’s probably one of the blogs I look forward to reading most. My husband and I bought our first house a few years ago and I’m always looking to your blog (and book) for inspiration and design ideas. Regardless of where your future takes you, I just wanted to thank you for all the great posts. I hope you guys figure out something that works for you and family :)

    Reply
  12. Jessica says

    October 1, 2014 at 5:06 pm

    Just thinking about you all! Praying that you feel direction and peace during your break!

    Reply
  13. Susan says

    October 1, 2014 at 5:10 pm

    Hope your time off has been super! That being said, please come back soon. I miss you guys! <3

    Reply
  14. Whitney says

    October 1, 2014 at 6:55 pm

    Even though I didn’t check in everyday (after having a baby last November) I miss you guys. A lot. Hope you are getting the time you need to recharge. We all need it from time to time, and I would say you were long overdue. I hope you are doing something fun!

    Reply
  15. Nelle says

    October 1, 2014 at 7:04 pm

    Still keep checking in to see if you have returned, sure do miss you guys! Hope you are having a good break away from it all and I hope you decide to return soon.

    Reply
  16. Andreza Novaes says

    October 1, 2014 at 7:28 pm

    Just so you guys know… I reaaally miss you.

    Reply
  17. mercadotx says

    October 1, 2014 at 8:40 pm

    I will miss you guys! It’s such a great blog and I hope you make it back (for my purely selfish reasons). Not a lot of people have the skills (or drive) to create a blog (which you started as a hobby, correct?), fill it with great content and basically turn it into a business. You have your own business and you can go on sabbatical if you want or decide to do something completely different. Good luck with everything!!

    Reply
  18. Sally says

    October 1, 2014 at 8:43 pm

    Please come back…………….Miss you so very much. xoxo

    Reply
  19. Rachel says

    October 1, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    Sigh. It’s almost been a month since the ‘break’ started, and now when I wander over here to check YHL, I’m so nervous!!! I so badly want you guys back, but at the same time, what if you come back and say you’re DONE with blogging! The horror!
    Know that you are loved and missed, and that I deeply respect your commitment to your family, and to life balance. You will be supported no matter WHAT you decide to do. (But, obvi, we want you to decide to keep inspiring us with your home, your family, your projects, your charisma, your Petersikiness.)

    Reply
  20. Emily says

    October 1, 2014 at 9:11 pm

    Just dropping by to say hi. We (your adoring fans) miss you and wish you the best, even if that means discontinuing the blog. I hope that’s not the case but if it is, so be it. I met you both during your book tour in Chicago and y’all were just the nicest, most humble people (duh! of course you were). It felt like chatting with old friends. I know I speak for all of us when I say your blog brightens my day. Be well J, S, C, & T!

    Reply
  21. Leigh Ann says

    October 1, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    Miss you so much! I checked today because it was October 1… REALLY hoping you guys would be back!

    Reply
  22. Jenn says

    October 1, 2014 at 9:36 pm

    Thinking of you!

    Reply
  23. photobonafide says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:15 pm

    Ya’ll…. Come back!! I miss you… ever.day! I miss you!

    Reply
  24. Nicole W. says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:16 pm

    Still come back to check in everyday, like I have for years… and I miss you, friends! Please do not feel pressured by comments like this, I just want you to know what a huge impact you’ve had on sooo many readers. Be proud! Stay confident! We love you and we miss you and we genuinely care about your well being. Wish nothing but the BEST for your crazy fun family – no matter what that means.

    Reply
  25. Beth says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:50 pm

    You guys!!! I miss you way more than I thought I would. I mean, I knew I would, but gosh!!! I completely understand and respect your choices, but I so have my fingers crossed that you’re coming back with a vengeance!!! <3

    Reply
  26. Mary Buckelew says

    October 1, 2014 at 10:54 pm

    Miss you.

    Reply
  27. Tracie W says

    October 1, 2014 at 11:09 pm

    I’m so looking forward to when you guys come back! Miss your posts and your family!

    Reply
  28. Jen says

    October 1, 2014 at 11:25 pm

    one week from today it will mark one month of this post – can you tell I’m anxiously awaiting the next?
    hope this much needed/deserved break has brought your little family some time to recharge
    XO

    Reply
  29. Brenda says

    October 2, 2014 at 12:41 am

    I’m ready for you to come back, are you?

    Reply
  30. Barb A. says

    October 2, 2014 at 1:00 am

    Reallllly missing your posts. :(

    Reply
  31. Lucia says

    October 2, 2014 at 3:37 am

    From Italy. please, come back soon!!! I followed you every day since 2008 and now you miss. I love you!

    Reply
  32. Carmen says

    October 2, 2014 at 4:29 am

    Totally understand it all BUT please come back soon! Yes the blog has changed over the years, but so does everything. Change is the only certainty there is. The negative commenters just changed in a different way and thus the blog lost some of its appeal, but others will grow into it, and many have changed with you. Best of luck whatever you decide.

    Reply
  33. Ruth says

    October 2, 2014 at 6:07 am

    I miss you!! I hope you decide to come back :)

    Reply
  34. Pam Groom says

    October 2, 2014 at 7:52 am

    Miss you guys. Love coming at you from your internet fans.

    Reply
  35. Teri says

    October 2, 2014 at 8:14 am

    I miss you guys! I hope you are finding peace and clarity during this respite. Selfishly I am hoping you will be back soon. :) Take care.

    Reply
  36. Tara says

    October 2, 2014 at 8:43 am

    I miss you! Hope your time off is refreshing and that you come back soon!

    Reply
  37. Nancy S says

    October 2, 2014 at 8:57 am

    How is your break going? Just wanted to echo many others when I say I miss you terribly. I hope you come back!

    Reply
  38. Crystal says

    October 2, 2014 at 8:57 am

    Still checking in a couple times a week. . . Missing you! Hopefully you’re enjoying your time off and collecting your thoughts. If you decide it’s best to leave for good I have one small request. Can we at least have a big send off week? Wishing you the best no matter what!!

    Reply
  39. Sandy Alexander says

    October 2, 2014 at 9:02 am

    I still visit your site everyday, hoping that you’re back. Take your time, but please, hurry up already!

    Reply
  40. Abby says

    October 2, 2014 at 9:35 am

    Miss you guys! Hope you are doing well!

    Reply
  41. Annie Lee says

    October 2, 2014 at 9:47 am

    Le sigh.

    Reply
  42. Ashley says

    October 2, 2014 at 9:49 am

    It’s just not the same without having my Young House Love email in my inbox every morning! I definitely miss you guys. Hope everything is going well and can’t wait to see you back online!!

    Reply
  43. Julie says

    October 2, 2014 at 10:14 am

    Miss you guys! Please come back soon. The blog world is dull without you there. There is no other to take your place. Your blog is truly unique and one of a kind. Love you guys!!

    Reply
  44. alexandraoldandnew says

    October 2, 2014 at 10:33 am

    I love your blog! I never felt like it was less than. I don’t know what was said or what happened, but i will miss your posts. I hope you come back to it! Have a good break. I know things lose their luster sometimes when you add pressure to make a living from it. I loved hearing about your side projects though and i look forward to your new book!

    Reply
  45. Christy File says

    October 2, 2014 at 10:49 am

    You all are amazing and we love you. But we all come to this point in our life. I have been fostering homeless dogs for a while but I stopped and looked around and I haven’t had time to do anything in my house, which I miss. And I haven’t had time to relax at all. So I re-focused, made a plan to cut back, and started acting on it. I don’t know where I will be in 2 months but that’s ok, I can always refocus then when I see how I feel.
    I think you all are just the best and I pray you find the right path for your family. We only get one life, and it is too short, and you should fill every day with the things you love and the things that make this your best life (I love Oprah). Best wishes for you as you search and thank you for just being you!!

    Reply
  46. Katelyn says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:07 am

    OH MY GOD PLEASE COME BACK PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!

    Reply
  47. Ashley Hazelton says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:08 am

    I have been reading your blog for about 4 years and I am sad to see you guys go. I keep checking back hoping that I will see a new post. Hope you are all doing well
    & we will await your return! :)

    Reply
  48. Yesenia says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:20 am

    I’m still checking everyday with hopes of NOT seeing the Feeeeelings post. It’s been nearly a month, and I’m counting down! I cannot wait until you come back to your blog and continue to be awesome just like you always have! Hugs to all of you: Sherry, John, Clara, Baby Teddy, and Burger.

    Reply
  49. Donna S. says

    October 2, 2014 at 11:57 am

    I too check daily to see if you have posted. Hope your break is going well. A lot of people, including myself are missing YHL!

    Reply
  50. Beth Shepherd says

    October 2, 2014 at 12:41 pm

    Do come back please. When you’re ready, make a plan and stick to it (I know you’re both good at that). Do what feels right… one or two months off a year, one week off each month, whatever feels right. All full-time+ jobs give time off, and this is sooo much more than just a full-time job. It’s your life. We miss you and look forward to your return with whatever frequency helps you find a better balance.

    Reply
    • Jamie D says

      October 2, 2014 at 2:26 pm

      Love that! Wholeheartedly agree.

      Miss your humor and family updates so very much!

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