I Want A Bean Feast
Does anyone get that reference? Willy Wonka. Remember the bratty girl who wants the world and sings about it? One of the lines is “I want a feast… I want a bean feast.” At least I’m 80% sure that’s what she says and it has always struck me as weird. Wouldn’t you want a candy feast or a mac & cheese feast as opposed to a bean feast?
Anyway, moving on. The point is not that I want a bean feast, it’s that I want a lot from our next house just like that bratty girl who turns into a giant blueberry (correction: a few smart commenters/Willy Wonka experts have since informed me that I’ve mixed up my girls and the bratty girl was Veruca Salt, who wasn’t the one who turned into a blueberry). Oh well, the picture still makes me laugh. The point? I want a Jeff Lewis house. That’s realistic, right?
Allow me to explain. Many of you know about my obsession with Flipping Out, and those who watch probably get my reference to a Jeff Lewis house. He is pretty darn amazing at taking a house that’s reasonably modest (and usually ranchy or just plain stout looking) and turning the dial from dated to I-don’t-know-how-he-does-it amazing. So although John and I go back and forth about whether we need another three bedroom house with the addition of an office or whether we actually want a four bedroom house (it’s kind of the same difference, right?) we always come back to the same thing when we stalk MLS and drive by every house that even remotely fits our specs: is it a Jeff Lewis house?
See, there’s a sweet spot. It can’t be too amazing looking off the bat. That would be too easy for Jeff – and we’ve also learned with our house that a good after is semi dependent on a pretty spare and unamazing before. Otherwise it’s just a tweak. In other words, something that’s a nine is easy to make a ten, but we like aiming low… for a three perhaps, and trying to bring that up. Plus plain potential-filled houses are less expensive than their shiny all-done counterparts, and it all goes back to one thing: we’re cheap.
Does it mean that we’re destined to end up with another ranch (since Jeff does his fair share of ranch-tastic makeovers)? Maybe. We’re definitely open to everything as long as it’s old and not too big (we like character and a bit of coziness) but I can’t say that I don’t get a little misty eyed at the idea of finding another long, low-to-the-ground-ranch to call our own. Especially one in need of a peaked roof or a new porch.
How has this odd JL obsession worked out? Well, the “is it a Jeff Lewis house” question that we ask ourselves as we search is a good one. It easily allows us to drive by a house that’s completely fabulous and say “next” (instead of getting all caught up in how perfect it is) and it also allows us to squint at some really sad exteriors and play WWJD (what would Jeff do). We imagine this evaluation tool will also carry over when we’re actually touring houses because we know all about how we can open doorways or refinish floors (been there done that) and we also have a few Jeff Lewis tricks to reference going into house numero dos (like the use of dark stain on exposed beams or raw stone on fireplaces or even a rich saturated wall color- hey you never know). We definitely want to put a unique stamp on our next home as opposed to just cloning our first one.
In summary: I don’t want a bean feast, I want an ugly house with a whole lotta room for improvement. And I wouldn’t be mad if Jenny, Sarah, and Zoila were around for support. Just saying.
What about you guys? Do you loathe him? Love him? Don’t know who the heck I’m talking about? Either way you must have heard of Zoila right? She’s a modern day Rosie from the Jetsons.
Blueberry girl image courtesy of Willy Wonka (the original). The images of homes/rooms by Jeff Lewis above are from here, here, and here. Sweet Zoila’s from here.
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I totally get it. But for us, it’s “is this a Woody Allen apartment?” I dream of a big, rambling pre-war apartment with a proper dining room, tons of windows and a long hallway. As you know, not easy to come by here. So our only chance of having such a place is finding a wreck. Our currently place was a mess. But hey! We have a sunken living room. So I totally get it. .
That’s hilarious! I play the WWJSD (What would John & Sherry do?) game ALL the time. I’ve even been calling it that for months!
I have never watched his show either, but I will have to look for it now and see what he is all about. But either way I can’t wait to see what kind of house you guys buy and what you will have in store for it. It’s going to be another great journey with YHL no matter what. :)
Glad to hear that someone else is obsessed with Flipping Out!! I LOVE that show! I love Jeff, think he is hilarious but really love Zoila, she makes the show! We are house shopping now as well and we have the same wish list! Good luck!
i always thought that she said “big feast” in her upper crust accent. bean feast?! reminds me of when my youngest son sang these words to the pina colada song: “If you like bean enchiladas, and getting caught in the rain . . .”
My boyfriend and I dressed up as Veruca and Willie Wonka for Halloween! So funny to see it mentioned!!
I love love love Jeff Lewis!!! He is hysterical!
now i have the willy wonka song in my head….”Cream buns and doughnuts and fruitcake with no nuts…”
L-O-V-E!! his show always makes me laugh… he is my secret best friend (he doesn’t know it and I don’t know him so it is a BIG secret!).
I LOVE Jeff Lewis! Although sometimes I feel SO bad for Zoila (I can’t believe how much she has to clean!!) I just love the ensemble of characters on that show! :)
LOVE LOVE LOVE Jeff Lewis! My husband and I stumbled upon his show randomly and were hooked. His dry sense of humour coupled with Jenny’s edgy sweetness makes for a hilarious show. And, I hope we all never have to deal with a Vlad:)
A bean-feast is primarily an annual dinner given by an employer to his workmen. By extension, colloquially, it describes any jollification. The word, and its shorter form “beano,” are fairly common in Britain, less known in the United States.
From Wikipedia.
Love the Lewis aesthetic but not so much the neuroses. When Zoila stood in the NYC women’s dressing room (when he took her on the shopping spree) and said to him “My milkshake bring all the boys to the yard” I thought I would die. Fabulous!
I love Jeff Lewis. I would loovvveeee to work in that office.
I love Flipping Out with Jeff Lewis too! Of course I love his crew as well, Zoila is my favorite! “Jeffrey Lewis I touch Monkey A-hole.” Does it get funnier?..no way.
LOVE him! But Zoila is my fave!
I need an education…I have no idea who you’re talking about…JL or Zolla. I claim not much tv watching and living on a different continent as my excuse. You speak a totally different language and I don’t understand it :) hehe…
I’ve never seen ‘Flipping Out’ though I admit that I want to after the many references you’ve made on here. I just wanted to say I love your kooky (no idea if that’s how you spell that) comments, like asking yourself WWJD. And, I love hearing your thought process & (I mean this is the kindest, most loving way possible) seeing your slightly dorky side show.
:)
I’m excited to see the house you pick & what you do with your new casa.
LOL! I knew the reference right away! My best friends and I used to sing that one line ALL the time in high school (that was a while ago, but not THAT long). We never could figure out why anyone would want a feast of beans, either. :)
Ha! I have never seen Flipping Out, so the whole time I was reading this, I thought you were talking about Jeff Lewis the improv comic from LA. (Who is very funny!)
Whoops!
I haven’t missed one Flipping Out since it started. I knew it was for me when I saw Jeff measuring the walls so a piece of furniture could be perfectly centered on the wall. His sense of humor is hilarious and design sense is amazing. Jeff is my hero!!!
100% agree– Jeff Lewis (& the whole gang) is the best! After watching the entire series, I recently learned that a family friend was the previous owner of Valley Oak One, and was beyond excited!
Re: bean feast–I also love that line and find it a little strange. But the British…they love their Heinz Baked Beans… :)
I’m biased on this, but have you considered a split level for your next home? They’re seriously underrated! We’ve found that our four-level split is the perfect size for our growing family and the layout really works for us. (We were anxious about the stairs at first, but our son, who is now two cruises them like no one’s business.) Just a thought!
It’s definitely something we’re open to! John’s parents have an awesome split level that we love.
xo,
s
LOVE me some Jeff Lewis! BUT instead of fixing a fixer-upper myself, I’d want him to come and do it for me while Zoila, Jenny and I sit around drinking coffee while getting verbally abused by JL!
Jeff Lewis is conceited and incredibly cruel–I can’t stand him!
Love Love JL.
love flipping out, love jeff lewis, and LOVE zoila, she’s the funniest lady ever!!!!
I used to love, love, love him. In fact, he was my gay crush.
Then I watched him sit there and do nothing when Trace was slapped across the face, and Jenny groped by that obnoxious, drunk client of theirs. Jeff talks a big game about a lot of things, but in this case he just sat there and did nothing. Where was his rant about that? I’m not sure how much this client was paying the design firm, but I suppose it was a lot considering he valued keeping the client fat and happy over his employees safety and dignity. I lost all respect for him after watching that scene :(
I love JL, but I doubt I would last one day in his office he would make mince meat out of me. I did change my voice mail to be like his.
The real question is would you let him babysit Clara? He seemed to delight in teaching the beautiful Chloe some of the funniest naughty kid things around.
I love Jeff Lewis and his crew!! Amazingly so does my hubs, who is a teensy bit OCD himself. Not quite like looking in a mirror but enough to make him squirm. We are trying to decide when to put our lovely large ranch (all redone like yours) on the market. Our problem is where to move. We’re nearing retirement and want to buy something in another state. Do we rent until then… what to do??? When we do start looking to buy, we’ll be wanting a JL before and always wondering WWJD. For those who don’t like Jeff. He’s just one of the unfortunates without a filter on his mouth but he is awfully repentant afterward. My dad was like that… no problem for me :)
I LOVE Jeff Lewis and Zoila!! He is hilarious and a great designer.
I LOVE LOVE Jeff Lewis. I even have my husband watching him. Now he understands what I mean when I say “when we hit the lottery, I want Jeff Lewis to desing our new house!” BTW- I can relate to his smart mouth too! Even though sometimes he does tick me off a bit with his cruelty.
I believe that the girl who turned into the blueberry was named Violet. I love Jeff Lewis. His House Beautiful kitchen of the year was amazing. I also love his entire staff. Zoila is hysterical. I agree that sometimes Jeff is cruel when he’s angry. However, he seems to be making strides in apologizing and reducing his number of cruel outbursts.
Huh…..I always thought by “bean feast” she was referring to jelly beans!
LOVE Jeff Lewis….the thing I love most about him is when you can’t tell if he’s being sarcastic or serious. He has got that down for sure. I haven’t seen the show in ages…I don’t even know if they’ve made any new ones. Since I watch very little tv I haven’t been able to keep up w/ channel changes so I kind of lost track of a lot of shows.
Flipping Out is my favourite, although ’9 by design’ is inching in on that territory too. Love Jeff, he is the funniest, and his style is impeccable!
My nickname is Bean too so I found it funny that I’ve never realized that’s what she says in Willy Wonka!
Being the wife of an IT nerd, I use google for every question that ever comes up!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bean-feast
I found this interesting, also, because I’m 1/2 Britt!
I LOVE JEFF and all his craziness. One of my favorite shows which is big since I’m a reality tv junkie these days.
I’m OBSESSED with Willy Wonka and I’ve watched all the extras on the DVD. In the commentary part, they explain that a bean feast is the term for a big party with everything you could ever imagine. I don’t know why it’s called that but they said it doesn’t really have anything to do with beans.
Someone may have already pointed this out, but a bean-feast is just an extravagant feast: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bean-feast
She specifies wanting cakey things at her bean feast, like cream puffs and “fruitcake with no nuts” (which is funny since fruitcake is usually half nuts and subsequently this is an annoying picky request… like a candy bar with no chocolate).
I was taught that term “bean feast” comes from a French tradition that involves a banquet with a special kind of cake, in which a bean is hidden. The person who finds the bean is the king of the banquet (or the “bean feast”) and maybe gets a toy crown or something. It’s supposedly the tradition that the New Orleans Mardi Gras king cakes follow, but in New Orleans the “bean” in the cake is a plastic Baby Jesus doll. Which I realize is weird, and needs further explanation, but at this point, I’ll just link you to the Wikipedia entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_cake .
The first time I viewed “Flipping Out” I really felt
I must change the channel! However I hung tight and watched it. I have not missed an episode since. I love the whole crew and how they work their magic. As difficult and hard Jeff is he chose to share with us the breakup of his relationship with the love of his life. Jeff is so special and loving. I hope he falls in love this next year . He was adorable with his ex’s adopted daughter. Oh, and by the way he is the best designer on tv :)